Kids on the spectrum don't belong in mainstream school

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I didn't really suffer bullying but I could never do the work at mainstream school.

I think because I was too hyperactive.

I ended up going to a boarding school type place where we did a lot of sport and dancing and stuff.

Some of the girls were put in normal classes to do reading and writing and stuff but the rest of us did trampoline. I got certificates for that and I knocked my tooth out when I did a forward summersault.

I still find it hard to be mainstream, it takes me a lot of focus and it makes me get tired quick.

Things like being beaten up, your head stuck in a toilet, things getting taken from you or things sabotaged. Things like this:


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CnOJgDW0gPI


That is why I think bullying doesn't get taken seriously because people have lived in a bubble like I have and don't realize how bad it can get because they have never witnessed it. So the media has been showing it. Someone even asked on another forum if kids are really that cruel because someone wrote a story on a forum about a 14 year old girl with autism and someone was shocked how cruel kids were in her school so he started a new thread asking "Are people really this cruel?" I have never had anything poured on my head like that one girl in the story. I am not sure if it was the author's experience or not with bullying. But it was awful even I would probably want to go home too or just run and hide from everyone and not care about my school work and probably drop out which my mom thinks I might have done if we didn't move.

Compare that bullying to the ones I got was not bad at all. It makes mine look trivial and that one boy too who may have had AS also. So I consider myself lucky. Yes it still affected me. It doesn't make it any less valid. It just means I didn't have it that bad because of all the worse things bullies have done and victims have gotten I never got. I know this talk bothers lot of people when bad things have happened to them so you tell them what worst things have happened to others but for me it always makes me feel good instead of the other way around like my problems are not valid.

My personal observation of adults on the AS is that those that went to Special Schools are far more lacking in social skills than persons with the same condition that went to a mainstream one, and are also far more intellectually "stunted".

Based upon my observations the conclusion I have come to is that the "ceiling" of a persons potential is governed by the people that they spend most of their time with durin the developmental stages (childhood) & company they keep durin that time.

I therefore consider that the option of special schools should only be kept for the most severe cases, and that if possible the rest should integrate into mainstream BUT WITH ADDITIONAL SUPPORT.

People on the spectrum are more likely to be bullied by their peers at school & this can have a severe impact on academic achievement.

I agree with many of the other posters, it really depends.
I am in a mainstream school which I have good experiences and bad experiences in.
Though for a while now I have been fantasizing about getting a diagnosis and being able to make my life better with it, like explaining how over stimulated, stressed and frustrated I get in a normal class and asking someone if I could do the work on my own.
I would be perfectly fine like this and I would see no need in going to a special school.

So, as for most questions, the answer is "it depends".

I would guess that the 1s who are more severely affected would be more likely to go to a special school.
I learned better in the dyslexia school I went to compared to all the other schools because things were in a better format & pace for me. I didn't learn lots of stuff I was supposed to in lots of classes in the other schools. The only reason I was never held back a grade is because some of my teachers curved it but even if I was held back I still would of struggled a hell of a lot in those classes. I read slow, I get names, places, terms, dates, order of wors when i type, diagrams that need labeling, & instructions confused & mixed-up. I just cant learn & test well in the way regular schools teach some(or lots of) coarses. Sense dyslexia & other learning disorders are common amongst Aspies & that regular schools don't teach & test in the right format for that; I think special schools would be better for learning for those of us on the spectrum as well as NTs who have learning disabilities or are learning disabled.

So how would the OP propose we be prepared for real life? Should we be sent to special schools with the hope of working at special needs only jobs? Living in special needs only neighborhoods? Here's a hint, there aren't any of those.

So, you say it's like throwing a sheep into the wolves. Guess what? Sheep are around wolves every day. Sheep learn to run fast. I know that some get eaten and killed and I'm not saying it's ok for any special kid to be metaphorically eaten and killed by the other kids at school, because the parents can take them out if need be. Why not learn from it? Learn fro your mistakes and others mistakes! Otherwise, you end up living at home with your mother and a bunch of cats and have a meltdown if your favorite spoon isn't clean when it's your exact lunch time!

Yes, there are some kids who can't ever get past that stage. They do need special handling and help. But what is your idea of help? Is it enabling all of us to just give in to AS and let it ruin our lives, or is it to help us learn what is different about us, fix it, and try and fit in with the world? Many, many of us can learn and grow and toughen up. We can't do that in a world of hugs and high fives. We can't do that when in only one place we are considered great kids and where we fit in and when we walk out of hat sacrosanct environment we are hit with what is really out there.

You think that a kid who went to special school for 12 years could actually hack it in college with all the other NT kids around if they had no exposure to them and what they may think of our quirks, which may be perfectly normal and OK in a special environment but not in the real world? How are we supposed to learn what is and is not ok in the functioning course of human interaction if we are kept sheltered like hothouse flowers?

All your idea will do is create a ton of disabled AS adults who won't be able to function in the real world and will end up not only living at home with their parents and completely dependent but will be a drain on the system later in life after their parents die because they aren't prepared to live in the actual world out there, beyond all the cute songs and affirmations.

QFT


I am hoping the world learns to fit in with us.


I agree, but I still think public education is harsh. To be honest "real life" was as much apparent there as in any other of my experiences; if anything I think children are allowed to be crueler than adults. They get a pass 'cause they're young.

From personal experience, I was in special ed for most of my school years. Most of that time, I was in a mainstream school that served as a collection point for special ed students; most of the day, we were kept in a separate special classroom, generally for the main academic subjects and only for things like gym and art class (sometimes) would we be wtih the normal kids. The rest of that time, I was either in a special school or a mental hospital in which there were classes.

During elementary school, nearly all of which was in special ed, my parents and I frequently tried to mainstream me, but the attempts at mainstreaming failed because I could not get along with the normal kids well and I always ended up back in special ed. Most of the time, the school staff did not think I should be fully mainstreamed and resisted my parents' attempts to mainstream me. My parents were concerned that I was learning dysfunctional behaviors from the other special ed kids. Even during the mainstream attempts, because I was not zoned for the schools I attended, I rode the "short bus," which I found stigmatizing.

When I started middle school in 7th grade, I was in special much like the model above. I rode the "short bus" like above. My behavior had become more disruptive in 7th grade and my grades were not as good. For 8th grade, we had relocated, and my parents tried me in full-time regular ed. It was a disaster; I felt like I had no support and I had no idea what to do: I ended up becoming very disruptive and confused. By January, I was expelled from the school. I then went to the hospital for the first time, for about a week and a half, and then I went to a special school, where I did better.

In the summer before high school, I was admitted to go to my regular high school, but I had developed psychosis and was put in residential treatment for 6 months at a hospital where I went to school. I then went back to the special school for the remainder of 9th grade and the beginning of 10th. I then was mainstreamed again and I did much better! Though I had my problems along the way, I felt a lot more supported, I had a lot better idea of what I needed to do, and I ended up getting on OK!

I then went on to college and now have a 4-year degree and work full-time.

I went to regular ed for the duration. My reaction was to withdraw. I found hiding places. I started cutting myself in Grade 8. I always appreciated the education though. I ended up getting a bachelor's but have always struggled with full time work. Although I appreciate the education and don't believe in second guessing, I do know that school psychologically damaged me.

And how many NT kids withdraw and cut themselves? Hello.

Do they not? I'm not sure. Either way, evil exists everywhere - school zones don't apply.

Jesus yes. You has a typical of the time, teenage reaction to things. It wasn't an aspie reaction. Just cause you have AS does not make everything you do aspie. I don't know any teenage girl who is a friend of my girls that hasn't cut themselves. That's sad, but it's a thing now. And yes, they all did it for the same reason you did. They didn't fit in.

Hell, my youngest daughter took an American Sign Language class at school and she came home and told me that the unofficial sign for Emo is dragging a razor across your wrists. Many, many kids do this. This wasn't because of your autism nor because of the bullies. It was your emotional response to it. I put my head down and took it, then learned to fight back because I had to, and it was the 70's. Nowdays you can't fight back cause of zero tolerance. So what can you use to fight back? Self harm. It's breeding a whole generation of kids who feel like "That'll show em!" is how to do things. Passive aggressive out the ass is what it is. We need some good, old fashioned defensive aggressive taught!

I may be able to fit in and deal and do all those things I can do now because I learned to stand up for myself them. And my skin got thicker too. Lets say you wanted to learn ice skating. There in whatever sheltered, homeschooled, protected aspie world you are dreaming up ok? You still have to put on the skates, and probably the coat, scarf, gloves, helmet and knee pads your mother wanted, but you go out and try it. You start learning to skate that first day. It feels good. You fall a few times but you get back up, with the teacher, the two aids and the extra helper there to help you. You learn. You can even skate without somebody holding your hand. But when you take off your skates to put your shoes back on after, you have a blister on your heel. From the skates. Now, the parent can say "Oh no! NEVER AGAIN!" and scream about her poor baby being given skates that will cause a blister (they all do) or she can put a bandaid on them and tell you to go back out again next Wednesday. You had the good and the bad from it. The falling, and the skating. At first the falling is more than the skating but the more you work, the better you get. You keep trying and that blister in the heel is going to turn into a callous.

Those of you who hate your high school years so much, try and think back and find just a few minutes you DID like. I bet there were some, but you probably put them so far down in your mind that you can't even reach them because you were bullied so bad. It took me years to remember mine, but there were quite a few, even though it was what it was. And no, mine weren't like other peoples. But still.

I think it's awful that this has become an acceptable norm. I think it's a sign that things are not working properly and need to change.


For me it's not about "that'll show em," it's more "pain, blood, good . . . feel better" and then try (tried) to hide it. It seems to have become glamorous.

My high school years were like my renaissance, especially the 12th grade. I actually became bullied a lot less toward the end of high school, with both the ableist and homophobic slurs that I had dealt with for most of my previous school years being toned down. People still kinda messed with me for coming across as eccentric, but it never really bothered me all that much, especially in the 12th grade.

Great post.

Doucehbag does not equal evil ok?