wp getting annoying

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I do too I am currently in the middle of preparing a response for her other post. But I do want to say I love her posts.

I know I have used the term ret*d in the past and I am sorry if I hurt or frustrated you. As for your posts I can't believe you were told your posts are not worthy, that's terrible. Your posts are wonderful and I enjoy reading all of them.
I also hate how other insist I'm an aspie just because I am coherent and smart. Or tell me I can't be autistic because I have feelings.
Unlike these dr.'s parents and people who think I'm aspie.I have developmental delays and had intense therapy since I was little. I've gone to programs for developmentally disabled people my whole life and been in special ed with modified assiments and have been significantly below grade level in most areas my whole life.
If you had any significant delay at all or getting a child with the exclusion of possibly socially you do not have aspergers you have autism.
Same thing if you have a speech delay.
This is not coming from my opinion this is coming from the DSM-IV.



I don't get why people are reluctant to call me Autistic and they have absolutely no problem saying I'm as, nt or something similar or just say I'm normal or whatever. Or The people but so much aspie pride but insist that people with low functioning autistics should be cured and or use there Autism to justify them being aborted or the people who bully people who are low functioning It's insulting and dehumanizing.

I was telling somebody at work about you the other day, I said something like, "She's diagnosed as low functioning, but if she's low functioning, I don't know what that makes me!"

My point in saying that was not that you don't fit the criteria for low functioning or that you don't have difficult struggles, because I know you do. I just really think that term low functioning needs to be changed and made more specific because Low Functioning conjures up images of somebody who really is not able to think for themselves or have any hand in how their life turns out at all. You are low functioning in some areas, but excel greatly in others. WHich is what I would also say about KingdomOfRats. I really hate that this crap happens to both of you. But the terminology should be changed, it's not correct.

Having classic autism is something else, people who say that you don't have that just don't understand what they are talking about.

You know it's kind of funny if what you said it was applied to the diagnosis is I probably wouldn't be so confused and at times felling like a faker or being in denial.


Because the doctors would actually be able to diagnose me correctly instead of being scared of labeling me or being arrogant.

It's not your fault, it's not that you are a faker, it's that psychiatry doesn't still know everything they think they know.

I know this is just that some people have told me that it seem like i "want to be autistic" and I wish instead of jumping in the therapy so quickly they would've diagnosed me first I mean nobody where my family even have an accurate representation of how I was when I was little ( (becides my evaluatios)and I can barely remember.

Although I did come to my grandmother under the negative circumstances let's call it and I was diagnosed with a seizure disorder so idk. They should've connected my other developmental delays into something i'm sure a seizure disorder wont give you such a significant physical delay that you would almost need orthopedics or other delays. But I guess it's because my mom and/or other guardians didn't act on my symptoms they just acted on my particular seizure like qualities.

I think this is really highly relevant to this thread topic. People thinking people want to be autistic or want to have asperger's or want to claim disabilities or weaknesses they don't have as an excuse to avoid taking action. I think you just want to be clear on why you struggle the way you do, but if you say Autistic to describe that struggle, some people almost wet their pants trying to tear you down for saying it.

I think Autism like a lot of physical diseases can be treat to SOME affect. If you have a kidney infection, you take antibiotics. Autism can probably never be cured, but we can work on it, we can solve some problems. But most of us are alone in this struggle on a daily basis and even those of us who have therapists often come here and detail how the therapists don't understand autism. We have to talk about it to figure out what is is and how to deal with it. Since psychiatry still doesn't understand it fully, we have to figure it out together.

I guess what I'm trying to say is we don't want to have Autism or Asperge's we want to understand what they are.

That seizure disorder - really complicates things, I don't know much about seizures, but that's an example of how confusing these diagnoses can get.

Yes and it's the same thing if you talk positively about autism or you call out someone but trying to use pity on someone with autism.

I'm not one of those of those autism is the next step in evolution people but I do believe they just like nts people with autism are essential to exsit. I don't think they're better or worse or even more or less essential then nts I just think they're both equally as essential to life.

When I tried to say that not only can't cure autism they shouldn't cure it. I normally go though this type of stuff when I try to convince my family that people with Autism should not be treated ad Angels Devils or anything like that but they should be treated as human beings.

This is when people usually say it's like I want to be autistic looking at it like when cartman wanted to have Tourette's in South Park or join the Special Olympics. My family keeps saying that Autistic people are sick and then I shouldn't put myself in their catogory or the people in my program.And my other camp with mostly kids who aren't really even that disabled well actually it's hard to say because there nts and don't have a cognitive disability or developmental disability just a physical handicap.

And calls someone who CP who is in the honors program in an elite school that requires a certain grade average and that's a very fast and vigorous curriculum that I even though wanted to go to cannot keep up with in a million years more disabled than me.

Good point.

And I'll concede that it's not up to me to say someone should HAVE to be this way or that way. All I can say is, "hey, man, you've got options. What you want isn't impossible." All it takes is what some of us call a good, old-fashioned paradigm-shift. But I think I'd do people more harm than good if all I did was let people think there was no way out of the hole they're in.

But what if I decided it was up to me to tell you that you aren't doing enough just making your little records and thinking if you're lucky you might break even. You really need to shift your paradigm, because I say so, I know about your life from what I read here and that's all I need to know about you to make this decision. I have a responsibility now to tell you that now.

By the way, I hope you are not thinking that what I'm saying is that people should sit back and whine and not challenge themselves for their whole lives, I'm just saying that I think sometimes for a while that may be necessary for them, but mostly I'm saying I think people who aren't just sitting back and whining are being accused of doing that.

I come here every day, I don't post much but I read a lot. *shrugs*

Poisoning the well is a specific term referring to a rhetorical device in which negative information about something is preemptively presented, something you have done many times. Poisoning the well does not apply when describing things someone has done repeatedly. A more apt idiom in this case is that you have made your bed, now you get to lie in it. I didn't make it for you.

You spend a lot of time trying to assert that I am holding an irrational grudge, but no one forced you to say the things you've said to/about me in other threads, and all I am left with is reporting how you've attempted to treat me. The "grudge" commentary is one of the many forms of ad hominem you wield against me in an attempt to discredit me, and that is again your choice, not something I forced onto you. It is true that I do hold a grudge, but that is because of my experiences interacting with you, not because I decided to dislike you out of nowhere.

Also, your terrible habit of writing your responses inside quote boxes makes your responses unreadable.

This period is for many a kind of processing and trying to understand. When people learn they're autistic or have some other disorder they didn't know about there's a period of time they need to adjust to this information. This often leads to emotions such as despair (I'll never be able to do anything worthwhile!), grief (what could my life have been?), relief (now I know why everything is so hard!) and so on.

Another thing is that sometimes something really is impossible but people who only have a thin slice of information about that person finding that thing impossible decide they must be exaggerating or lying or just not trying hard enough, without knowing how hard or how long that person may have tried. I can't learn to drive. It's not a question of how hard I try or how far outside my comfort zone I push myself because those aren't the problems. It's not because I believe autistic people can't drive (many can). It's because I have cognitive issues that make it dangerous for me to drive on a road with other moving vehicles. It's that my visual processing makes it hard to pay attention to the road and things on the road at the same time. It's that every attempt I've made to actually learn how to drive has gone very badly because of those problems. At this stage, I am willing to say "I can't drive."

And sometimes "can't" is a boundary, and it can be a boundary for good reason. And trying to push someone over it is an attempt to violate their boundaries. Especially for many of us, being pushed into things one can't do and having it fail spectacularly or wreck us cognitively has been a common experience, in school or from parents or friends. Using "can't" is a way to stop a particular line of discussion because it isn't going to happen.

Then I consider myself well-informed. And will take that under consideration.

Look, I'm not "commanding" anyone to do what I say. I just want to find what's causing the problem and fix it. "Because I say so" isn't good reason for anything.

You're picking on my making me "little records." OK, what about it? I've got $700 set aside specifically for that purpose--all the bills are paid, we have money set aside if something catastrophic happens, and if this project is a complete loss (it inherently CAN'T be a complete loss, more on that later), I can make that money back by playing 4 or 5 private party cocktail piano gigs. If it flops, my family still gets three hots and a cot every day. And I CAN'T lose, because for the investment I get a small amount of inventory. I estimate I can turn $700 into $4000, and I can sell 100 units just to friends and family…not to mention I could stand to make some good money just playing promotional concerts--so breaking even is NOT a problem. And I can potentially turn the promo concerts into a yearly event and earn an extra up to $2k a year just doing that. If I end up with a lot of surplus inventory, I'd just go to Amazon and sell until it all runs out if it turns out to be a flop. I MIGHT lose $700 if I sell absolutely NOTHING. I could gain UP TO $4000 if I sell EVERYTHING, and could pick up extra gigs for extra cash over and beyond that. Which would fully fund the next project.

Now, suppose I took out $10,000 on a second mortgage or credit card cash advances, put all into pro studio work, promo materials, etc., and couldn't even break even? Now I'm facing losing my house, barely keeping up interest payments, and possibly bankrupting my credit cards. I'm not prepared to accept that kind of risk, nor would I suggest anyone else try it. I'd never suggest any kind of debt to raise investment money. My goal is to cash-flow EVERYTHING I do, and that's only AFTER all the bills are paid. That way, I can afford to risk a failed project without myself or anyone else associated with me feeling that much of a sting from it.

Oh, and obviously I'm not planning to fail. I plan to do good work and give people their money's worth. Thing is, nobody PLANS to fail. But when dealing with risk, everyone needs an exit strategy they can live with. My strategy is to set a minimal investment and only expand my inventory IF there's a demand that justifies it.

In a perfect world, I'd use the impetus of album releases and promo concerts using as many free resources as I can to earn an extra $25k a year, assuming I couldn't do better, and pay off all our college loans and eventually get school paid for our own kids--that would be my 5-year plan, anyway. If it's really rockin' and rollin', I might have to put more money into extra resources (lighting, sound, etc.) and hit larger venues. But that's seriously long-term and my magic 8-ball isn't giving me straight answers in that direction. So I'm being realistic and dealing with what I CAN predict and what risks I can afford to take. I can do $700. I MIGHT be able to do more than that, but I'm not doing anything I can't cash-flow myself. What's important to me isn't even the money, anyway…just making music and sharing that with others. Every time I sell a CD, a download, or play a concert, I'm just asking for money so I can continue doing what I enjoy doing. That's all. And if I'm making enough money to do bigger and better/badder things, we ALL benefit--because now I can afford to do the kinds of shows I really WANT to do and accommodate bigger audiences (heck, I already play to audiences of a few hundred every week and even get time on TV--so once I'm independent from low-cost/no-cost resources and venues and could hire a crew to do what I want, things could get really amazing. But I won't be heartbroken if I never get there…that was never my goal. It all depends on how things go, and I'm just trying to pull in an extra $3k-$4k right now.

So, what would be helpful isn't to tell someone "YOU CAN'T DO THAT," but rather "Sure, you COULD do that, but you need to…" I mean, even if I thought you were serious, I can't afford to take anything that sounds defeatist very seriously. What I want to hear is what is going to give me results, not something that's going to discourage me from doing what I know CAN be done. There are people who WOULD do stuff if they for once just thought that they could. If they honestly believe they CAN'T when the opposite really is true, then there's no point in letting them whine and complain about it and validating them. If all they get is validation, then there's so much they COULD do they'd find more fulfilling, and we do them no favors by not encouraging them.

If all the problem is that someone just flat doesn't WANT to do anything about their situation, then there's nothing anyone can do for them. I think it's perfectly understanding if people find that annoying.

I also like her style and she knows what she's talking about as well.