LP0rc wrote:
I really hate it when people tell me what I think or feel, or try to emphasize a point by relating it to what they think I think or feel. They are almost always wrong. And even when I tell them exactly what I think and feel, they refuse to believe it.
Eventually I had to scream at one of my ex-wives that damn it, if there is anyone who can lay claim to being an expert on my thoughts, feelings, and motivations, and could answer simple and direct questions about them, it is ME!
However, the most annoying thing I don't understand is the sense of entitlement NTs seem to have. I don't care if you've had a bad day, aren't feeling well, or whatever. I don't care if you feel overwhelmed and put upon, I feel that way a lot myself, and it does not excuse poor behavior on my part, and I will not accept that it excuses poor behavior on your part. Especially in a work environment.
I have experienced that too. So much for Theory of Mind...
Sometimes it's like when people know you are different, they don't think we can judge ourselves what is inside us, they can do it much better, as the "normal" ones. Fortunately most NTs I have met are not like that.
Another thing is when they expect one to feel bad about something, per definition, without asking if that's the case. Eg. in the first part of my theology study, I had Latin and Greek lessons, which I liked (have always loved languages, and have had obsessions with certain ones). But they expected me to dislike it, because most others did!
When I was finished with those lessons, they'd say to me: so now you've got rid of the troublesome / hard work with the languages?
Doh! I didn't find it troublesome or hard, but they expected it without knowing or even asking! They couldn't even imagine that anyone actually could like it!
So no. NTs don't "know" what others think. They just believe they do (hence the
Theory of Mind).
Or they only use it for people like themselves.
I have this theory I've mentioned before, that ToM may just be projection with a more "acceptable" name.