First time in history!! !! The NT/AS open hotline ! !! !! !

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I think it comes from the herd mentality of those people who cannot understand/tolerate anything that is incongruent with that mentality. Instead, in order to "come to grips" with the difference, they must use labels to distinctly set apart those not like them. That way, they can justify their own prejudices and insecurities.

NB: I'm not being mean - it's simply what I've observed.

of course you don't, because you're just an awesome person.

Thank you.

If you says they are "taken back" by something you have said, what does it mean? Did I say something wrong if I got that response?

I thought I was cheering them up

In my experience this translates to them being surprised/shocked at what you said. Good in that it usually means the speaker is not offended or angry at what you said, just shocked, although not positive either.

At least I can say you're not alone with that problem, I've been trying to think of what to write to cheer you up for at least an hour now, and have nothing.

I'm guessing it's actually "taken aback" that they meant. (The meaning Huntedman gives is for this as well.)

Taken aback, I think in addition to indicating being surprised, well, not surprised in a good way. Like, not "surprised but glad". More like surprised with "why would someone do/say that".

I would say, if you got that response, you may or may not have said something you shouldn't've, but you likely didn't succeed in cheering them up.

Though, one can also be taken back in time by something someone says, as in, it causes one to reminisce. Though it would be odd to day "I was taken back" in that meaning without saying to when.

From a "not sure" to an NT: About what percentage of a conversation do you look into the other person's eyes?

50%. I do get uncomfortable with long periods of eye contact though. My husband tends to look at me for a seconds or two and then look away for many minutes. He looks at me when he makes a point he wants to make sure I get.

For me personally it is about 25 to even less. I have torn posters down because to look at them you have to look at their eyes. It is creepy and when I get a haircut I cant stand to look into her eyes even though I have known her pretty much my whole life. Eyes are windows into the soul as they say. Creepy soul though it is.

To an NT:

There are several questions I need to know.

1. Is it normal when, upon entering a romantic relationship, someone either (a) deletes their social networking sites, or (b) sets their privacy settings to hidden or unsearchable? If not, what does it usually signify?

2. Does asking for relationship-related advice constitute an inability to directly communicate with a partner?

3. If one person in a relationship is very inflexible in regard to certain things, and one is very flexible, does the flexible person have a weak personality and lack of motivation if he/she decides to wait for the inflexible person to make a decision before making a decision of his/her own?

Question for NT:

One common answer to "why are people mean" is "so they can feel better about themselves" - how does that work? I think I understand those kinds of "Yay, I stood up for myself / defended my territory"-type things but how does this work in people who are just mean to random strangers? Do they always feel slighted so they can avenge that, maybe?

Same question (maybe): What about this boss kicks guy, guy kicks his dog story? By what mechanism could that guy feel better about himself?

Third angle (are these even connected?): What about very judgmental people - I always sense some kind of satisfaction they get from putting others down. Where does that come from?

This has been bugging me for ages...

"Tell me something about yourself". How do you answer this?

I, would love to know that, as I'm asked it far too often and usually go "Um...My hair matches my eye colour?" (or something along those lines).

Question for the NT:

Why do I see packs of three to eight people, usually of the same sex or predominantly of just one sex, wandering aimlessly about the college/town? Why is a lone teenager so rare and why am I mocked when seen alone?

Question for aspies/NTs:

I'm starting a brand new college in September. I left the last one, in part, because I got myself into too much trouble with too many of the other students.
Is there anything I should avoid doing or ensure that I do to stay the college-wide bullying/hatred? (I know it's vague, but I have no idea what I did so wrong in the other college)

What is the best way to tell someone you don't like a food item or drink they have prepared for you?

I tried to be diplomatic, or at least what I thought was diplomatic, and it turns out I upset them (

Should you not say anything at all and just eat/drink what you're given or is it ok to say if you don't like something?

Rather than say you don't like the taste of something (which makes it seem like they prepared it incorrectly) say that it disagrees with you on a physical level. "I would love to eat this but broccoli upsets my stomach" or "no creamed beef for me, I have to watch my cholesterol" or something like that. When you turn something down, make the reason be about your body but not about your tastebuds. The implication is that you would eat it (since it is so delicious) if only your body would let you.

Janissy that is really helpful advice thank you.