You Might be an Aspie if...

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YMBAAI you refer to affixing a thread to the Discussion section as 'that nasty sticky stuff' and imagining the thread itself is expressing the sentiment.

Merle

If you have fun being arrested and point out security flaws in the police station.

.. if you were suckered into getting married at age 19
because you were asked before your worst aspie traits
hadn't a chance to show themselves
and it didn't work

.. you're attractive, 31, and still never been in a relationship

.. you can't stand saying Asperger because it sounds like as# bugers and being how you have to refer to the name a lot

.. you are permenantly logged into WP

.. you use alot of accronyms (it's part of our secret complexities)

.. you are like a combination lock that people have to guess the combo to in order
to get anywhere with you

.. you trust incredibly to easy or you don't trust at all but both are based on
whatever mood you're in and not base on factual evidense

.. you approach the world from the inside out

.. your plauged with the fear you may be alone the rest of your life
and go back and forth with being ok with the thought of that.

.. you write your friend incredibly long emails because you just communicate better that way

.. you communicate way more often in your head than outloud

.. you way overanalyze things and way overthink things

.. you start working on problems of any sort the moment your mind reaches
consciousness in the morning and your brain doesn't stop the rest of the day

.. you are forgetful... because you really don't care or you're easily distracted

.. you're 31 and don't have a job

.. people don't like you but don't know why

.. you went through childhood assuming ppl were constantly talking about you behind your back
while you walked by or were present and to offset this as an adult you decide to assume
everyone talks positively about you.. they're talking about you none the less

.. whenever you like someone.. they become "the one" whether they fit your desc. of what you want
or not

.. you psycho analyze ppl

.. you speak in a condescending/compassionate tone w'out thinking about it because you generally care about ppl
they think you're crazy or rude or dumb

.. you remember things in detail but mostly times you've made a complete ass of yourself and you
tend to ruminate on these times.. "how could i have went about that a different way?"

.. anything you do socially doesn't come across as natural because it wasn't it was premeditated years in advance

.. you are an instant target for just about anything in any situation, ppl just find you funny

.. you have nothing else better to do than to write things you have in common with other aspies and could probably be
content sitting at your computer the rest of the entire day coming up with things

.. you have no concept of time

.. you don't like being distracted when you are working on something.

.. you get incredibly bored in social situations and daydream about your escape

.. you like ppl around as long as you don't have to entertain them or talk to them

.. you prefer to answer questions about whether or not you have Asperger syndrome that were
actuall written by an aspie and not a NT who is just really trying to figure you out but has no clue
as to the way you think or what its like to be in your head..

.. you've had someone make the comment they'd go crazy if they spent one second in your head..
and said they would be shouting.. "make it stop, make it stop!"

.. you tend to learn social behaviors from movies or ppl you look up to, either way you mimic ppl
consciously and unconscioiusly.. and if your a girl mimicing guy behaviors your screwed.. (that was me)

.. you connect with anti-socials whether they are AS or not, this is one admirable AS trait

.. kids like you

.. kids NT parents find you odd

.. whatever

If you are sitting at 08:30 am in front of the computer and thinking about something for late evening dinner ...

If you start on a project you can't stop with working on it until it's done.

If something in your project won't seem to work you spend the rest of the time trying to get it fixed.

If it can't be fixed you discard the whole project because you can't handle the frustration of one of the things not working.

You ask 'Sorry what did you say?' a lot more than NT's, though you are not deaf in any physical form.

You remember things from your childhood that even your parents have forgotten.

Everything you do must have a purpose, without one you won't do it. (for example I never do my hair if I won't be going anywhere that day.)

When riding your bike you would like to be the only person on the road.

When riding your bike you will speed down when other people are approaching because you don’t want to pass them by or ride near to them.

Your family can’t eat an apple or chewing gum when you are in the same room because the sound annoys you and you’ll get pissed off about it.

The sound you produce yourself however, it can be anything, doesn’t bothers you at all.

While watching a movie you always recognise the actors and you state in which other movies they have played and as what character, you get over exited if the actor also starred in your special interest movie. (mine’s starwars, though I managed tone my obsession down to a normal level).

... if you went to Victoria and Albert Museum and write them the same day a letter that a silver porringer of labelled as "Augsburg ca. 1690" is in fact made 1688 and name the maker, his wife and the name of marker's children.

... if you can watch a historical film without spotting significant mistakes, like the wrong form of spoons for eating or the wrong name of a court.

... If in junior high, your science teacher asked who didn't know about the birds and the bees and you raise your hand because you didn't understand how birds have sex with bees.

so true, so true...

YMBAAI you have to watch movies several times and memorize what is wearing what in which scene so you can recognize the different characters. (and if they change their hair, all bets are off)

...you speak fluent Morse Code but can't carry on a simple conversation with your neighbor in English (or other language) and therefore resort to beeping at your neighbor trying to get your point across and after a few moments of quizzical stares from your neighbor you come to the conclusion that you are using the wrong frequency, correct your mistake and then proceed with the conversation with lower frequency beeps.

-go to class (College -paralegal studies), then when people ask me questions later, I basically recite the whole lecture to them and thoroughly explain the lesson in great deal as if Im the instructor.

-Do better than most of my classmates in my class during an open book exam, without even cracking open my lecture notes.

-spend most of my day on a computer.

-Have the 1000 yard stare and/or would rather look at the wall or look downward than make eye contact.

-very clumsy and managed to wreck 12 glass jars of spaghetti sauce when stocking shelves at the grocery store I worked at a year ago.

-I make jokes that are funny to me but not others.

-Im forgetful
-I go off to my own little world at times.
-I am permanently logged onto WP

When you got your report card, all your grades were A+
and all your behaviour marks were N - needs improvement.

Id be worried if colleges had "behaviour marks".

... or finishing the sentences of the teachers ...

LULZ that was me in 1st thru 3rd grade. Though I got bad grades then through HS due to not doing homework - and in some Math classes and Physics because I didn't "show the work" - I did the problem in my head and didn't know HOW to "show the work."