Critical of self diagnosis - you shouldn't be

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Thats fine. opinions are points.

But do you get the drift of what I am saying?
or are we about to start a new semantic debate about the Latin root of the word opinion?
if so I`m out.

What is wrong with a small survey? would it do any harm? could it help us move along a bit?

OK I am going to attempt to guide this debate onto a slightly more serious footing, to discuss wellbeing issues of people un diagnosed or self diagnosed with ASDs (this is in no way to exclude the `officially diagnosed please understand this).

While technical debates on the efficacy of self or official diagnosis are important, the bottom line is that people out there are suffering or struggling to find their way in a place where information is difficult to access and health care is very limited or too expensive.

As a result of this here in the UK apparently loneliness is becoming epidemic amongst young and old especially males. That is in the general population; so you can imagine what it is like for many of us with ASDs; it is well documented how our condition can lead to social isolation.

Additionally it has been estimated that suicidal ideation is 10 x more in Aspies than in the general population.
These are sobering thoughts.

So while you ask what I am trying to get at ... it is this...(and my argument may well be flawed but I still have a voice to say it)

ANY kind of help to increase self awareness is useful for some of us who were living off the map not understanding why we were like we were for decades.
Self diagnosis is a useful tool to give us some kind of map or framework to begin to understand why we work in a certain way. Even if it is wrong and it turns out that one person finds out it was PTSD and not aspergers...... so what? who is it harming? it is a step along the path for them.

I think it is important to question everything, but also to keep proactively searching not just defending the status quo and dismissing peoples hard fought understanding because it is not `technically correct`.
Personally I would like users to start calling the shots more, initiating debate amonst the mental health professionals, they need (and mostly want) our input.
I think we should work on giving everyone the benefit of the doubt if they self-diagnose and not attempt to restrict their place in the world using our standards.

Are we ultimately discussing how to improve peoples well being?

I’m on WP questioning the suspicion of an ASD label and learning about practical solutions to lifelong problems. All this talk of valid/invalid is something that does not currently impact on me, I have basic human needs issues to resolve while I’m learning all these new things about myself. What concerns me is the politics of WP, thank you to alex for clarifying the inclusionary ethos, as I am curious about the practical implications of this discussion on the participation of self diagnosed members.

Just one practical example of a personally *valid experience that stemmed from reading here and led to research; understanding my noise sensitivity issue has been liberating, I have stopped trying to desensitise myself through methods that I now consider self harm. No one is attempting to invalidate that reality, nor can they. Based on the deleted posts, only a minority take issue with this practical type of WP participation.
But, if I start an aspiegirl blog and self promote on youtube claiming to be representative of ASD women, reference WP or post a link here to share, the majority will take issue with this type of behaviour, because I do not have a valid diagnosis.
Two different approaches.
I have to point out the culturally differing expectations regarding diagnosis, and question if I have to achieve the valid/invalid diagnosis standard set by the privileged from wealthy progressive countries to participate as a *valid voice on this site? Or, is this support site actually inclusive of and a resource for those living in the bottom percentages of global wealth too?
Thank you to the anti self diagnosis group; I’m starting to appreciate how patient and tolerant many of you were. It’s better to have this culture out in the open.

Pretty much sums it up.

This place is starting to be pretty ultraorthotoxic...

A hidden threat has entered the community... A whole Illuminati of the elf-diagnosed... Be confirmed or condemned!

Does anyone know of another autism discussion group that is more compassionate towards self-diagnosis? where perhaps this type of criticism and debate is simply not permitted?

This arguing coming on top of the forum upgrade is really making me want to stop posting here altogether.

If anyone wants to start that poll about who wound up [b]right[/i], feel free to include my response.

I turned out to be "right." I got diagnosed two months ago after seven years of actually very painful and shocked suspicion that I seemed to have the traits of Asperger's.

Before I got handed that confirmation two months ago, trust me, I'd started out positively NOT "wanting to have it."

I'm not going to make this post much longer than it is, and I don't want to stay in this discussion after posting this -- indeed, I don't even like to come to WP anymore -- and that's AFTER being told I AM in fact one of you guys...

I'm one that "left" after being diagnosed positively rather than leaving because it was a negative. Why did I leave despite learning officially that I AM on the spectrum?

Because I became DISGUSTED at attitudes like the ones on this thread and other times like it when this stuff would come up even in a thread discussing something else. Because for the most of the year I was on here before being diagnosed, I ran into A LOT of "Well how can you give advice or say anything accurate when YOU are not yet diagnosed and don't even know for sure if you are on the spectrum?"

That's not an exact quote of anyone but it's near as dammit. It's the kind of thing some people have said to me even if I was just posting about shared experiences of meltdown or something. But because at that time I was self suspecting people wanted to invalidate anything I said at all about my experiences of traits that were autistic ones.

And, by the way, I did always insert the information, back then, that "I at present am only self-suspecting and not yet diagnosed" before going on to offer whatever I was trying to offer. But I was slyly beaten up in a covert way over and over on this place. One member in particular -- EVEN THOUGH I WAS COMPLETELY UPFRONT THAT I ONLY "SUSPECTED" -- actually seemed to follow me around injecting his cynicism into threads where I was.

And also, another thing, speaking strictly for myself.

I have NEVER suspected I was on the spectrum for purpose of "belonging" or fitting in OR making "excuses" for my life.

I have said this before and I'll say it again:

I stumbled upon the traits while not even thinking about my own self or my challenges. I ran across the traits not because I was some kind of hypochondriac looking for something to be wrong with me, or looking for an excuse for challenges and failings I had suffered all my life. I looked it up because a public figure revealed he had been diagnosed, and I thought that seemed surprising (because I knew nothing about it) and so I looked it up just to see what HE was dealing with.

And when I recognized myself in the most profound difficulties, no not just "Ooh yeah I'm socially awkward, a bit!" it was a shock, not a welcome thing. I spent the next SEVEN YEARS denying even the merest possibility to myself. It took a long process of denial then research then finally my diagnosis at the age of 52 (then) and I took none of it lightly.

When one of the best, most respected DIAGNOSED members here got handed a plateful of "I don't think you are on the spectrum" -- and not as a compliment, but in typical WP suspicion -- and this place is RIFE with members being suspicious of other members' diagnosis -- I'd had it. I didn't wanna be here anymore even WITH my newly minted diagnosis.

This post was going to be even longer than I'd intended and I just deleted a bunch of it because why the fck should I bother. Some of you people will never be satisfied.

Anyway, if you do that poll "How many thought they were then got the official diagnosis confirming they were right" count me as one. Even though yeah at the same time I also left WP following diagnosis.

Because I felt extremely vulnerable after my positive diagnosis.

Because I f*****g hate the tone on this place.

Thanks for posting that BirdInFlight. I really appreciate you for speaking up especially after having had bad experiences here. I'm sorry you had to go through that. I really hate to see other people being treated that way, even more so than I dislike experiencing it myself.

I understand the forum is in sort of a transition phase right now with the upgrade and some of the moderators leaving. But these things have been going on here for a long time. It's good to see Alex step in and comment.

BirdInFlight, I'm with you. I wasn't looking to have autism either. I discovered this about myself accidentally and I went through two years of denial. I received my formal diagnosis two weeks ago.

After reading these self diagnosis threads, I am ready to leave and not look back. Such threads should be prohibited

Last edited by Bookmaker on 30 Nov 2014, 12:58 pm, edited 1 time in total.

It's sad to read that people feel the need to leave WP just because of the attitudes of a few.

And the guilt-tripping begins.

I have no desire to see BirdInFlight leave, but I am not changing my opinions to make her happier either. I'm not repeating my earlier thoughts in this thread because there's no point, but I stand by them.

Shut it, you f*****g idiot! If I want to say something in support of people then I will.

I just want to be clear I don't think there was anything wrong in starting this thread. If you go back to the OP I think it's an attempt to be proactive about the criticism that happens here on a regular basis. Not so much to incite people into MORE criticism. But unfortunately some posters respond to it that way because they misunderstand that nuance and/or just think they are absolutely entitled to criticize no matter what.

It is bizarre to want a forum where a certain topic should not be discussed or a certain opinion stated.
That mentality, I don't understand.

No one wants you to change your opinion, but you could be more respectful in the way you express your opinions. You are by far one of the most belligerent posters I have ever seen here. You've personally attacked several posters including Skibum and Joe90 who did absolutely nothing to warrant it. You have also made it clear that you don't care how others feel and you're going to say whatever you want regardless of how it affects anyone.

You have been getting by with it here because people feel bad for you and the circumstances you are in, but you are unwilling to extend the same kind of consideration to anyone else. Having a little guilt, in the sense of humility might be necessary here.

btbnnyr, it's not that people want to forbid certain topics, it's just that this topic boils down to so much biting and nipping at people who come her to find help. This is the thing that bothers me about it, I don't care if people don't believe I have Autism, nobody knows me, people have their own lives to think about, it's non-issue. What bothers me is the fact that we turn against each other here, instead of toward each other. I don't mean that in a smalzy huggy way, but just as humans who could be coming together instead of falling apart. Hope that made sense.

I didn't see any of the posters arguing against self-diagnosis or not sure about self-diagnosis insulting others, using curse words, mocking others, telling people to burn in hell, or suggesting that someone is a psychopath. These negative behaviors, I am seeing from some posters who support self-diagnosis and want others not to discuss an important issue on a forum without a rule prohibiting such discussion.