Are you proud of having Asperger's?

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That's much better, thanks, TheDoctor82.

Not really. I heard a ''message'' in their tone of voice (yes, I can understand tone of voice). The message was, ''we're all normal, we all have friends, you're the weird one, and always will be!'' And they wouldn't have said that if it wasn't true, simply because they didn't say it to anyone else. I saw them sitting with loads of other girls, and they all gloated when they saw me on my own, (which was what they wanted to see). And I just walked out of school that day muttering, ''if I didn't have this AS they wouldn't be treating me like this!''
They weren't exactly bullying me - they were just not including me because they thought that only girls who have a few social skills are important.

I've read somewhere that humans are social creatures, and if you can't be social then you're completely f****d.

And these are the type of people you'd rather be like?

Ok, let's put the shoe on the other foot for a minute: if you had the opportunity to be in their shoes, and treat other people the way they're treating you--all the while being as miserably as they obviously are deep down--would you want that? Would you like to go thru life making a total ass of yourself, and treating everyone else like crap? Do you think you'd be happy/proud with yourself as a human being?

Well, that thing you read is common belief, but don't forget that it was written by people who also depend on that as well.

It almost sounds like you're trying to live life by their mindset. Trust me...there's a reason it hasn't gotten you very far; in fact there are several reasons for it ':B-)

I'm not saying I want to treat other people horribly - I'm saying I want to be socially accepted properly.

Anyway - all Aspies think that just because NTs ain't got a disability, they are ''normal'', and so pushing odd people like me out of their lives or just being aquatances with them must be ''normal''.

I am not proud that I have AS. End of story.

Is anyone here proud of having blonde hair or being tall?

ruveyn

Neither am I - I thoroughly hate having it, and I do not know why some brains have to be built in a Aspergers way. This is my only life I'll ever get, and yet I'm spending it struggling with mundane things. I can't even work full-time because I get emotionally worn out, and I would really love to work with small children in a nursery but I can't because I'm obsessively phobic with picking up tummy bugs from them (because small children do pick up tummy bugs more than most adults and teenagers I know), and the reason why I'm extremely phobic about picking up a tummy bug is probably due to my very high anxiety. If I never had this Aspergers, picking up tummy bugs might not worry me so much, whether I am phobic or not.
Also I can't work in a shop because I wouldn't be able to cope with demanding customers, and I don't want to work in a factory because apparently they don't have proper windows to let the sunlight in, and I'd go mad if I'm working somewhere all day and can't even see the daylight (and daylight is the only thing what puts me in a good mood), so even looking for a job is limited because of my extreme anxiety. And I dread starting work anyway because I have social phobia, and being ''the new person'' is a very big strain on me and my confidence, especially with strangers, and they might start judging me and I'm scared my first impression might go wrong, and I'll be giving out vibes that I'm ''weird'' before I've barely started the work..... Oh, this Aspergers gets me into such a dilemma.

I WANT TO BE NT!! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!

Dude, get off your computer and do something with your life. Autism isn't something that can be cured; you're stuck with it.

I don't like having Asperger's either, but I at least try to do something other than whining about it on the Internet. Take a class in something you like, teach yourself how to play the guitar or use Photoshop, participate in NaNoWriMo, just do something other than feeling sorry for yourself.

I know you're trying to be helpful but there could be a hundred reasons as to why I hate having AS, not just because you think I haven't got a life, because I try my hardest. I do a lot more than what I thought I'd be able to do. I'm on job-seekers but I actually do get off my arse and busy myself doing voluntry work at a charity shop EVERY DAY (except Sunday and some Thursdays). And my NT cousin (who is also on job-seekers) wouldn't get out of bed and go somewhere to work for nothing - she'll rather lay in bed all day then whinge because she's bored and lonely. And when I'm not at the charity shop I go around giving my CV to places where I'll feel comfortable working at. AND I've passed my driving test a few weeks ago, which is a big acheivement, but I can't afford to get a car yet until I find myself a job. And on Sundays I like to spend the day doing some cooking, like making cakes or cookies for my family (who come round on a sunday evening), which gives me something to do. So I keep myself pretty busy throughout the week for christ sake - I'm not just sitting around at home on the computer, I only go on the computer in the evenings which is my only relaxation. And I even feel pretty proud of myself going on these forums expressing my feelings and opinions on things, because even just 2 years ago I used to scream if somebody mentions AS to me, and now I'm talking about it every night to people I don't know, however much I hate having it.
So don't start lecturing me to get a life when you don't know me or any of my circumstances in my life - I have a lot more worries with my family members, for example my own nan (who I love) is ill with Alzheimer's, and the situation is a lot worse than you think. And it's no good just saying, ''oh stick her in a home and get on with your life'' because that is not helpful either. These forums are just to discuss our strengths and weaknesses and other Aspergers-related stuff, not to be lecturing eachother. It's nice to have some encouragement from other Aspies, but I don't like being told to do something with my life when the least I'm doing is trying to get out there and meet different people and experience different things.
What I do may not be much but it's better than nothing at all.

But doing all these things don't make my anxieties go away. I can't just sweep it all under the rug and magically transform into a happy NT. I'll always be an anxious person no matter how hard I try, and I'll always hate having AS because there sometimes comes a time where the AS laughs at me, and other times I am able to push it to one side. Sometimes I feel proud of myself and forget about having AS, and other times it's right there in my face, and when I think too deeply about it I get all het up about it, because I envy all my cousins for knowing the social cues. It is practically normal to sometimes get a little jealous. But the important thing is - I am going out there doing things with my life. I've even signed up for a computer course to help with my language skills and maybe meeting a few friends (if they don't end up bullying me like my last friends did. But that's hardly my fault).

By the way - I have taught myself playing the keyboard. I've composed all my songs onto a tape. It's talent.

Last edited by Joe90 on 25 Oct 2010, 5:21 pm, edited 5 times in total.

I am no more proud of having Asperger's than I am of having blue eyes. They're both things that I can't change; I was born with it, there's not a way to turn it off, and that's all there is to it.

I think you're missing the point: what does it say about being accepted by the people that treat you like crap?

Would you consider it worth the time of minorities to try getting the acceptance of the KKK?

Would it be worth it for a guy who doesn't do drugs to try getting acceptance from a group of stoners?

Do you see where I'm going with this?

Why do you think aspies are better? I don't think NTs are better, I just think I, personally, would be better off as NT.

Because an Autistic mind has the power to "think outside the box" and find patterns and details in information that almost anyone else would've easily overlooked.

We have a level of loyalty to others that they could never understand--and I assure you they...haven't even tried.

I mean, I'm sure it's easy to say what you're saying if you haven't learned how to use what you have to your advantage yet. Trust me: once you learn how to use what you have, you'll be glad you have it

That must be hard, .

I don't really think outside the box that often.

Don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not under the impression you've actively learned to use any traits that come with Autism to your advantage yet.

But when you do, you'll be mighty impressed with the results