Your techniques for faking "proper" social interac

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I think it is important to think about it all. And question: how much contact do you want with people? What sort of conversations do you want to have? What sort of person are you? I think it helps to decide how you want to be with people.. that can take a lot of thinking and experimentation though. But there is not a one size fits all method for getting along with NTs.

I don't really understand the question.

How I interact is how I interact, and there's nothing fake about it.

I used to work in retail and would have to interact with the public daily. It was fine as long as they were asking questions about what they were looking for, but I tended to struggle with customers that would attempt small talk. Whenever someone tried to engage me in small talk (either at work or if I was out walking my dog or whatever), I would either give noncommittal replies at the appropriate times ("huh," "really?" "wow," etc.) or would fake an answer to keep the conversation going like they wanted. When asked questions like "hey, how about that game last night?" I would usually reply with something like "yeah, wasn't that something?" even though I'm not a sports fan and have no clue as to what game they're even referring to.

Now that I'm married, my wife has given me some tips to help me out. In the past, whenever I was asked a question like "are you married?' I would simply say "yes." (They asked me a yes or no question, and I gave them the information they were looking for, without elaborating.) I told my wife that people would get annoyed that I wasn't contributing to the conversation and felt like they were wanting my whole life story from that one question. ("Why, yes! I've been married to my lovely wife Amber for almost 6 years! We have 3 children and a dog! Blah blah, blah-blah blah-blah.....") She told me that's not what I'm supposed to do, and that people actually want to talk about themselves, so when I'm asked a question, I should answer it like I usually do, and then turn it around back on them. ("Yes, I am married, are you?")

1) Let the other person approach me and speak to me first. That way I can effectively respond to what they’ve said previously. Learn to reciprocate to what the other person says. This minimises any possible confrontation. I’ve learnt the hard way that I can come across as domineering (even when I don’t mean to be) if I approach the other person first.

2) Let the other person talk about his/herself as much as possible. Praise the other person sparingly in a sincere manner, if s/he deserves it.

3) Find convenient objects/organisms in the immediate physical environment to talk about. For instance: the fine spring weather; the washing machine; the lighting fixtures. If the person has an animal with them, enquire politely about the animal: how old it is; what breed; ask politely if you can pet it/give it a treat etc.

4) Creatively construct a metaphor/joke about the object/topic/interest and relate it back to the conversation. This requires skill to pull off. Only my close friends/those with highly visual thinking styles have reacted positively to this kind of unusual talk. Relate the metaphor back to the other person in a positive way. Sometimes things come out strange and funny when I’m stumped for things to say. People don’t seem to like me talking this unique, object orientated way much any more.

5) Talk about the activity/task at hand. Ask about the itinerary/meeting times. Ask about the equipment/machinery needed to perform the task/activity. Ask how things are done. Ask how many items will be needed. Ask for clarification of any important and/or safety procedures. Ask the person if s/he enjoys a hobby and how often s/he do a hobby.

6) Rehearse any “errand” questions and scripts in my mind beforehand. If I’m asked to fetch something/someone, I state the name of the person who sent me on the errand (if required), and what my business is. I speak as concisely as possible.

7) Remember the basic “Ps and Qs” (pleases and thank yous) and be as polite as possible.
Remember basic “restaurant talk” when asking for and receiving help/things, such as:
“May I…?”
“I’d be grateful if…”
“Excuse me.”
“Thank you.”
I’ve actually been told I sound to formal many times, but this is to try and ensure that I don’t come across as rude.