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Who notices you're different?
Everyone, sooner or later 57%  57%  [ 57 ]
Only very close people 9%  9%  [ 9 ]
The occasional person 5%  5%  [ 5 ]
Most people 21%  21%  [ 21 ]
Other 8%  8%  [ 8 ]
Total votes : 100

MathGirl
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18 Oct 2009, 6:12 pm

Roman wrote:
Everyone notice I am different right away, if I walk passed them and they are complete strangers. If I look in the mirror it is very obvious I am different. I don't have to DO anything wrong just the way I look like is very different. I don't konw what to point to though. Logic says that if it is not about behavior, it has to be with something physical, like having my face deformed. But it isn't -- I can't think of a single physical parameter about me that is different. Yet, if you take photo of me it looks quite a bit different.

Wow, I was going to say the exact same thing. I can't pass for a 100 percent normal person, whatever normal is, even if I try really hard. There's always something I do that makes me stand out instantly. Not in a bad way, not in a good way, just... different. People often tell me that I'm emotionless. My body language is clumsy. The volume and the tone of my voice often comes out wrong. I remember talking to a friend at WalMart and seeing people stare at me, but I could never figure out what I was doing wrong. I don't even go shopping much anymore, but if I do, I always feel very lost and confused there. I end up going to wrong aisles, touching random stuff, stopping and staring at things that catch my attention, bumping into people, and generally feeling very awkward. I guess it's because of all the visuals and the noise being all around me, my mind becomes all over the place.


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18 Oct 2009, 6:25 pm

One of these things, is not like the other topic

I do not even try to be "normal" anymore, not for many years. And i feel better because of it. But I do notice that it is everyone, sooner or later.

I am eating a delicious fresh soup right now (as we speak) I just finished making from scratch. :P


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Roman
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18 Oct 2009, 6:35 pm

MathGirl wrote:
Roman wrote:
Everyone notice I am different right away, if I walk passed them and they are complete strangers. If I look in the mirror it is very obvious I am different. I don't have to DO anything wrong just the way I look like is very different. I don't konw what to point to though. Logic says that if it is not about behavior, it has to be with something physical, like having my face deformed. But it isn't -- I can't think of a single physical parameter about me that is different. Yet, if you take photo of me it looks quite a bit different.

Wow, I was going to say the exact same thing. I can't pass for a 100 percent normal person, whatever normal is, even if I try really hard. There's always something I do that makes me stand out instantly. Not in a bad way, not in a good way, just... different. People often tell me that I'm emotionless. My body language is clumsy. The volume and the tone of my voice often comes out wrong. I remember talking to a friend at WalMart and seeing people stare at me, but I could never figure out what I was doing wrong. I don't even go shopping much anymore, but if I do, I always feel very lost and confused there. I end up going to wrong aisles, touching random stuff, stopping and staring at things that catch my attention, bumping into people, and generally feeling very awkward. I guess it's because of all the visuals and the noise being all around me, my mind becomes all over the place.


Yes I can definitely relate to body postures being clumsy. My body postures are very clumsy as well, which is one way in which I stand off. My voice is very monotone, but loud. As far as body postures I won't say they are emotionless; probably the opposite, the emotions are very exagerated. So if I smile it would be a really big smile, if I am may be slightly upset that I don't even know about it would come off as a huge pout. If I stare at someone I would REALLY stare at them; if I think about something and space out, it would look like I am purposely staring at the ceiling in order to draw attention to myself.

When you said "the volume and tone of your voice comes out wrong" do you mean it is too loud? In my case, it is. It often happens when I talk in crouded places ppl look over. Few times I was actually told to lower my voice or stop talking. Is it what happens to you?

You mentioned that it is the "visuals and noise around you" that makes you do that? So, if you were not in the store but walking down the street, would you be able to pass off as normal? In my case I don't have sensory issues, so for me it is just the way I always am, whether it be store or not.



MathGirl
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18 Oct 2009, 6:46 pm

Roman wrote:
Yes I can definitely relate to body postures being clumsy. My body postures are very clumsy as well, which is one way in which I stand off. My voice is very monotone, but loud. As far as body postures I won't say they are emotionless; probably the opposite, the emotions are very exagerated. So if I smile it would be a really big smile, if I am may be slightly upset that I don't even know about it would come off as a huge pout. If I stare at someone I would REALLY stare at them; if I think about something and space out, it would look like I am purposely staring at the ceiling in order to draw attention to myself.

When you said "the volume and tone of your voice comes out wrong" do you mean it is too loud? In my case, it is. It often happens when I talk in crouded places ppl look over. Few times I was actually told to lower my voice or stop talking. Is it what happens to you?

You mentioned that it is the "visuals and noise around you" that makes you do that? So, if you were not in the store but walking down the street, would you be able to pass off as normal? In my case I don't have sensory issues, so for me it is just the way I always am, whether it be store or not.
I'm emotionless when I'm very concentrated on one thought in my head. Sometimes I space out when sitting in class. I often stim, with no expression on my face, repeating a thought in my head until I catch myself doing it and stop.
Yes, my voice is often very loud. Usually, if I'm talking about something I'm interested in, or trying to convince someone to do something, my voice is very loud. However, if I have to talk about my emotions, or say something meaningless like do small talk or saying "please" or "thank you", my voice is extremely quiet and I may end up mumbling.
About the visuals and noise, I don't think they necessarily make me come across as awkward, it's just difficult for me to put the tasks that I have to do in order with all the stimuli around me. I become distracted easily. I might forget a binder in class when packing up, or it might take me longer to pack up when many people are talking, because I end up listening to their conversations instead of focusing on the tasks that I need to accomplish.


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18 Oct 2009, 7:17 pm

MathGirl wrote:
I'm emotionless when I'm very concentrated on one thought in my head. Sometimes I space out when sitting in class. I often stim, with no expression on my face, repeating a thought in my head until I catch myself doing it and stop.


I can totally relate to this. My version of stim in such a situation would be biting on my pen.

MathGirl wrote:
Yes, my voice is often very loud. Usually, if I'm talking about something I'm interested in, or trying to convince someone to do something, my voice is very loud.


Same here! Its funny some people don't realize the connection, and think I raise my voice because I am angry. To me, it is SOOO natural that if I am interested in a topic and/or want to convince someone of it, then my voice goes up, that it is so hard to believe that there is anyone who can't relate.

MathGirl wrote:
However, if I have to talk about my emotions, or say something meaningless like do small talk or saying "please" or "thank you", my voice is extremely quiet and I may end up mumbling.


When I say please or thank you on my own (which happens very rarely) I say it in okay voice. But, in a more frequent scenario, when my mom is the one who tells me to say please or thank you, I would say it quietly, partly because it is meaningless, and partly because I feel awkward saying something because someone just asked me to.

So how about you? In the situation you describe, do either of your parents ask you to say please or thank you? Do you ever say it on your own?

MathGirl wrote:
About the visuals and noise, I don't think they necessarily make me come across as awkward, it's just difficult for me to put the tasks that I have to do in order with all the stimuli around me. I become distracted easily. I might forget a binder in class when packing up, or it might take me longer to pack up when many people are talking, because I end up listening to their conversations instead of focusing on the tasks that I need to accomplish.


I am also getting disracted easilly. I guess in my case I usually get disracted in response to my own thoughts rather than outside stimuli. But I guess the outside stimuli might do if, say, I am in the store and I am really hungry.



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18 Oct 2009, 7:26 pm

Roman wrote:
So how about you? In the situation you describe, do either of your parents ask you to say please or thank you? Do you ever say it on your own?
Yeah, my parents always ask me to say "please" and "thank you"! I don't feel like saying these words at home, because I don't think about how I come across, but in public I make sure that I say these words whenever it's necessary.


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18 Oct 2009, 7:58 pm

Spokane_Girl wrote:
Pretty much everyone once they know me.


^ This.


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18 Oct 2009, 8:24 pm

Everyone, sooner or later. But More sooner.


I have had ones from other online web forums let me know by the way I post. lol
In SL (Second Life) a online world to. I can not get away from it I am just different :D








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18 Oct 2009, 10:48 pm

Greentea wrote:
I ask because in spite of all my lifelong efforts, there's no way I can pass for "normal". However, I see some people here mention that it's all a question of learning. If they're right, then I'm a bad learner, I guess.


I like this question and it's a tough one.

There is no way of knowing if everyone I have ever met thinks I am different (sounds nicer than weird doesn't it).

I am convinced that MOST people do, which is how I voted, but I am keeping an open mind as to whether the answer really IS 'everyone I have EVER met' :wink:


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18 Oct 2009, 10:56 pm

I think most of the time it's fairly obvious.



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19 Oct 2009, 12:45 am

everybody sooner or later



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19 Oct 2009, 12:58 am

For me I dont really know whether people see me as normal or not. It highly depends on the person. For the people that actually get to know me, they know I am not normal for the most part. I have the impression that people probably see me might see me as just really reserved and shy. I've been trying a lot harder to come across as normal lately. Me being normal is often bland and boring. I perfer show my eccentric side(where I say a lot of random/weird crap) which is a lot more interesting. I dont get many opportunities to show that lately. Lifes been quite boring lately.



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19 Oct 2009, 1:51 am

I can act "normal". I can fool an average person for about 3 hours. After that, I become exhausted and start making mistakes.

Even before I start making mistakes, I can almost see the other person growing uneasy and trying to find some rational explanation to what he/she perceives as incongruity in behavior.



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19 Oct 2009, 3:22 am

I don't know anymore...



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19 Oct 2009, 3:27 am

People usually just think that I'm quiet.

If I start talking, then they generally just think that I'm a bit eccentric.

It's very rare for them to think that I'm "weird".



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19 Oct 2009, 3:48 am

Willard wrote:
"Do I LOOK like a @#&! People Person!?"


:lol: I want that T-shirt!