one way to tell if you have autism or not.

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When was little I quite obviously fit the "active-but-odd" label some more talkative aspies get, which is how I got an ADD diagnosis when I was 6.

I don't have any videos but I have tons of pics, including one of me doing the stereotypical "lining things up" behavior and walking on my toes.

I presented as a typical, textbook aspie as a little kid. Pictures of me don't necessarily show this, but the many videos taken of me do. Some examples:

1) Where my mom points to individual flags on a poster of "flags of many lands" and I name all of them...at the age of three/four.

2) The logo video. My special interest at the time was TV logos and I requested that my mom make a video of me displaying pictures of all my favorite logos. She was also kind enough to tape them off the television for me.

3) Many videos of me reciting dialogue from commercials/videos/tv shows.

There still exist 8mm silent movies of me as a child, but I have not seem them in 25+ years.

But I remember some of them, because I used to watch them over and over again as an older child on an editor console.

One in particular stands out in my mind: Christmas morning when I was about 3 or 4--caught descending the stairs halfway, blinking at all the commotion, then turning around to go back up to my room.

There is one video of me at my sisters third birthday. I'm almost mute in it and clutching to my mum. In many photos of me around 6 or 7 I'm either crying on or latching onto my mum like a baby koala. There's a pretty clear picture of me as a toddler and it looks like I'm stimming with my fingers.
I think the whole lining things up, crying when going to a new location then crying when we had to leave said location, and a lack of interest in having friends points clearly to autism.

I have videos of me as a one year old and as a 9 year old.

As a one year old, I was sifting dirt through a toy repeatedly. I did also smile.

As a 9 year old, I was very hyper, and very inappropriate. I wanted the camera on me. I had no inhibitions at that point. I was not behaving appropriately for my age, and unaware of my own body. I also insisted that those around me act things out correctly in front of the camera, when I was in the mood for it. Later video, of 13 or so, showed where I was lacking in personal care. I was not wearing a bra, but should have been. My hair was often messy.

I was a very obsessive, controlling, and odd child. I would spend hours arranging my pet cemetery. I would research my interests, and insist that other children play correctly. However, before I was teased, I was not anti-social. I wanted very much to fit in, but couldn't. The fact that I can't still causes depression today.

All of my photos from when i was a kid show me with my face screwed up wailing because i hated the glare of the sun due to light sensitivity issues. I have a woeful memory so cant remember too much about my behaviour or interactions.

No videos of me either. I have a very good recall of many things from back then. I wonder if my parents were really honest about my life and their observations, how "strange" would they admit to finding my behavior.

//I don't have any videos but stories told by elders work just as well I think. //

Weeel - I have one elder told me one story. Though to be fair I think that one is relevant.

Photos show little - except that around 1 I was happy and interested and around 3 I was troubled. After which my photos show that I was careful not to show anything.

I only have photos which show it in some respects like vacant expression or in group photo I tend to stand out in most cases like elbows pointed up with hands cupping the tops of my eyes to shield out the bright sunlight and squinting or wincing a lot while everyone else is standing normally for the photo or as a teen outside I was sitting on the ground looking down while others were standing for the group photo. I found that rather odd but I hardly need photos as my memory is very reliable and my mother noticed and always said I was very different from her other kids from the day I was born. Didn't smile, didn't talk much, repetitive speech when I did talk, holding me was like holding a sack of potatoes, I didn't latch on or hold on, she couldn't get any response from me, appeared to be deaf and didn't respond to my name when called at two years old...the list goes on and on and I recall a lot of stand out/noticeable issues especially when I started kindergarten onward with school and social situations, memory skills, a lot of sensory issues around touch or feel especially and light and sound, etc. I don't think a video would be more reliable than my memory and my mothers accounts but photos do reveal it as well to some extent.

I have a report of my diagnosis. It mentions some important things. When I was a baby I slept a lot. My mother says she could just lay me down and I would sleep for hours, not needing any attention. I think that this made her happy. Also, at the time of my evaluation I would not make eye-contact and be fixated on objects. When it was time to play I would choose things I could play with myself. I also liked constructive toys (Lego, Duplo, Bionicle) a lot and I would play with them endlessly in my room. In the classroom I would be 'invisible' and I wouldn't have motivation for my work. I also sometimes randomly spurted out facts. I still don't well know how to keep a conversation going.

There is a video of me floating around in the basement somewhere, but I watched it a year ago. It was me when I was seven watching my favorite cartoons. Mom (narrator and holder of camera) is practically yelling at me to catch my attention. In the end, she had to make me face the camera before I was aware of being yelled at. I still tend to hyper focus if I'm really enjoying a show or activity.

That's something my mother repeated to me endlessly, about how I had gotten my days and nights mixed up. It must have bothered her or seemed very significant as she said it all the time.