Family thinks pursuing diagnosis is pointless

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Another reason to get a proper diagnosis, is so that you don't wind up with a misdiagnosis of a treatable disorder, and start taking prescriptions that you don't need and which do you no good (and in some cases do active harm - Ritalin is a godsend to many people who actually have ADHD, but a curse to those whose other conditions are dismissed with an ADHD label).

If your mom doesn't have AS herself, how could she possibly understand? You have to do what's right for yourself. Is it worth it for YOU to get a diagnosis? Are you having problems in your everyday life which you think might be related to AS?

Yeah, a lot of people diagnosed with AS think that very thing as well, at least in the beginning. Then as they come to understand what the disorder actually is and all that it entails in affecting the elements of their daily life, they suddenly begin to realize that's its been affecting them far more than they ever realized. That it isn't 'mild' at all, it just seems that way because you've spent your entire life being told that there's nothing wrong with you, you're just 'shy' and 'stubborn' and 'lazy'. In other words, you don't have a brain dysfunction, you're just a defective personality.

Don't let them feed you that 'mild' crap. That's just downplaying the very real symptoms of a very real disability in order to blame you personally for being different. Just because your handicap is effectively invisible doesn't make it any less real. And since you will be discriminated against, bullied and abused for it your entire life, the least they can do is acknowledge that it is in fact an F'ing disability.

Besides, an individual's degree of functionality can fluctuate quite a bit during different stages of their life, so what might seem 'mild' by an outside observer now, could be much more debilitating down the road. There might come a time when you need to seek assistance even if you don't need it now, and don't let anyone tell you you can't qualify, because that's BS, too.

The best bit about getting a diagnosis is scoring some good drugs from your doctor. (The best drugs are the amphetamine-type ones for ADHD and benzodiazepines for anxiety.)

But for AS, there are no recommended drugs at all. Even if you want a straightforward SSRI you have to get a separate diagnosis of depression etc.

Yes, they are open to talking about it. I'm just not quite sure what to talk about. I have talked to them (mostly my mom) about why I think I have it. She has said it's probably because she has worked with kids with AS, she usually sees the more extreme cases of it and it's just hard for her to imagine me fitting into the same category as them. I don't think I've met any of her AS kids...just some diagnosed with autism, ones that are non-verbal.

That is the one thing I've thought of, but no doctor/psychologist/whoever seems to understand that logic. I've had a couple psychologists talk about diagnoses I fit, but not actually diagnose me. Just stuff like generalized anxiety disorder or obsessive compulsive disorder (I don't agree with that one, actually). But I have been given some anti-anxiety medications (I have one now that I not taking), anti-depressants (taking prozac now, thinking of weaning off it), and ritalin (that's for fatigue, though). I'm pretty comfortable taking meds, but I'm uncomfortable with doctors throwing around names of psychological disorders that I don't think I have when there is a neurological condition I very well might have. (If that makes sense, lol.)

I've thought of that, but I've also had some who think if I get the diagnosis I'll start just 'picking up' the traits of AS. (Since I already know a lot about the traits, I don't really follow that but whatever.) Is it necessarily a good thing to realize you've been affected more than you realized? Or are you saying in the sense that once you understand how it's affecting you, you can understand what to work on/if there are things you need to work on.

can't you still go for it? it must be hard without their support but it's not totally un-doable. i think if its important for you to find out whether you're on the spectrum, you should follow it through, even if it's by yourself.

Hi there, as a parent of a 14yo with an ASD diagnosis, my opinion is that the diagnosis is a tool that can be used to help you accomplish things. In my son's case, it gave us a word/phrase that we could use to start informing ourselves. We also used the diagnosis to develop educational strategies. After the fact-finding mission was well underway, we then used the diagnosis to help get my son extra services and accomodations in school. As far as what use it will be in the future, I'm not sure but I know that others here can weigh in on that. So my suggestion is, if you can accomplish your goals just fine, then a formal diagnosis may not be very useful. If your goal is to get to know yourself better, then a diagnosis may be very helpful. If you are struggling to accomplish academic goals, then a diagnosis may be helpful. It may or may not be helpful in getting a job. But, IMHO, that's all a diagnosis is, a tool. What you do with it is up to you and possibly your family. Best of luck

Yes, even though we aren't totally on the same page they have made it clear that if it would help me in some way to get the diagnosis then they are supportive of that. Sorry, I guess wasn't too clear. I guess what my thinking is at this point is should I go for it just because I've been pondering over it for so long, or should I drop it because of points others have brought up...when people ask why I pursued a diagnosis I don't want to be like "uh geez, I dunno."

I'm planning to go back to the neuropsych already, so I will talk with him about process of diagnoses, estimated cost/insurance stuff, if diagnosis is beneficial to me, etc. I'm fairly sure it's something I would like to just go ahead and do. Thanks for all the replies, I didn't expect so many

Maybe...I'm perhaps not the best person to answer that, since I was diagnosed so late in life, it was a bit too late for 'working on things' - what a younger person might get from 'behavioral therapies' or social skills workshops, I just learned in the school of hard knocks by trial and error, and it leaves me believing that you can only shave so many of the square edges off an Aspie peg to try to get it to fit in the round NT hole. Fitting in well enough that no one suspects you have an ASD is still a long way from functioning smoothly in a social work environment.

What I mean by realizing you've been affected all along more than you ever knew is simply that I now have a clearer picture of my disability and the role it has played in my entire life. Now I understand why I was always the oddball, the creative freethinker that could never function by everybody else's rules (even when I knew I HAD TO).

After going through 29 jobs in 33 years and being fired from 24 of those, I finally could point to something and say "See - its not because I'm a useless schmuck - I actually have a handicap!" Not only that, but that feeling all those years that I was being unfairly discriminated against just for being different suddenly made sense - and it was true! At some point you have to turn to those people who don't want to face your disability and insist that they acknowledge it, because denying it will not make it go away nor lessen it's impact on your life.

As for 'picking up' traits and behaviors - once again, the people who say things like that are trying to downplay your handicap and pretend you don't really have a disability, or that you barely have one. The lawyer who filed my SSDI claim asked me if my symptoms had gotten worse since diagnosis, because he understood that sometimes happened. I thought he was crazy, but I think now I know what he was referring to. No, my Autistic behaviors did not 'get worse' - as I began to accept who I was, who I have always been and realize how much of a mask I had been forced to hold together on a moment-by-moment basis my entire life - the mask began to crumble. I finally felt, after over forty years, that I just didn't have to pretend anymore to be like everybody else - hell, I was never any good at it anyway. So did my Autistic behaviors get 'worse'? No - I just dropped the NT 'act'.

I probably have better eye contact than most with AS because for so many years I was told I HAD to. My father insisted when I was still a child that no one would ever respect or take me seriously if I didn't look them in the eye, so I did it, even though it made me feel naked and stressed. So while my eye contact is still better than the average Aspie, I no longer feel like I HAVE to make myself miserably uncomfortable just to please everybody else. I give them only a much as is necessary to let them know I'm not ignoring them. So to others, some 'traits' might seem more pronounced than before the DX, but that's not the Aspie getting worse, that's the fake NT act disappearing. And its a weight off my shoulders.