I don't understand revenge

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Oh dear. Lets not discuss religion in THIS thread.

I understand the concept of revenge, but I don't understand how it helps anything. I think if you continue to seek revenge on one another it just keeps going on in a circular fashion.

I understand and am all for revenge.

If someone does something wrong to you, they need to be taught a lesson. Or else they are going to do it to you again, and again, and again..

When the proper authorities won't take care of justice, then you may need to do it yourself.

Or you could keep getting stepped on. Your decision.

I live for revenge, especially against people who mess with me for no reason.

Since I lean strongly towards determinism, revenge is never rational to me.


Might as well seek revenge on a grizzly bear for mauling your wife.


Revenge is probably little more than a rationalized fight-or-flight response and that has it's origins in the limbic system.

The rationalized aspect of it is based on the implicit belief in free will.

X is hurt by Y.
X hurts Y.
X becomes proud for standing up for himself.
X feels better.

Better now?

Deterrence and vengeance are not the same thing. Seems this confuses a lot of you.

Deterrence - preventing bad people doing bad things.

Vengeance - enjoying yourself doing it.

I think revenge, deterrence and retribution are all much the same thing. It's human nature to try to condition others not to hurt you, and it kind of works, though it's not without its problems, which I guess is why the "love your enemy" philosphy also commands a lot of respect.

If somebody hurts me and I hurt them back, I sometimes get a lot of satisfaction out of it. Often it's pretty low-key stuff, you pull the dog's whiskers, it growls, you pull his whiskers again, till eventually he nips you. I try to be like that dog, using the doctrine of minimum force. It's tempting to just cut through the niceties and kick ass at the start, and I'm sure it feels great, but I seem to prefer to hammer myself into the "reasonable" mould because it's usually wiser. I like films in which the underdog turns the tables on the bullies and punishes them. I like to see bullies get their come-uppance. I don't see anything wrong with dishing out a verbal put-down to somebody who has just done the same to me.......if a performer gets a heckler, it's good if he puts the heckler in his place with a well-chosen snipe.

I think a lot of people actually want their associates to have the bottle to defend themselves against them......if you try to be too accommodating they won't respect you. If you make it known you have combat skills and aren't afraid to use them, they'll like you. Strangely, when I showed I was capable of standing up to my first wife's insulting behaviour, although she accepted it and felt closer to me, I couldn't quite cope with the fact that it had come to such a thing, and felt it to be a sign of the relationship having turned bad.......really I wanted somebody who wouldn't have forced me to turn nasty in the first place, I always wanted all the conflicts resolving by calm, sincere reconciliation, not by push and shove, so the idea that she wouldn't do X to me because she knew I'd do Y to her wasn't quite what I was looking for. I wanted somebody who wouldn't do X to me because they knew that X would hurt me, and so I wouldn't need to get tough. But I don't think many people are interested in that level of peace and harmony, or they just can't get their behaviour anywhere near it.

I think there are a few people in this thread that's confusing standing up for oneself, and being vengeful. They're not the same thing. Being assertive is a good thing. It lets people know where they stand, and everyone has clear boundaries. Revenge, or being vengeful is where you coldly, and deliberately hurt a person in some way all the while knowing that you're hurting them, and further enjoying their pain. Males usually use some form of violence, whereas females usually retaliate with emotions; ie setting someone up to be totally humiliated in front of a large/important group of people. I don't understand this sort of thing either, and when I see someone engaging in this type of behavior I lose all respect for them.

Exactly. And what happens after you hurt the person? You feel better for ruining someone too?

I don't know what can be gained by revenge, really, except if you take someone's money, or something like that. But just to hurt them, seems kind of pointless, really.

I understand revenge as part of human survival instincts to protect oneself (first and foremost, honestly I'll admit I think I typically protect myself first & would guess (but don't know for sure) most if not all people do also) & those you care for. It may also be seen as "good" to someone who wants to use others to get what they want for themselves.

The few cases I'd seek revenge are if someone really hurt someone I care for or someone who should not have been harmed (I've got major issues with people hurting kids, period). The damage people can do to each other is appalling but sometimes it seems like the only way to break the cycle (temporarily) is to continue it by stopping(not necessarily by killing, just getting the problem person away from those you care for) (a) person(s) who have already harmed others.

Sometimes I get the feeling "innocent" may be a subjective term (naive may be more appropriate). The people I've figured get the label "innocent" are the ones who have little life experience &/or get caught up in problems that should never involve them.
The fact is, everyone no matter who they are & what they've done is going to die. It would be preferable if everyone could choose how they die, but I doubt that will ever happen . I see death as the equalizer that makes every living thing the same (everything(one) dies). What happens after death is not something one should assume to know & especially not assume they can determine who will end up where in the end...

it doesn't make anything better, it's principle. If you are wronged.... you would like the person to be wronged who anoyed you...