Nerdiness and Autism

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I was really unaware of any social stratification's in school.
I'm sure they must have been there.
I was the invisible man indivisibly introverted.

There were no other weirdos like me

I was tolerated, for short periods, in some groups at school, but I always knew that there was no way 'in' for me (and 'they' knew it better than me) , so I was a 'loner'. (Maybe loner is one of our hallmarks )

Break times (and especially lunch times) at school for me, were like scenes from 'Blade Runner' or the Martian scenes in 'Total Recall'.

As I am typing this, I am remembering the feelings of abject loneliness from the isolation and disconnection from everyone.

It was a f*****g nightmare.............

I spent a lot of time watching the clock, waiting for afternoon classes (and some sense of structure) to recommence

Last edited by Blindspot149 on 03 Jun 2010, 4:08 am, edited 1 time in total.

I don't fit in with them. The nerds have their own group of people who talk and chat in their own way. I don't fit in with that, never have.

I fit in with about two people, none of us are "nerds", especially one of them, who's an athletic kind of guy, very normal. Not sure why I get along with him so well, I think it's because he doesn't care about my weirdness and that I've never looked into his eyes. It's fine with me, he's happy to ask questions for me as well. I tend to help him with academics.

Anyway, I don't fit in with the nerds, and I don't fit in with any other groups, I fit in with a few people who avoid "cliques."

The few people that I do call friends all have one thing in common.

They are ALL comfortable spending time with me one on one (which is where I am at my best)

My most spectacular failures with 'friendships' in recent years have been with people who are NOT comfortable spending time one on one and who don't seem to function at all unless there is a quorum of at least 4 or 5 people.

I of my 'spectacular failures' even explained to me (before our spectacular failure) what hard work it is spending one on one time with people

That is entirely possible. I am a nerd. My husband is a nerd. Neither of us is on the spectrum but our daughter is. That's why the Assortative Mating hypothesis to explain some of the increase in autism diagnoses seems so plausible to me.

The Asperger Syndrome diagnosis did not exist when I was in highschool. Looking back, there was nobody in my nerd group that I would call 100% obvious Aspie by retroactive diagnosis (not that that's accurate, but still...). But there were a couple guys that had a trait here and there. We lost touch in our 20's and reconnected on Facebook recently. (Facebook didn't exist till we hit middle age just as Aspergers Syndrome didn't exist when we were in highschool). They self-identify as Nerds (with caps like that) but they haven't "come out" as Aspie. Perhaps they are not. Perhaps Facebook isn't the place for that (it's so very public despite the "privacy" settings). Perhaps they have put themselves in the "not sure whether I have it or not" category. Perhaps they are simply Nerds like me (BAP????) just as their Facebook pages say.

I think that a nerd is somebody who is booksmart and loves learning. I think a geek is somebody who is socially awkward and loves learning/academia to a level of intensity that is considered abnormal. While not all geeks are Aspies, I think that all Aspies are geeks as a rule. I only get along well with nerdy and geeky people. I get so excited and enthusiastic about my special interests that nerdy and geeky people find me amusing. So, that's why they're my only friends. And I never was teased after 7th grade, because my geekiness made people respect me. I always was seen as "the smart girl", and people liked how I could help them with any subject before a test.
-OddDuckNash99-

I was very much in the middle sometimes with the cool group sometimes with the nerdy group but overall i did my own thing being myself.

Confession:

It would appear from comments in this thread that I am more of a 'geek' than a 'nerd'.

Could someone explain the term 'dork' to me as I am not American.

Thanks

I took the Nerd, Geek, or Dork quiz on OK Cupid
http://www.okcupid.com/tests/the-nerd-geek-or-dork-test

Pure Dork

17 % Nerd, 26% Geek, 70% Dork
For The Record:

A Nerd is someone who is passionate about learning/being smart/academia.
A Geek is someone who is passionate about some particular area or subject, often an obscure or difficult one.
A Dork is someone who has difficulty with common social expectations/interactions.
You scored better than half in Dork, earning you the title of: Pure Dork. Like our friends Napoleon Dynamite & co.

It's not as though you were some whiz-kid in school. Oh, sure, you probably did okay in some classes, but were probably awful in others. Certainly most people thought you were smarter than you thought yourself to be. And it's not that you have some overriding passion, like computers or Star Trek that sets you apart for the crowd, though you likely share some interest in some of those sorts of things. You just like to be yourself, and want to express yourself for who you are.

And, really, there's nothing wrong with that. Being who you are often invites scorn, and so it's a difficult thing in a world that rewards conformity. Be proud of your dorkiness, for often it's just another word for individuality. (I'd vote for you!)

Congratulations!

I was actually called a nerd by someone who thought it was an insult, but in reality, I was more of a geek because I had dyscalculia, but never diagnosed as math was my worst subject, especially algebra and geometry. The actual "nerds" were taking the highest level of math available in high school, and often became the valedictorian at graduation.

This is VERY confusing.

Academically I seem to belong with the nerds!

I am socially 'distressed' so I fit with the dorks.

I have some dis-coordinated characteristics (geek) but I am good as sports

What the f*** am I

i tried to have a casual encounter with this hot nerd, and boy what a enflated ego nerds have. they wont be caught dead being friends with some aspergers people

Yes, I would say I'm totally a dork! Definitely not a nerd. I suck at math and I'm not particularly smart. My role in HS was to make up crazy stories or just ramble off at the mouth and make people laugh.

You are unique. Just like everyone else is.

I'm called "White n' Nerdy" alot by one of my friends Thanx to the "Weird Al" Yankovic song White & Nerdy but I'm a huge Al fan so even thou I don't have any of these characteristics except for liking Kirk & Picard; I consider White & Nerdy a major compliment I have nerd personality & social traits instead of having nerd smarts. Imagine if Steve Urkle was bad in academic stuff; I'm not quite that extreme thou

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