Ways Girls May Mask ASD

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Not true either. I know a really popular girl from my school who talked about her BF and described him as a very nice guy. I've overheard all of her conversations in my grade 11 chem class, lol.

You're right that it really depends on the person. You'll have girls who don't seem socially competent at all and boys that do better. It's just that in general, it's been found that girls come across more competent.

It's appearance, not actuality, however! I've noticed in talking to guys with ASD the same thing you have.. process times seem about the same.. but that's not always obvious to someone without an ASD. To them, many girls and women appear more fluid than we really are.

I don't think girls REALLY have a good grasp on social reciprocity. I just think they can be so good at covering it up that your average M.D. can't see beneath the act. Like I mentioned in the blog, I am far better at it now, but as a child, I was just pretending to be reciprocal, because I thought it would help me make friends--even though it didn't work. I think we do better talking to adults, and professionals are adults, so when we are assessed, we can appear very "normal" when we are far from it.

last post was @mathgirl

yeah, this one, right?

http://help4aspergers.com/pb/wp_a58d4f6 ... 83e339.JPG

I related to almost all of it.

Most girls seem to chase tough jerks and ignore the nicer guys. That is what I meant.

yup

Nope. I look perfectly ok, and guys may approach me at times, but they sense my differentness almost imediately. It scares them. Besides, we have just as much trouble connecting with people as guy aspies do. So even if I did like a guy that was willing to put up with my strangeness (and even occasionally be accidentally imasculated by my tomboyishness) I'd probably still blow him off the same way I do to anyone that tries to get too close. I don't think I do it on purpose, I just don't know how to have a typical two-way relationship with anyone. Something gets in the way.

Yes! I think that what really gets me are the subtleties. I can appear to be perfectly normal and pleasant, if a bit shy and awkward, but I don't get how to actually create a connection with someone when I am interacting with them. I can deal with a romantic relationship (if someone takes an interest i n me -- I am incapable of knowing how to show an interest in them) because it's much more straightforward, but I don't have any friends and have alienated the ones I have had by getting stuck on things they said or did that I thought were hurtful, when someone else would have just shrugged those things away.

I don't have any of the characteristic outward signs of AS, yet my social functioning is way below par. I have been diagnosed on the spectrum, but not exactly AS, and the expert said that girls and women almost never fit the full criteria of AS. So I agree with you that the criteria are what needs to be changed.

EEEEEEEEEE. Is this whitetiger from youtube? Saw your name and was happy to see familiar name here. This is Aspiegirl from youtube. http://www.youtube.com/user/Aspiegirl

Ok now that I did the EEEEEEEEE thing I am off to read your blog.

Signed the petition, think is a great idea getting this petition going

True. I couldn't establish a meaningful relationship even with someone on the spectrum who is my age, which is a shame. The reason is because they're mostly into television or video games, stuff I have absolutely NO interest in. I've always wanted to have a friend my age, from my school, who I would feel close to and with whom we could share interests, but it never worked out, no matter how hard I've tried.

On the other hand, I can spend hours talking to adults and deeply enjoy our conversations. With adults, it's easy to reciprocate, especially if we are talking one-on-one in a quiet environment. I wonder how, say, a male with AS who has significant communication difficulties, but with the same interests as me and with a more extroverted predisposition, would fare if they were to lead the same kind of lifestyle that I lead. You never know - the environment people live in, the way they were raised, the values they were taught, all of these things play a huge role because they all influence an individual's development.

Interesting. I'm pretty sure that I'm one of those "classic" cases, though. I'm a bit disappointed to see that most other girls who are supposedly on the spectrum I've met seem more high-functioning than me in terms of their communication ability. I've never really learned how to fake it among people my age well enough to get some friends.

EEEEEEE! It's Aspiegirl! SO cool. Thanks for reading my blog

I've personally never understood the bad-boy appeal. I like guys that are kind, intelligent and sensitive, and for the most part responsible. "Bad boys" seem like image obsessed, chauvinistic egotist to me. Not to mention how cliche that seems. I like the nice guys best. I don't, however, like overdone chivalry. I'm much more impressed when a guy treats me like an admired friend than like a delicate and incapable princess.

Even though we may not have been raised on the same books, I have to say, Ferdinand, I suspect that is bull.

I used to think that way. Not that I knew anything about ASD which did not exist in those days - there was just me and the few I got /got me and the many I didn't get / didn't get me.

But word from spectral opposite sex in my ears is, it ain't as easy as I used to think.

Oh boy. The blog hit home. I know I am going to sound like an idiot here but I am 45 years old and at least once aweek I STILL start bawling because I have no "real" friends.

I can imitate for very short periods but usually veer all conversations to my topics that I like almost 100% of the time. Which confused me as I am not sure what is meant by social reciprocity. I know I self focus on what I think about and that is not very give and take in conversations. Might be why I have no friends.

Came off sort of more like a male aspie or a mix of both male/female in childhood.

I live in a daydream world to this day. Always have. Sort of daydream I am socializing kind of thing. Very visual as I am 100% visual learner (tested as that)

Called Lesbo my whole life and diagnosed lesbo/gender disphoric by Dr when young just on physical appearanc alone. I am bi-sexual today not sure if that was choice or I just believed them and ended up there. Confused on that one.

The change in the DSM is scaring me to death. Now somehow I have to get people who don't get Aspergers from their own @#$$% idiot minds to somehow think I have autism which they think has to present just like the classic stereotype which they dont even have that one understood right. (referring to non-verbal autistics who are in there and can comunicate via alternate communication kind of things) Its going to be one big giant mess for the ASD/Asperger community who worked so hard to get that understood and are just getting somewhere and crash it falls down.

Really upset on this. I think they want anyone out who does not do it their way. We speak out and will not comply to the program and that is what they want to weed out. Or I am just paraniod.

You can only be ASD if you are ASD as they say ASD is.

Idiots. Who will hurt the younger ones when they have this kind of mentality. If they want to help the young ones they better get real. I dont want lil ones to grow up stil crying for friends in the imaginary fake social world at age 45. It does not stay fun. It becomes torture. Well for me it is.

Sorry for the rant. Been in really upset mood at the system on how it deals with ASD lately.

Warnig: way to lazy to spell check. .

I can't really describe how much it annoys me when people say this. I don't think it's a fair judgment to say someone has it 'easier' than you, and it's just unnecessary (in my opinion).