Aspies mistaken for sketchy, untrustworthy liars??? (Poll)

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It is true. They lie all the time. Lots of cops see their jobs as closing cases, getting convictions, and extracting confessions. NOT finding out the truth. So if you place yourself in that mindset, you can see why they'd lie to a suspect that "looks good for the crime" in order to put them behind bars and close the case. Never mind that the person was just in the wrong place at the wrong time.


Not all are bullies. But about half are. My friend's husband is one of the good cops. He said he could watch a room full of cops and determine which ones are on the force to serve and protect, and which ones are in it for "the hunt" as he called it. Some cops, mostly young men, get off on the thrill of hunting for criminals, and the power trip that goes along with it. Of course, he felt comfortable telling ME that. He'd never call out the bad cops to their face, or do anything that might be construed as breaking the ranks.

Young ex-military men are very common in police ranks. They are the worst. There should be a higher minimum age requirement, and they should hire more women.

I have had this directed at me many times.

When I was a child and they had me taking medications, some people made allowances for my behaviour as due to the medication - it was many years after I stopped taking medications that they figured out I am AS.

In between I have been accused of everything from disintrest to dishonesty to accusations that I might be a "crack whore" - sometimes people think I may be intoxicated if I seem distracted or my behaviour does not make sense to them.

The WORST is when I have been reffered to a speak with a service provider - because these are people you cannot avoid, and they treat me like I am lying about my medical issues (despite documentation) because they can't see anything wrong with the outside of me.

I dont really have a problem looking shifty cause as my mom says, "you have such an innocent face."
My best friend says my eyes are very "readable"
But I can see where guys with AS would have a harder time with looking innocent cause when a woman is nervous and unsure and kinda akward...police think we are weaker and more "delicate" but if a man acts like that, he is "up to something"
Which is not fair, however, for legal purposes I think it would be best that all AS folks carried a laminated copy of a doctor's note stating that you have AS. If you are ever interogated, show that to them. Then ask for a lawyer, dont answer any questions because of your disability until they get you a lawyer. You have the right to do this...there is also an exception that if you are disabled and dont understand what is being said during interogation, that makes that "evidence" null and void. So even if you do understand them....pretend that you dont.

I've been accused of lying quite a lot as a kid because I've always been nervous a lot & I don't explain things well sometimes. Aso the bullies were good at manipulating & they all stuck together & sense I had a history of behavior problems because of people not recognizing my AS; lots of people thought I was a lair. I also had a hard time discerning fantasy from reality & that didn't help

thats hard...when it comes to bullies. You are best verbally filleting them worse than a fist ever thought of. Go for their emotional psychological jugilar vein and I promice they will think twice before messing with you again. Unless of course they are very physical agressive in their bullying, that might esclate things. You could get a very small video recorder and catch them doing things to you once you get enough crap on them and send it to your local news station. There is alot of media about bullying right now.

I haven't' been bullied sense I was in school. There was physical stuff to. They'd hit me & when I hit em back I'd get in trouble for hitting em. My parents think I'm lying about things because I have a long history of being mistaken for lying. I can get away with lying in some situations when most people probably couldn't thou. One trick about lying is to let people think you are a worse liar then you actually are. That way when you need to come up with a lie & your good at it; they'll think your telling the truth

hey thats pretty good. My sister has a good trick. She constantly talks about how important honesty is...expects others to be honest to a T. Is blatently honest about everything, whether you want to hear it or not and then people thinks she could never tell a lie, which she uses when she does want to lie.. and nobody questions her honesty.

The reason that we're seen that way, is because of our poor eye-contact and squirmish body language. I feel that those cops should take sensitivity training.

So, are adult women "girls" or "old people"? Or did you just leave us out all together?

Personally, I'm long past girlhood and not yet and old person, and definitely female, and hoping you weren't calling women "girls".

I think they mean looking with ones eyes, NOT turning one's head. Head facing the officer, but eyes to the side.

No, emergency exits don't have to be wheelchair accessible, at least if they are from upper levels. Stairways are simply not wheelchair accessible. It's imperfect, but unless we are going to stop building buildings more than 2 stories tall, that's how it's going to be. (Elevators are not emergency exits, and I figure one floor above the ground is about the max for a ramp, if one were to build a ramp as an emergency exit.)

I agree they should be clearly marked.

My experience with the general public is that I'm trusted, but with police, they most usually think I'm hiding something, and they hold me up for a half hour or more asking me questions trying to trip me up somehow. "So you live in Dallas?" I say
"yes; about 4 months of the year". They say "What's the cost of the Tollway if you get on at the 635 and get off at your exit?", and all that type of thing. Then they'll also ask loaded questions; such as "Why do you have a toolbag in the back seat?" I'll say "We own some apartments and rentals, and I do all the repairs". Then they say "That sounds like a fishy story". Come on, kid, which of these car break-ins are you up to? Just confess to one, and I'll see that you're let off easy". (Of course I've never committed a crime in my life; not even stealing an extra paper from a newspaper box). Once they can't find anything to arrest me for, they still truly believe that I'm Public Enemy #1, and have lied to them about everything, and they give me a ticket for something like dim tail light bulbs, or a nick in the windshield, etc.

Charles

I think some Aspies could have problems with cops because some of us appear to be drunk or on drugs when we aren't on em. If you get pulled over at a DUI or an insurance check-point & the cops are giving you a hard time; it's possible that the cops could be trying to do their job & are not trying to be mean or anything. I'm not saying it's right but the cops are supposed to arrest drunk drivers & illegal drug users.
One of my cousin's a cop(well he's married to my cousin but I get along with him better than the rest of my cousins) he does CSI stuff & he is one of the good ones but he has told me before that he's seen some good cops go bad cuz of the stress & other things

In my life, I have had family, friends, teachers, cops, and just random acquaintances assume I was lying, up to no good, or a fake. I don't think it's just that we unintentionally produce the body language that people who are lying often do. I think it also has to do with the fact that most of us who were forced to have head on contact with the real world, like public school and college and even just home life, have a persona built up to "fit-in" with typical people. And we stay in that persona when we are around people. So in essence we are acting. And "acting is the biggest lie of all."

So basically the whole time we are in that persona we are hoping not to get caught, and that sends up a red flag because people think we are hoping not to get caught lying. And no matter how good you get it almost always seems like an "act," and often people misinterpret us a phony, shady, and untrustworthy because of it. I am 28 now, and can remember billions of times where I've run into this. From a dentists miscommunication with the pharmacist making me look like a drug seeker. To being set-up for punishment at school by other kids. And I've had my share of cops who think I'm up to no good. And they even get mad when they find out my record is clean. "STOP ACTING SUSPICIOUS" as he walks away.

Umm...ok cool. So the last time my inspection was out, I got pulled over and had proof I had 30 days to fix my car and reinspect. I show the proof and get "ah ok that's good. do you mind if I search your car?" um....why? which turned into him hassling me about my answer and trying to get in my head. So I told him my record is clean, he runs it, comes back shaking his head and laughing, and says "just so you know your answer to me searching your car sent up a red flag." to which I replied. "Sir, I'm autistic...everything I say is going to send up a red flag."