What causes Obsessions? Why are they frowned upon by NTs?

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Part of the problem is lack of knowledge. 95% of people without someone in their family on the spectrum have no idea what Asperger's is, and only a passing idea (Rainman, or worse) of what autism in general means.

I know because I was part of that 95%. I'm very well-educated, and in fact worked in a law firm doing medical malpractice, as well as for insurance companies, so I had a significant medical background. Yet the day I sat and googled my son's symptoms and behaviors looking for answers, the two answers that kept coming up - AS and HFA - were completely foreign to me.

I agree with you 100%, it sucks. A lot of things suck. It sucks that people look down on me because I ride a power chair if we go somewhere that requires walking due to severe neuropathy. I look fine. I get dirty looks climbing out of my truck at the handicapped parking spot. That sucks. When my son has a meltdown in the store because he *really* doesn't want flip flops for the pool, and people circle around and look at me like I'm killing the kid (who outweighs me and has sent me more then once to the ER for stitches in ME), that REALLY sucks.

And some days, when you've burned that last little reserve of wax off your candle, and your AS husband is going on and on again about another car and your son is going into meltdown mode because someone moved one of his umpteen calendars in his room, you have a moment where you say go ahead, see if you can do a better job.

Not all NT's are social butterfly movers and shakers. Many of us have one or less friends, and like it that way. Not all people with AS are non-social, unable to or undesiring to conform to some social structure. And in both groups, there are those who are happy with how things are and those who are not.

According to my mother, people don't much like it when I start on my special interest because I absolutely overload them with information. Unlike a lot of other people with AS or HFA I've talked to, my main interest (dogs) doesn't change. Ever. I mean, I have had it at least since I was a year old, and it's never faded. Accordingly, I have accumulated a truly gigantic database of information on my interest, have totally bored my family and most of my friends with it, and tend to get very excited if someone is foolish enough to bring it up--and then run at the mouth, burying them in a deluge of information. I'm working on that, and have been for most of my life, but it gets away from me sometimes.

Since a small child, my obsession has always been around the military, and I have done nothing but stir up resentment and envy throughout my military career. NTs don't like it when you are better than them at something.

I guess they are bad in some ways, but if your obsession is something you can make a career of you can do really BIG things. You excell at your obsessions better than most NTs.

What NTs don't understand really, they just don't seem to be able to quite grasp the concept, is that obsessions, sometimes, can be very good things.

For example, one of my obsessions is writing. Is that bad? I write all the time, and right now (see, I could've been a prick right there and used a pun... God I abhor puns...) I'm focusing all that into writing one big thing, a novel of sorts, and epic poem.

However, there are sometimes when obsessions are unhealthy... for example, my brother's friend (not Aspy) cuts himself. That's unhealthy.

I guess that Classic London and Routemasters are healthier than Drugs and Alcohol.