How to order a pizza?

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What OddFiction said is right. Ordering a pizza by yourself is very straightforward, and the small talk is minimal, often nothing beyond "hi", "have a nice day", and maybe a "how are you" at the beginning. If it helps, have the information they need written down and/or circled on the menu. Then rattle it off as they ask for it. If they offer an add-on or a special, it's simply a sales pitch they're trained to do, and you have every right to decline. At the end, I usually like to repeat my order and my address back to them, to make sure they have the right information. No one ever had a problem with it.

On the other hand, ordering pizzas for a groups of friends makes high school gym look tame in comparison, and that does 100 times if they're drunk and 1000 times if they're stoned. You're trying to enunciate the order, while people in the room are telling what they want, then when you're about to close the conversation and get a price, one person decides he wants more toppings, then when you finally tell the order taker, he goes back to his original order, then another person decides he wants cheese fries instead of crazy bread, until finally, you tell the order taker "I'm sorry, I'm going call back", hang up, and barely restrain yourself from smashing everything in the room while everyone is laughing at you, and vow to never host another party again.

I understand. First of all, there's something about pizza places that's intimidating; usually it's popular "IN crowd" people who work there, and it's cool people who are hanging out in pizza kitchens. That was enough to scare me away when I was younger.

They're usually really quick on the phone, and are hard to talk to. Often there's a lot of noise, and they make you feel out-of-place somehow, when you call in. But forget all that, and just call and order. Although it's not the healthy way to outgrow a thing like this, you can always say "Sorry, I missed that... Phone has a bad signal", and repeat what you said, or ask them to repeat the order so they got it right.

Then when they deliver it, tip them well. ($5 if you can, for a $15 order), or more if it's a bigger order. Money talks, and they'll be VERY nice to you forever, if you get the reputation of being a big tipper.

Charles

I think that this is one of the reasons why I keep coming back to WP!

There is no other place that I know of where you could post a thread asking how to order a pizza, ( or a similar sort of question ), and get several really helpful and friendly and serious replies within a half hour.

I so totally understand the problem/question too, having also always found ordering by phone a bit of a challenge or seriously alarming/complicated ( depending on the circumstances ).

I hope the pizza arrived ok, Metamorphosis, that it was the right one, and that it was as delicious as pizza can be ( speaking as an ex-pizza-addict on a gluten-free diet here ).
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Well I'm glad it went smoothly!! !

Most people don't understand how doing something as simple as ordering a pizza can cause a nervous breakdown! When I have to place the order I always write down what I want and try to be as nice as possible. It's stressful when they come to the door but I've done this so many times it doesn't bother me too much anymore. Seriously though it's better that you use the phone. As much as I HATE the telephone it's good practice. Now the real challenge is ordering chinese food. It's already hard for me to understand what people are saying but usually if it's a family run business I don't understand their accents very well, and they probably feel the same way talking to me!!

Just for the record, Scandinavians only tip at finer restaurants.

All you have to know is their phone number, your address & phone number, what size you want, what you want on your pizza, what style crust. Let them do all the asking, and be sure to give a tip on delivery. I rarely call out for pizza because that's too hard for me.

I'm sure Mr. pink from reservoir dogs wouldn't mind staying in Scandinavia.

I used to have problems doing this to. It's just kind of awkward, I don't know to say what kind of pizza first, or where I live, or whatever first but now I just go right into it and say whatever kind of pizza I want because at most places they keep your number registered if you call a second time.