Anyone else has "oh s**t" moments years later?

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Oh geez, this has happened to me more times than I can count.

Just one example ... when I was about 15, I met a boyfriend's grandmother. She told me her name, which I don't remember now but was one of those old-fashioned women's names like Gertrude or Mabel or something. So I blurted out ... "wow, that's a funny name!"

It didn't occur to me until days later that it was a terribly rude thing to say.

I agree that's a good one I've said things like that, I can't remember a particular one right now, but I remember the feeling after lol

I can tell you about one I was lucky enough to avoid recently tho, I am so glad I thought about it in time. I was trying to support morally a person who is jailed in a middle-eastern country right now, and they hang people a lot right now for whatever reason they want, and he doesn't know what will happen to him yet, and I said "stay strong" but the first thing I thought of and almost said is "hang in there", that would have been bad considering the situation.

LOL this is a great thread. I have so many of these past gaffs that I remember now but didn't realize at the time they were gaffs.

I knew a girl through a friend (years ago), and I remembered that at one stage she had put loads of weight on. But one day my mate was with her and I met her again and she had lost the weight again. I remember saying: "You were fat last time I saw you and I couldn't believe how big your tits were."

This provoked some nervous laughter but she saw the funny side.

When I think back to things like this I wonder if these people knew I had some mental condition. Sometimes people just seemed to make allowances for me.

lol same here. I could never tell when girls liked me in highschool until it was too late. Some of them were really hot too. I'd usually be too distracted crushing on a different girl.



lol yeah. I'm always in my own world as I walk too. Makes me think that I'd be dangerous behind the wheel.

Yes this has happened to me a cringeworthy number of times.

I remember around 5 years ago a friend announced happily that he was going to university to study Computers. I was hugely into computers at the time and asked him what exactly he would be studying, and he replied he would be studying databases and business-relevant aspects of computing. I immediately responded that stuff was not interesting at all, and that the interesting part of studying computers involved programming, assembly language, etc.

I remember realizing afterwards that he didn't respond to well to this, but I reassured myself it was ok as there's nothing wrong with telling the truth. Of course in retrospect today I'm pretty embarrassed about it..

There have also been a number of occasions where somebody would get a hair cut, or new clothes, and when asking how they looked, I'd tell them EXACTLY what I thought, good or bad. The film 'Liar Liar' was particularly confusing for me as I seen his level of honesty and directness as a good thing, even something to aspire to.

I really struggle with this tendency to be overly direct even today. I think the NTs call it a lack of tact. In contrast, I think they lack honesty, but I'm trying to learn how to be less direct so as not to upset anybody unintentionally.

[quote="THABTO"]WOW!?!
ME TOO... WHEN IN MY TEENS I HAD GIRLS HIT ON ME ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL THE TIME.... AND NEVER KNEW IT TILL YEARS LATER... ONCE. I WENT TO A GIRLS HOUSE TO STUDY, THEN SHE CAME OUT IN HER UNDIES. AND ASKED "DO I LOOK FAT"... ----SHE WANTED "IT"----DUH... BUT I SAID. "DO YOU WANT ME TO BE HONEST".... SHE SAID "YEAH"... I WENT IN DETAIL AND TALKED ABOUT ALL HER FLAWS, PUBES, THE MOLE ON HER NECK, ETC... AND JUST OUT RIGHT EMBARRASED THE HE77 OUT OF HER... AT THE TIME I DIDNT KNOW WHY SHE WAS SOOOOOOOOOO MAD AT ME... LMAO.... I COULD OF GOTTEN LAID BUT HAVING A/S I WAS BEING MY SELF........

Yup.
Several women in college invited to me to hear "thier stereo system" at home or the like.
I was too mentally impaired to realize what that meant.. it so depressing to think about now!

Been known to happen

Several years ago, I was complaining to my mom that my older sister kept borrowing my clothes and never returning them. My mom told me not to let my sister borrow them anymore. A day or two later, I was wearing a new shirt and my sister said something like, "That's a nice shirt". Thinking she was going to ask to borrow it, I decided to be one step ahead of her, so I said: "Yeah, it's too bad you're never going to wear it." My parents were furious with me, but I was puzzled as to why. It literally took me years to figure out that what I said was rude.

I agree with you, why do they ask if they don't want to know the truth? I try to think about it before speaking up tho, because of all the bad experiences with telling the truth in situations like that lol but still I don't think they should ask what I think about something unless they actually want to know what I think about it. But I try to be nice and say something like "it looks nice" even if I think it looks silly, just so I don't hurt the other person's feelings, but if you knew me I think after a while you would realise if I don't like your new haircut (for example) I simply don't say anything, while if I like it I will mention it without you having to ask. Anyway I don't have a problem with the fact that a person may like her/his new haircut while I may not like it, after all who cares its their haircut lol.

Adding this: I just thought of something that happened a few years ago, about a haircut, not sure if I mentioned it in another thread or not but anyway, it was my sister-in-law, she got a haircut and style for her parents anniversary, and it was horrible (in my opinion of course), she jumped from 25 year old to 65 lol it made her look so much older then she was, and being myself I simply didn't say anything about it, but then of course she had to ask me what I thought about her new haircut and she looked happy and proud of it, so I just said "it looks nice" ... I don't like having to do that, but I didn't want to hurt her feelings so I lied.

Shadi

thankfully no...pretty much everything I said stupid I realized only shortly thereafter. Since though I couldn't really think of anything else to say...I generally just stopped talking.

Oh yeah... the girls hitting on me thing. I forgot about that. In high school I was fairly weird but somehow my AS gave me some sort of below the radar cool status or something. As in I have no idea why I was seen as interesting opposed to being the target for beatings and stuff... anyway. There was this girl who I sorta knew and we had been in alot of classes throughout the whole 4 years of high school.

Anyway toward the end of senior year she broke up with her boyfriend and started being even more especially friendly toward me. I mean we weren't friends but we had talked quite a bit for acquaintances... Anyway I'm not going to go into detail about all the nice things she started doing since none of it was risky talk... and would probably sound boring... but it was enough for me to realize she was probably banging her head on an imaginary wall inside her head saying "Why doesn't he get it!"... and now I feel pretty stupid because I can look back and say "Why didn't I get it!".

Seriously though I think part of my not getting it is when I look back I wonder why she would have been interested in me. She was fairly pretty and very intelligent. She also hung out with the popular kids and was active in school planning stuff... where as I was just an average looking dark nerdy artist who spent lunch alone and did my school work (Sounds weird that I wasn't the target of bullying). I don't know if she just liked my art or thought my awkward nervousness was cute or something.

I ran into her again when we ended up both going to community college in the same place... but even then I wasn't sure if I should approach her and ask if she had feelings for me because I'm always afraid I'm going to say something wrong. So really all that was said was "Hi" a few times and then I never saw her again. I am so damn stupid!

Edit: To clarify, she was trying to get me to be her boyfriend. I just realized everyone else here with a similar topic was expressing they got lost about girls hitting on them for sex.

Been down that road alot... Gals hitting on you an then you not knowing what the hell you're supposed to do. I seriously do realise that when I think about it awhile later. From grade 7 onwards I had ALOT of gals hitting on me and ALOT of chances missed. Dammit...

When I was in college in a small town, I was not very smart and nieve about people.
I often picked up rides to the store or the college. One time, a guy picked me up saying he would take me to the grocery store. I hopped in...he started talking about going behind some building to perform some oral sex with him. He thought I was a prostitute!! As soon as he stopped at the stop sign, I hauled @ss out of the car. Now I cant believe I was so stupid to take rides like that...and that could have ended very badly. Somehow, I always have had rouge guarding angels. If I could count the number of times, I escaped a really bad situation, I would lose count

I somehow have never had problems getting a boyfriend. Yet oddly enough in college I had far too many dates. It occurs to me that I shouldn't have simply asked for what I wanted out of the relationship and yes I always got it but I also had a bad reputation. I didn't understand until recently why my reputation was so awful now I do. I'm glad I got married quickly. I realize now a lot of the people thought I was a slut when I thought I was just being honest. I thought honesty was the best policy....... I would just go up to whatever guy I liked and ask if he wanted to have sex. In retrospect that was probably not the best thing to do.....but I thought I was being honest. I only did it 2-3 times while I was single as I was very picky. In any case for some reason I always had a date......I thought for a long time it was because they liked talking to me......I guess not because I have terrible social skills and only discussed what I liked. When I realized why I had so many dates and finally was told what was going on I had a huge oh sh*t moment I felt absolutely awful.

Last edited by kate123A on 20 Nov 2010, 10:11 am, edited 1 time in total.

He set himself up to be asked. You weren't rude.

But yeah not everyone goes there for fun. Some of us go to fight with our families.

edit - oh yeah, the OP.

It took me 13 years to realize that what I considered random acts of vandalism were all the same person trying to get even with me for not going out with him.

I think about a lot of mistakes I've made over the years, going as far back as 5-6 years.

I remember my first time randomly talking to someone on the subway, when I left I said "thank you have a very nice day." which was very inappropriate for the situation. I found just saying bye to be weird, I was thinking about it for two stops and when i got to my stop I hadn't come to a parting phrase.