How to explain mutism to others

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Maybe it's just me, but I think you should word it a bit differently. "I can't speak right now" sounds a bit tame to me, as if you were saying "I can't come to the phone right now."

"Can't", I suppose to most people, doesn't do enough to convey the true "I am really, really, really trying to speak to you but my throat won't make the noises required." that's going on.

Maybe, in addition, you could try mouthing the words you're trying to say? I can't remember if I can mouth words when I go mute...come to think of it, I'm not sure if I've even tried before, since I don't think I know anyone who can read lips. I've never been in a situation before where I had to prove that I couldn't speak.

And I think the "throat infection" lie is a bad idea.

I couldn't do that because I can't formulate the words. At best, I can formulate them if I write them. If I'm lucky. In regular sensory overload I could manage that, but if I am anxious as well (having a meltdown) my mind would race trying to think how to say it, or hit a blank.

http://www.wrongplanet.net/modules.php? ... 62#3266762


^ Refer to above. There were many valid points posted in this thread (thank you, SteelMaiden & others). As a result, I just informally updated the (former??) 'special silent forum,' which I hope is now more user-friendly to all Wrong Planet members. This thread would be just right for the 'special silent forum.'

Some people carry autism cards that explain briefly that sometimes they have trouble getting words out and may have to communicate in writing or be given some time to collect themselves before they can talk. This would be an option for people who have periodic mutism and worry that they may not be able to speak on command.

Yeah, it's been more than a year since I last went mute, so I can't remember if I could mouth the words or not...but you would think that if I could have, I would have...

You could try one of these cards

http://www.aspergerinfo.com/ascard.htm

Don't use the throat infection excuse. After 2-3 times, they will figure it is ONLY an excuse or that you are sickly, rude, and/or lazy.

WOW. MY problem is that things probably sound like they drop 20+ IQ points. I may slur words, run them together, etc... As I have said for decades, I just CAN'T handle stress. And CAN'T and ABLE ARE overly used and all but meaningless. By can't, I mean generally incapable.

Oddly, one of my defenses is to try to avoid people and take care of the problem in peace. I guess you could call it elective mutism. I talk only if I feel I don't have a choice. But sometimes it is like 3 threads control my vocal cords, and things get jumbled.

I am like that too, although the silly thing is that I still have my nerdy intellectual vocabulary, I just can't sound intellectual!

Tony Attwood describes the lowered-IQ thing in his Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome. About 30 points, he says.