Do you have one person who understands you?

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I have family who are tolerant (or, better, oblivious to certain standards of normalcy), but as far as understanding, no.

Yes, my wife does--we have been together 12 years.

Noper

Partly because I don't or can't get close enough to anyone long enough.
The very few who once thought they have understood me, get almost as many surprises as I do.
Most of the mental health professional's are way out in left field when it comes to understanding.
They have to have a text book answer to place me somewhere in the text book they studied.
And I pay them to justify their education and their job, the more quacks, the more diagnosis.
Thing is, I am far from text book any(one)thing, and they just coincidentally have a "special"
answer for placing me somewhere in their limited world of understanding.

No. The one person who understood me best was my grand-father. Which i found strange since i was almost mute for most of my childhood. I never got how he could understand me so well because i'm pretty sure he wasn't an aspie.

I have a friend who understands me, and there's a nurse who volunteers at the soup kitchen who understands me. The rest of the people that I know, don't understand.

No ...but saying that I do have friends who don't quite 'get me' but really like me all the same.

Currently , I have an INTJ/INTP(?) friend who respects me and my opinions. Doesn't see the (angry) meltdowns, or physiological foibles, though.

It's( remotely) possible that someone could traverse the terrain and truly know you, as to how to walk in your shoes.

I have one friend who understands me pretty well, but she got married and moved away. I don't speak to her much any more.

Edit - She also has a two or three year old brother who was recently put on the autism spectrum. I'm very glad that she's his sister.

Last edited by js3521 on 27 Dec 2010, 8:54 am, edited 1 time in total.

i am not sure i understand what you mean.
my speech is intelligible most of the time. most people who i talk to understand what i say.
obviously people who do not speak english would not understand me.

i spoke on the phone earlier to an nt "friend" and i told her that there was a thread that asked "do you have one person who understands you?", and i said that it seemed to me that the thread was asking "is my speech intelligible to anyone at all", and i remarked that i thought the thread was biased against people who are extremely incapable of legible communication who nobody can understand, and i remarked that it would be futile to ask a person who is incapable of legible conversation if anyone can understand them, for they would not be able to answer.

she told me that the title meant "can anyone feel what i feel".

so if that is what the topic title is asking, then i would have to say i do not know because i do not know what other people feel, and even if they feel the same things i do, i would never know.

i only understand what they say, but i do not know why they say it. if they say they feel the same way i do, then i guess i would believe them, but i know that there is much of my internal life that i never show, so i can not see how they could know what it is.

i can not fathom what happens inside someone else's head in a subjective way.

I can't really say that my daughter understands me, but she loves me no matter what, so who cares? It is the same for me, toward her. I don't understand her all that well, but I love her no matter what.

It occurs to me that with our mutual acceptance of one another, the "need" to understand each other or to BE understood by one another, isn't really there. Interesting...

I suppose it was my grandmother though, she passed away many years ago therefore, there is no at this juncture...

Not a single one. I am alone in my wackiness I guess.

Last edited by Todesking on 27 Dec 2010, 7:35 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I think it is the same; if I explain a feeling in words I am often misunderstood. People believe anything but what I tell them.

People use to tell me that I am too sensitive and that I make the problems myself. If I e.g. have been treated badly, my friends could take the side of the offender. If I e.g. have upset somebody without knowing why, my friends could tell me Im stupid. If I e.g. have social anxiety issues my friends could tell/show me Im a looser. If I tell anything about my feelings (especially the negative ones) to my friends, they often just try to end the conversation.

I have the suspicion that it is how I talk (including body language) that makes me misunderstood.

Well, I have one close friend I've been in touch with for many many years. Last week I told him about the terrible truth. He said like WTF he said I look and act completely normal. It's just this friend knows absolutely nothing whatsoever about my condition and I don't think he's about to seriously dig into it. Anyway there is onbody on earth that truly understands me, like an aspie. We should form a country, us all aspies. Perhaps it should be called Aspieland, or Aspiestan, or something.

I feel like nobody understands me completely. A few people know and understand some parts of me very well, but there is nobody who understands or knows all aspects of me very well or who I feel like I can talk to about everything.

I have a couple of friends who understand little bits of me. My parents also understand small sections of who I am. But nobody understands the whole, and that includes myself.

I feel most myself when I am alone. I'm not putting up a facade. I'm not limiting what I say. I don't need to protect myself when I'm the only one here.

I don't think anyone could understand me since I never feel free to be myself when I am with other people.