Are you a textbook example of Autism?

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When I was a kid, I had the rote memory skills. I do believe parts of the brain get stimulated during childhood and some of my rote memory skills were replaced with skills involving problem solving, reading and writing.
So now I don't have the rote memory like I did when I was a kid.
I do believe, in my case, my brain somewhat rewired itself during childhood.

I can relate to this. I too have had one close friend at a time -- and was not aware that this was typical for Aspies. Right now I have a few friends, which is unusual for me, but I still feel very isolated and alone, in part because my one close friend -- my bf -- left me and I feel lost without that one rock of support.

Cosigned.

In some ways yes. In some ways no.

Thanks; very nicely put. That's one facet of my AS in a nutshell.

I have an unusual case. My symptoms started around 2 and a half and were most severe between the ages of 4-8, peaking at 6.

Anyways,

-I make good eye contact (I have asked people and they say I do, however, I had issues with it when I was in the lower grades of elementary school, not so much in preschool)

-I have better socials skills than most people with AS seem to have, but still not as good as the average NT (However, I tend to have better social skill when interacting with adults then when interacting with peers)

-I don't pay attention to detail

-I don't enjoy maths and sciences all that much, some science is OK, I guess

-I don't think in pictures

-I don't have very many sensory issues

-I don't feel like I understand animals all that well

-I have a great sense of humour

-I understand facial expressions and tone of voice (However, I have a hard time reading the eyes, but not faces in general)

-I don't like being alone for long periods of time

-I am super emotional

Most people would probably think I am NT........until I had a meltdown. What do you call a person who has meltdowns, but not many other autistic symptoms?

Don't you just have AS though?
It has come to my conclusion (and correct me if I'm wrong) that b9 is far more autistic than a lot of people here. Over the years I have noticed it and I really enjoy reading your posts.
Autism to me is about self. When I say autism I mean classical autism early in life. I never desired to have friends, more I was forced into it and as I became a bit more high functioning I became to like it. Although now that I'm not as HF as before I've not desired it as much, although people still expect me to go out.
Even people with AS talk about themselves a lot.

Just remember Wavefreak, just because you see autism one way doesn't mean another would.

Personally, I refer to my childhood as traditional autism. I did all the stereotype behaviours. I had one intense interest, I lined and stacked things obsessively. My self help skills developed really slowly. I don't even remember thinking too much about people or the world like I do now. I screamed at any slight change or if things didn't go the way I wanted them too.
These days I still don't make eye contact, lining up and stacking only happens if I'm in a group socialisation situations, I flap and run around when excited or just understimulated, I'm far more organised and speak in such a linear way.
I never used to share what was going on with me to other people, especially my mother. Now I do though sometimes I regret it.

Oh and imagination has to do with how one sees the world. If a severely autistic person can't leave their house then they're not going to experience much of it and not have as much imagination. My imagination early in life was built on what movies I watched and overtime socialisation has been developed into it.

I thought I wasn't a stereotypical aspie but it has come to my attention that I am. Oh well.

I am in the last phases of getting an official DX. While I suspect that it will be written up AS, my memories and progression through grade school are more consistent with HFA. Since I have no records or family to corroborate this, it will likely be a moot point.



Perhaps I was reacting to what I perceived as a condescending attitude by the doctor. If autism is about self it is because that is virtually the only thing an autistic knows. They can't PERCEIVE the things that let people develop such things as empathy and Theory of Mind. I don't see autistics as self centered or even self absorbed, but rather bounded by their perception so that all they can know is self. If the only data coming in is bounded by self, then that is all that you can learn and all that will motivate your behavior. This is NOT the same as narcissism or selfishness. You cannot be selfless unless you can perceive a path to become selfless. With a great deal of effort, those boundaries can be broken down and less self oriented thought and behavior can be learned. It is a testament to autistics that as they realize there is more to the world than their self, that they reach out for human contact that is NOT self centered. It is as if the autistic is casting about within themselves for something they cannot find, because that thing they seek is other people, contact on a meaningful level with other "selfs",

Why do we try so hard? Because we are selfish, self absorbed, narcissistic egomaniacs? No. We try so hard because we are just as human as anyone else and want to feel part of something, even if our own intrinsic neurology throws up barriers to gaining that contact.



True. I get a little intense at times.



This was me as a child, without the screaming and tantrums. That behavior was beaten (literally) out of me. It is such things that make me think the correct DX would be HFA and not AS.



I recall having a very concrete view of the world. Monster movies were real, imaginative play was always a matter of following others cues and imaginations. Mom said I deserved to be dead and I believed it (fortunately I had no concept that would have allowed me to kill myself at the time). I accepted all things as true until the inconsistencies in accepting everything as true overwhelmed my view of reality and FORCED me to consider each part of my world as possibly false, partitioning reality into true, likely true, possibly true, indeterminate, possibly false, likely false and false. The vast majority of what I think false into the middle three. It leaves me in a very tenuous state, always testing my thoughts and perceptions against previous conclusions about reality, discarding things previously considered as plausible, constantly adjusting my understanding of an external world so vastly complex and filled with data (sensory information) that I cannot possibly integrate and process all that I perceive.

Anyway. I apologize to anyone that took offense to my explosive BS!. I just really hate it when a health professional makes such a pronouncement shrouding it with an air of inevitable, unavoidable certainty.

You should stroke her on the chin and see how she likes it.

well i do not know really. i seem to remember you often denigrate my posts and i remember you often say "BS" to what others contribute.

i agree that my post was very flowery and quite strange, but you just told me my post is BS and then "told" me how autism really is.

i believe what i wrote because i described how i am, and you called it BS and i just do not have much time for people like you who think i am lying or deluded when i describe who i am.


well my doctor loved me and i loved her and she made time to see me every day because she was intrigued by what i said to her and she cared about me. i asked her what autism means (i was only young) and she said aut=self and ism=of. she knew me even though she had to burrow deep inside my closed off existence to find me. she was one of very few that ever found the way to me.

she was not condescending at all.



and here you go trying to reset the idea that i perpetrated as if you are giving new meaning to it. that was her meaning and it was my meaning too.

i am blind to other people's brain processes, and i can only calculate them. i can not see them with my "soul" like most people do. my brain has to calculate what they are feeling, and all i ever get from my calculations are approximations, and they are completely inadequate for the task of bonding with them.

i can say what i think about what someone feels, but i can not say what i sense about what someone feels because i sense nothing.

anyway wave freak, i do not think we have much in common, and so it may be better if you just ignore me.i have no influence over this site, so you do not have to police me.

I'm not going to get into it with you because there is a complete misunderstanding between us. I had, nor have, any issues with what you said. As I admitted, my reaction was to what I perceived as condescension by a health professional not to anything you said. I even apologized. I guess an apology isn't enough.

whatever. i do not care about the matter any more.

i am off to sleep because i am tired.

Yes.

I think for some AS is that NT want to be your friend but because we take things literal most times we end up feeling we done fit in not the other way around. I find NT very boring and dont understand why everything has to be complex with them its so annoying just give me an simple answer and move on thats why I like to be on my own most of the time but I do like company I usually attract people the same as me my kids tell me I have crazy friends.

It sounds like you don't actually disagree with b9 or his doctor. b9 said his doctor called it "self-ism" which your above paragraph describes. If the doctor actually meant "selfish" or "narcissist", don't you think s/he would have used those words rather than this neologism which is more accurate than either of them?