Am I supposed to repeat what they say?

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It makes sense, I just didn't realize I was supposed to do that. I know that empathetic listening requires that I rephrase and repeat back what I hear (it's more than that, I know, but simplified here). However, when others approach me with tasks and directions, empathetic listening is not a skill that is needed, so I don't approach it that way.

When I want to know if someone heard what I said, I will don't go repeating the same thing over again, I simply and directly ask, "Did you hear me?" If I really think they were not listening, I will say to them, "Were you listening to what I said?" Generally though, I guess I've always just assumed that when people say, "Ok.", "I understand." or "I'll do it." that they are confirming that they have received and comprehended the directions. I will ask if they have any questions and then move on if not.

I do the same. If I am not exactly sure what is desired, I will ask for clarification because I do not like to proceed unless I am absolutely certain what is expected of me. I absolutely hate "do overs."

I would think that nodding and saying, "Okay," would be a strong indicator that you would do as desired. However, I think that saying, "I will do it," would be as well, yet it seems to be more subtle than I intend...

I actually do repeat myself like that. And repeatedly check up on them. Because in my experience most people cannot understand simple directions let alone complex one's. I used to tell someone once. Then walk off and come back to a total catastrophe. After hundreds of times (yes literally -- I have to direct caregivers every day) I finally got so I not only repeat myself but check up on them unless they show extraordinary evidence of skill in this area.

And by the way I eventually told my case manager I was not able to keep repeating. So she typed an instruction sheet for everything. And they still not only got it wrong, but sometimes ask me instead of reading it, and sometimes mess up and when I ask they said they didn't read it. (headdesk)

Honestly I was beginning to wonder if it was my communication skills that were lacking that I couldn't get simple concepts across.

Mind you I can't follow verbal multistep instructions well. But I have an excuse.

When explaining complex tasks verbally, I tend to have trouble maintaining a linear path on the more basic concepts, so I usually create training sheets or manuals. I will use these to walk people through the process and then leave the manual with the individual, so that they can follow the steps. However, I tend to run into the same problem of people not taking the time to read the instructions (I don't know why though. I always read instructions.). I used to have one staff member who would repeatedly ask me about the same process at least once or twice a week. I finally asked, "Did you read the instruction sheet I gave you?" and she said, "No, I just thought it was easier to ask you." I then told her, "It's not easier for me when you interrupt my work to ask me, that's why I gave you the instructions, and I expect you to start using them." She was not happy, but I needed my staff to be somewhat self-sufficient, and this was not happening (just another reason I realize now that cannot be a manager - I expected (needed) staff to be as independent as I am, and even with encouragement, that just doesn't happen that often)

Yesterday, I told my supervisor and coworker that I MUST have written instructions for anything that is lengthy or multi-step. I told them that it is very difficult for me to remember long sets of verbal information. After I explained this, they seemed to absorb it and begin attempting to assist me with this.

you could try saying something other than a simple okay or yes. maybe if you paraphrase them that will help them get that you heard it and will remember it. try something like, "Alright, got it. i just have to slide this over and then flip this to the other side. thanks." and them make sure you do it properly and promptly or they will continue to repeat themselves every time. i will admit i find myself giving instructions to my step-son and my other half repetatively. it's not to be annoying but because i want to make sure they do it right. i know they heard it the first time. i know they understood what i was saying. the thing is that they have a history of either completely ignoring the instructions i gave them and trying to do it their own way resulting in screw ups, or they do a half-a@@ job of it and i end up having to redo it because they decided that one step was unimportant or illogical and so they skip that step which again messes it up. or they get side tracked as many as people do and just totally forget to do it. the best chance i have to get them to do it properly is to repeat it a couple times even though i know it's annoying. it's annoying to me too knowing i have to repeat it because if i only say it once(even though i know they hear me) they won't do it right. it's like the more i say it they do it properly just to try to spite me and prove how they can do it.... i don't know why it works that way it just does.