Are you NOT Independent?

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I'm fairly independent. I live with my parents and I don't drive but I cook some of the meals and I clean and do laundry.
I've been alone for weeks at a time and I've done fine. I would live alone but my finances aren't up to par and there's no disabled housing in this state.

i was independant before i tried the experiment of reintegrating into normal society, that ultimately ended in a diagnosis, so yes i was independant, but at the moment i would crack under the pressure without my parents and my brother.

i believe i can become independant again if i put enough work into it.

I feel guilty quite often, too. It can be really hard when people think you are perfectly capable because they've talked to you and you seem alright. They aren't seeing that the reason you seem alright is because you have the help you need. I don't know what your circumstances are, but I am usually fine talking to people in person as long as there is at least one person around me that I know well already. Don't get me wrong, it can be awkward and I might be uncomfortable, but it's bearable and for me the awkwardness can be humorous. But this can even count for online -- it makes me feel a little ashamed sometimes when I hang out with people my own age and we are on the same intellectual level and get along well, but I keep remembering that unlike me, they work and pay their rent, they drive a car, they have plans. It can hurt sometimes. I have other problems besides AS, too, and it takes a lot just to manage them.

I'm sure you know how lucky you are to have your family to take care of you, despite the guilt you sometimes feel. When I was first lurking here I remember from a lot of your posts, your family seems to love you and be supportive. Life isn't always about being independent, even though modern society has smashed it into our brains that it is. I wonder why people would tell you that you need to move out..? I think it's strange when people let things like that bother them, if you're happy and doing well at home. (Or at least as much as possible -- it's not always so with mental problems, but you're doing well as long as there is someone to care for you.)

i live alone. but i do get help from the person i hired from the brokerage i'm with (I don't like calling her a caregiver because she's more of a friend to me besides, words like that are really offensive to me) I also sometimes get help from my dad if there's an issue with something electronic in the apartment (he's a tech guy.) also he's an emergency contact if something happened to me. I've only had help from the management staff once, my toilet was clogged it was the middle of the night and I had to wait until the next day because the office was closed. I was so mad, I was going up and down my hallway cursing! But the next day at work, I called my brother (who also helps me out when he can) and told him what happened, he said he would tell our dad for me. So then I had to go to the store and buy a plunger cause I didn't have one (Seriously, who moves and takes their PLUNGER?! !!) when I came home, I checked on the toilet (because dad called and said the maitnance guy would fix it while I was out) and lo and behold, it was still clogged! so i had to go to the office and tell a staff member about my situation. They filled out something and were going to call the guy after he was finished fixing whatever was broken in the complex. Moments later, I open the door, and there's one of the staff members holding a plunger.
Long story short, everything works now and I hope it stays that way.

With a number of skills I have the capacity but sometimes it takes me a unique way in order for me to learn it and unfortunately I've never been able to teach myself much or reach out to the right person.

Troubles with verbal communication is mostly why I'm dependent by society's standards. As long as it's seemingly so essential I don't know what's going to happen. It's a miracle I ever got on SSI - the bureaucrats wanted me to talk on the phone to answer some questions but I just couldn't and my mom handled it all, even though I don't think that was proper protocol.

It's been a long time since I was alone but I did manage to live entirely alone for several years in my 20s, although at one point I did live out of my car for a solid six months. Though I was working. I had moved to another city and just didnt want to get an apartment. I found the thought of dealing with the people required to do that somewhat overwhelming. I had done it before but always with someone else.

At some point people started to suspect that I didnt have an apartment and I hurried and found one just to throw them off. lol.

I am independant in some ways but things have to be shown to me for me to learn. I depend alot on my husband to help me and i would be lost on alot of things if i didn't have him.

I live on my own but needed the help of other before opening a bank account or moving into a new house, etc. I was also not independent at all in my job until I got the structure of the day and was told what I had to do (though, I was actually told off lately for not guessing what I was supposed to do). I basically need people to tell me what to do in my everyday life, tend to get lost, have trouble taking a real decision on my own but I am working on it.

I live alone but it has not been pretty at times. At first I didn't have a choice, family members died and no choice. Those were rough years, constantly having utilities shut off...notes pinned to the post box that it is too full to deliver any more. Then I had some relationships and of course meh partners took care of the nightmare. Now it is hit or miss. I am very lucky I have a great job because I'm still awful with money, but not like it used to be with my entire networth stuffed in my pockets. I have to remind myself constantly to manage better but I still feel like a gazillionaire on payday and looking around for stuff to sell when my pockets (bank account) are/is empty. Money is hard to figure out. After I pay something I have no thought that it will have to paid again...like groceries....no understanding they run out. I pay bills and buy food and think...done deal.

I'm somewhat independent. I live with my mom, but I'm financially independent and I'm responsible for household repairs, assist her in getting around, do a lot of the household purchasing, and help her with the more difficult purchases.

My finances are a mess, but fortunately, I make enough money that I don't have to keep too tight a budget. Paying bills on time is a nightmare for me. The idea of keeping track of money or sitting down and writing a check is just so painful to me. Tax time is a horror. I end up paying a lot more in taxes than I need to, because I can't be bothered to keep financial records.

I don't bother trying to straighten out mistakes. If someone messes up, and I get overcharged or I don't get what I want, I generally just ignore it. I waste a lot of money that way, but dealing with strangers to fix problems is really difficult for me.

I think that kind of thing is extraordinary frustrating for almost everyone! You're dealing with a bureaucracy, no incentive for the employees to really care or try, etc, etc.

I think there are a set of skills, where you're more likely to medium-touch it. I guess. I 'm still learning


After living in a dorm and apartments from '82 to '84, and again on my own with apartments and some roommate situations from 1985 to 2008, I have been living with my parents since Oct. 2008. And yes, it has been difficult.

And that is an entirely defendable answer. With most large organizations, there are actually disincentives from the employee extending himself or herself and trying to help you. And depending on how much you make, the time you save and/or the stress and strain you avoid may be more than worth it strictly on a dollar amount.

With taxes, I have had some success keeping one main file, like "2011" and then everything that applies to taxes I throw it in it and then it's all in one place. Plus, I worked for H&R Block and even though an unethical company (because they do not genuinely inform their clients of third-party bank collection, and the paperwork would take an afternoon to read even if you are an extremely strong reader), it did have the side benefit of being less afraid of the IRS. Between owing a credit card company and owing the IRS, a lot to be said, better to owe the IRS! And do not sign an overly ambitious re-payment you may not be able to keep, better not to sign anything. (and also accounting types can have an amazingly dry sense of humor that I kind of like!)

I venture out to do shopping at nearly 11pm when the shop is emptier and nearly closing. I hate paying bills and dread anything going wrong that takes extra effort. I get a lot of anxiety and can't get a paid job. I wouldn't call myself independent but I suppose I am for doing those things. I do however rely on income support.