Haircuts are always painful for me...

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Haha. This is the first time I've heard others who also hate to go to the hairdressers. I thought I was the only one. xP

Ugh, it's always such a hassle for me... the worst part is that people LIKE my hair. Quite a bit, actually. It's really thick and curly, and I'm always getting asked if I dye it. I don't. They ask me what products I use, and I'm usually like "I dunno". I only want a haircut that's easy to manage, but they never seen to understand that message. So they'll usually start playing with my hair and styling it in all sorts of ways and fashions... it gets all poofed up and I come out looking like my hair got into a fight with a lawn mower and lost.

Add to this the general awkwardness that follows when they ask me all sorts of random personal questions and try to make small talk. I hate not being able to move for extended time and I hate having to have them wash my hair. My neck is always really sore afterward. It really doesn't matter how pleasant they try to make it... it just generally isn't fun. I only go to the hair dressers with my mom. Otherwise I avoid them like the plague. I only get haircuts a few times a year, if that.

I don't mind the process of getting a haircut itself, but why can't the hairdresser just let your hair dry on its own? I don't know HOW many times I go into places and say "I never blowdry my hair. NEVER. So could you please let it air dry?" They act like they are suddenly deaf and proceed to use the horrible blowdryer and then shellac my head w/product (which I don't use either).

UGH!

I'm going to buy some clippers and cut my own hair as Jack and Stuart suggest. A great idea... I guess I somehow thought someone must do it for you?

I have not had a haircut since the 90's because of how the clippers feel against my skin or because of the sound the scissors make. wshen I tell people this they think I am crazy.

DIY is the best answer, if the result is acceptable.
If not, a barber is the next best thing. No hair washing, quick, and small talk can be thwarted with a couple of grunting responses. People will often get the hint, if not, find another barber. My barber also does simple women's cuts.
I tell them a length, and that I trust them to use their judgment to do what they think looks best. This also goes a long way towards the "I'll tip you extra for every word you don't say"
Then I just wait til the end to tell them "No blow dry, no stuff other than water on it". I hate the smell of the stuff they want to use.

I must be weird, because I love getting my haircut. Not the social part of it at all, but I love the way the feel of scissors when they're trimming my hair. It's almost...soothing...

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Why they make me nervous:
1. I've let it grow out and now the barber knows it's shaggy.
2. "How do you want it cut?" -> I'm supposed to know how to answer that?
3. IF it's a girl, then I always get REALLY self conscious about her boobs being in lots of places they're not supposed to be, and I'm afraid that by being self conscious about it I'll do something that lets her know I'm self conscious about it. Really, I could care less about her boobs. But it's the thought that she could think I care about them that makes it awkward.
5. The TIP. I hate this everywhere. How much am I supposed to tip? I don't want to be rude.
6. People who cut your hair like to talk to you. So you should talk back. But it's just this big awkward 15 minute conversation. It's always strained.

Tips:
1. Take in a picture of you that was taken right after you got it cut last time, and say this is how you want your hair cut. SO much easier.
2. Get a guy, not a girl, to cut it. Not only do you avoid the whole "boob" thing I explained earlier, but usually a guy barber is gay, does a darn good job, is eccentric, and likes to talk. This is a good thing, because if he likes to talk, then number 3 below becomes much easier.
3. Get the barber into talking about himself. If you are able (Asperger's can make this difficult), get the barber to start talking about something he's interested in. If he's gay, this is so much easier. Ask him how his life is going, or ask him about some political movement or hippie movement or anything where he's going to go nuts talking about it. If he tries to bring you into the conversation, just say that you read about it and that you don't know much, and that's why you were asking him. (This is not a thing against gays. I'm just trying to be forthright here).
4. Barbers don't care that you have Asperger's. They're not going to cut your hair wrong either way. If they are gay, they are usually more understanding of people who are "different" and if you tell them upfront that hair cutting bothers you, and that you would prefer if they just talked to you about what's happened to them this week, then usually they're fine with that. DON'T tell them you're an aspie and thus want it to be quiet. That's just awkward for them too.
5. Ask what is a normal tip at a barber's shop, and then always pay a little more than what they say. Hope they aren't taking advantage of you.
6. Find a regular barber. This makes it sooo much easier as they get to know you, or at least your quirks, so you don't have to worry about a new face everytime often.
7. Remember, EVERYBODY finds the barber a little un-nerving. Even NT people. So the barber is naturally going to attempt to make you feel better by talking to you.

Mine is long because it's very curly and looks weird if it's any length between very short and very long, and if it's short, that means I have to keep getting it cut to keep it that way. I hate getting hair cuts for all the reasons mentioned, and because the person I always went to asked me what grade I was in every single visit until I quit going there when I was nearly 30.

i never could stand what most barbers did to my hair, they 1] didn't listen to me when i told them how i wanted it cut, they did it THEIR stupid way and they told me that if i didn't like it, to never return to their shop, which i obliged. so i bought a flowbee and have been using it for the past 20 years. a great invention, BTW. i keep my hair long in the wintertime, and use the flowbee only in the summer months.