Hah - to the OP - you'd have been brilliant at consoling an aspie. As far as I can tell, aspies would appreciate the intellectually-based rather than emotionally-based response, especially in a charged situation. I know I would. As for consoling others, I'm horrible at it to the point that I have told my NT relatives that I refuse to be part of another relative's slow death-by-cancer because I would be incredibly insensitive and we all know it. Better for everyone involved to just keep me away.
I find consoling people hard because it involves lies. You're supposed to say things like "it's okay" when it obviously isn't if the person's crying/screaming/whatever, and "it'll be okay" seems equally as impossible to guarantee. Though I understand some people just need to hear that, to comfort them despite its inherent untruth. It also confuses me because I'm thinking about how I'd like to be treated were I in their position, and what I'd like would probably be horrible for anyone normal. I suppose you could hug them and shut up? Who knows. It's a mine-field.
