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HDIGhere
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31 Aug 2006, 12:26 pm

Rosacoke wrote:
I would not turn my back on his desire to make friends - but obviously he needs some more training and practice. Is there a social skills group for college-aged Aspies that he could join? If not, maybe you could find a therapist that would be willing to start one. Some basic skills training should help him figure out what to do to avoid "scaring people away."
He also needs "safe places" to interact. My son has gone to "Magic - The Gathering" card tournaments over the years, and I think that's been a good experience. There are also some religious organizations that are very accepting and supportive, and they have different types and levels of social groups. And, as always, I like to recommend volunteering. In a volunteer situation, people are there because they want to be, they are happy to have help, there is a structured activity going on, and usually someone will tell you exactly what they want you to do. Working together in a low-stress situation can be a good basis for a friendship.


Thank you so much for your suggestions. I have tried most of them with the few places and people available but some people are willing. . . but in the long run their patience runs out.



HDIGhere
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31 Aug 2006, 12:32 pm

TheMachine1 wrote:
HDIGhere wrote:
TheMachine1 wrote:
What medication are you giving him for his sleep or what medication does he take
in general? What impairments does he have beside social skills problems? Did
he complete high school for example?


Due to the desires I described I have had to restart his medication of Haldol (this calms him and makes him sleep) and Cogentin (for the side effects of the Haldol).

He was functioning fairly well without meds for almost a year now having to restart him is hard and painful.

Unfortunately, he has not completed his academic education and he reads at a 5-6 year old in terms of his reading level.


Does he have tics is that why he takes Haldol? I've read good things about a drug
guanfacine. It can treat the hyper part of ADHD and the motor tics from
conditions like tourettes. Without alot of side effects. One common side effect it has is to make you feel tire(which might help your sons sleep).
Your might ask your doctor about it.


Well, I saw a "new and willing to help doctor" today.

After our discussion she took the list of medications recommended e.g guanfacine, in two weeks we will be trying new medications if necessary at all.



HDIGhere
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31 Aug 2006, 12:37 pm

Zeno wrote:
. . . However, failure in this regard can be extremely painful. Perhaps you can encourage him to participate on this forum more. Learning what it is like for other Aspies is a first step towards self awareness.


I am teaching him to chat on line.

To date his idea of chatting is typing "hello" and then the names of his present obsession for example, if it is animals . . . he will just type the names of animals one after the next, cat, dog, turtle. pig etc.

The great thing is I am still trying.



Fraya
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31 Aug 2006, 1:17 pm

Its good to keep trying but as others have stated putting him in social situations and having him actively trying to meet people usually doesnt go well.

The best way for a person with autism/AS to meet someone nice Ive found is to just be around and let them come to you (how to set up those sorts of situations is usually the hard part).

The people who would be nice to him are those who would be curious about him to start with and would initiate contact themselves.

Not to mention when a person is the one to start a conversation they are less likely to get scared off if it takes a turn for the strange I think.


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One pill makes you larger
And one pill makes you small
And the ones that mother gives you
Don't do anything at all
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HDIGhere
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02 Sep 2006, 7:25 am

Fraya wrote:
Its good to keep trying but as others have stated putting him in social situations and having him actively trying to meet people usually doesnt go well.

The best way for a person with autism/AS to meet someone nice Ive found is to just be around and let them come to you (how to set up those sorts of situations is usually the hard part).

The people who would be nice to him are those who would be curious about him to start with and would initiate contact themselves.

Not to mention when a person is the one to start a conversation they are less likely to get scared off if it takes a turn for the strange I think.


I agree with you in terms of "just be around and let them come to you" but my son longs to make friends such that he does not wait he approaches people and introduces himself.

The "strange" to those he meets appears to be "hey he is a handsome man/teenager but speaks like an elementary/primary child!"

What I love about my son is no matter how tough the rejection seems he keeps on trying. He is a brave warrior.