Do people forget about you?

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This has been a problem in my life. Friends move on, then I find it nearly impossible to make new ones. It gets irritating.

Some people do, some don't.

They used to.
I remember getting really upset because I was invited to go somewhere, then they said it was canceled, but then they decided to go anyways and forgot to re-invite me. That was upsetting. And just last week a person *asked* me if I were in line, I said yes, but there were some guys right beside me who said no so I guess she didn't hear me and thought I was part of that group and then she cut in line in front of me anyways like I wasn't even there. But someone else noticed that she did that and so it wasn't so bad. I'm too timid to say "Excuse me! I was in line!" So that happens a bit.

But now I have a friend who has a list of people to invite to things and I swear she goes down the list and I've always invited to her things. This has made me more social and now I've invited to more things too by other people. In fact, I could be at something tonight, but it is hell-week(otherwise known as final exams) and I have to study and taking a break with them would only tire me out more.

User1001, Your experience with being forgotten about by your friend when another one of their friends comes into play mimics my experiences to the t. In the rare occasion that I hang out with a friend, I'll be getting along with them ok, talking, usually trying to keep the focus on them and just listen carefully, since i'm slow to respond, and as soon as another one of their friends walks in I'm yesterday's news.

It's not like they just disengage with me, but they seem almost like a different person when they're talking to their other friend. I can talk facts and philosophies, but I can't connect.

Wow, this is all too familiar!

I have recently tried to call an old friend and he keeps saying he'll call me back and never does.

I have had NTs turn away from me and start a conversation when I had not finished talking. It's like they don't like talking to me and would rather start a new conversation than talk to me, even though I hadn't even gotten to my point yet.

Sometimes I don't want to talk at all. When I do feel comfortable enough to open up, it's like the floodgates have opened up and I talk too much. That's when the NTs seem to become tired of listening.

I think that my voice can be a monotone. It sounds that way to me when I hear a recording of my voice. I also think that I may give too many details when I get going.

Used to happen to me very often during grade school, I found a way to reduce it by basically forcing people to recognize my presence. Calling them by name and moving into their personal space. These days when it does happen most of the time its not worth the extra effort so I just move away and do something productive. Fortunately it happens less often now and I've found that speaking clearly and not in the usual monotone can help but in those high energy groups of people if you can't match their level of enthusiasm chances are you'll just be left there all alone.

When I was young people used to forget about me. I wrote about it once and went on about how I had mastered the fine art of being invisible. As I got older, my appearance made me stand out (for years I had jewelry in my face and often had purple or fire engine red hair) and that made people stare at me and remember me. Sometimes random people still come up to me and know me from jr. high and I have no idea who they are. They sure remember me though. I do not speak much (sometimes I am mute), so I am generally left out of conversations around me, but I like it because I have such a hard time with multiple people conversations. I also forget about other people, so I do not mind when people forget about me. I think if I had too much attention coming my way, I would freak out.

Even though I'm 43, and married, people are STILL forgetting that I exist! And this makes me feel both very hurt and angry, too!
I've gotten to where I have to make phone calls, often, to just remind people "Hey, I asked you kindly to remember me (in whatever way), so why was I forgotten on (some piece of mail, or on an invitation)?!"
Believe me, I KNOW what that feels like, and am STILL trying to get past what amounts to other people just "leaving me out", or "forgetting I exist".
So, user1001 (and everyone! ), I know how it feels, all too well.
(HEY, did I leave anyone out!??)

Sorry for bringing this post back but it's a topic that's been aggravating me lately. I guess this might be an Asperger's thing, too, so that's why it bothers me. Over the years I've had this habit of befriending people, helping them out, buying them things and just generally trying to be there for them when they had no one else or were suffering from low self esteem. But then it never fails. As soon as they meet someone new they forget about me like a dog in the street. I can't stand it. It hurts like the dickens. It's often to the point that I'm extremely reticent about meeting people as they'll simply abandon me like a lost cause in the end. Very disappointing. This is an aspie thing, right?

I agree that we are easy targets for users, selfish people, and narcissists (cluster B personalities). We are like prey to them as they are predatory. They will use you until they use you up or get bored with you. Just like a cat playing with a mouse. It's not right but these people pretty much don't care because they have either a defective conscience or NO conscience at all.

We "think" that others have good motives like we do, but many do not. We have to keep our guard up to prevent being victimized or bullied.

If you find someone who understands and accepts you just as you are, you are lucky and should treasure that relationship / friendship.

I've had this experience through most of school, ever since I was a little kid. I never had friends stick around long and never was invited to spend time with them or anything, and when I asked to spend time with both my friends and my ex it always seemed like only if they can't think of anything else to do. People usually don't go out of their way to talk to me either, and I'm very quiet and shy. My whole life I've felt like I was the lowest priority to most people. This is why I love animals so much though, because my pets look up to me and never forget about me. They are always happy to see me

My case is a bit inverse: I don't initiate, but people don't forget me. Even I never interacted with them, they remember me. Even as a mere passerby... Quite the case in my childhood, and more so at this present.

They're the ones who initiates the interaction. And even last an expression to them just after a moment of talking with them. They recall most things that I've said even time passes, they end up assuming stuff but I'm glad it's nothing misleading.

But if anything else, I prefer to be nondescript or forgettable. Sure being memorable has it's perks, but there's a downside to it.

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As a teen I was extremely passive in socializing with others. What I mean by passive is that I never spoke a word unless someone asked me a questions which required an answer. You see, I have problems with being ignored so that comes natural to me - to display an answer! Unfortunately, due to my ASD, I sometimes said inappropriate things without thinking about it, which lead me to being bullied in classroom (without teachers reacting).

No one seemed to understand me and it took until after high school for me to get an aspie diagnosis. When I got the diagnosis two of my friends turned their backs towards me. That hurt a lot but they were not genuine friends.

I would not say that people forget about me but people do not understand that I feel that way. At party's I never get a chance to join the debate, leading me to feel left-out. I think I understand how a majority of people think about such a situation. They think that at a party when there is so many people around a person like me should not dictate the debate (probably since I am can be boring talking about my special interests and projects). It's sad that people think like that because why should I not be allowed to enjoy a party?

The last few years I have left my little bubble and become more talk-active around other people. But in groups I will always be left-over, much because I cannot get hold of the topic of discussion.