Can you tell when people are lying?

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Not really but sometimes I can. I have to actually know about something to know when something is BS. If something sounds unreal, I can tell because I then have a hard time believing it but I always give people a benefit of a doubt.

I also take things as a grain of salt after learning people don't say what they mean like "Oh we should do this some time" or when people say "later" or when they say anything. I always wonder if it was another way of saying something else like the time this one woman told me "Excuse me, do you realize you just cut in front of all these people?" and years later I realized if it was her nice way of telling me I cut in front of those people and back then I took it as a question and I apologized and got behind all those people. I even said I thought this was the end of the line because of the huge gap. So it's not like I read between the lines, I just know it's not nice to cut in line and because I did, I had to get to the back of the line so I didn't even need to be told to get in the back of the line. It's like I am no longer a literal thinker and can now read between the lines. It's just me being all paranoid and assuming and doubting everything people say and making up what they maybe are really saying. I wonder if this is how NTs really live and it took me until 25 years of age to finally develop this skill?


But I have found out later I was lied to. I even suspect my ex may have played mind games with me and did manipulation and sometimes I wonder if my last ex may have lied too. Just some things don't add up anymore after learning new information like I found out this place up on the hill does do diagnosing in adults for autism and my ex said they do not make it official up there because they only do that to kids. Well I have met people from my autism group who were diagnosed up there as adults. Either my ex was lying or the doctor was so full of it that told him that. Even Roger Meyers was diagnosed up there too by the same psychiatrist who diagnosed me. He is now retired. He retired a few years later after he diagnosed me. But one thing I know that was BS was when my last ex claimed he can't lie but yet he has lied about his medical condition because he was afraid he get made fun of so yes he can lie. If you can lie about that, you can lie in other things too.

But I am always skeptical about those as seen on TV ads.

Yes I can tell most of the time. I can also tell what they're telling is a lie but they truly believe it (they have been lied to). I'm rather old though and very experienced with manipulative people. I don't think I was as good when I was young. That's the good thing about aging for aspies, you might be behind in maturity compared to other people, but you can still learn from experience. As eventually you'll get it.

Well, in reference to television advertisements:

Everything is a lie.

Yea. That's usually the give-away.

Body language isn't that reliable for lie detection anyways. Some people will appear nervous whether they are lying or telling the truth while others can come up with the most clever BS story on the spot without showing any emotion or effort. Overcompensation to hide nervousness can be a good signal that someone is lying though.

People can "contradict" themselves but it doesn't mean they are. I have been accused of it when I didn't even do it so that's how I know. It's because of my communication problems or they were too ignorant to know they misunderstood me and I made myself clear so they thought I said one thing and then another. That is when I learned sometimes it better if you don't defend or explain yourself because then people will just go on thinking you have contradicted yourself. So it's best to let them think what they think. But that always drives me crazy because it always feels like I am being dishonest but I still leave it be.

Sometimes people have bad memories so they are going to say one thing and then another when they tell about their past. Like the time my ex said his manager's daughter threw his son in the ditch when he was eight and then he said he was seven when it happened. I asked him about that and he got defensive going "whatever, I don't remember, seven or eight he was when it happened." After hearing contradicting information and asking about it, people usually say they don't remember so I have concluded it's bad memories people have so some details are going to change. It doesn't mean they are lying. They just have a bad memory. That just means I take their stories as grain of salt because I don't know what is true and what isn't.

I am sure people think I am lying because I get nervous or my communication problems or no eye contact or not the correct eye contact.

Even on TV I have learned when people stutter, it's because they are lying because they are trying to make up a story. But that isn't really true, same as when people take too long to answer when you ask them something because they are trying to think of a lie to spare your feelings. But that isn't always true either.

But I am also guilty of thinking someone is lying when I see contradictions but not when it comes to the examples I said above.

Depends on how far-fetched and obvious they are being... not by their facial expressions... usually yes I can see through lies.

Same here, if somebody says they'll do something for me, I take it with a grain of salt now, unless they're already a close friend or an ASD individual.

Sometimes I cringe inside when somebody tells me a lie just to sound polite, but I reluctantly accept it just to avoid creating further tensions.

Nope. I may be slow to answer a question because I have a slower auditory processing speed which may be even worse if I'm distracted with other thoughts while someone pops a question. I also stutter and stumble over words regardless of whether I'm telling the truth.

One thing I have noticed though is that when some people lie they overcompensate. If you catch someone that looks like they might be deliberately trying to appear more confident than they really are they may be lying. Spreading out syllables and not using contractions might be one sign.