Spent formative years being told to be someone else?
LuckyLeft
Sea Gull
Joined: 17 Jul 2011
Age: 33
Gender: Male
Posts: 203
Location: Southeast Georgia, United States
I think aspies need to be raised with a correct identity. You cant just tell us who we are and expect us to follow it. You have to realize the type of person we are and help us learn how to cope and function keeping in mind who we are as individuals. If you tell us to be someone else, we're either gonna fail trying or gonna turn into complete chameleons without a sense of real identity.
Person I was told to be: shy, sweet, nice, quiet, obedient, polite
Person I am: still shy, opinionated, blunt, somewhat argumentative, a random quirky weirdo
Overlap: shy and socially naive
Wow. This sounds just like me. Except the Person I Am session: I can be argumentative, questioning things, yet I hate conflict
And Yes, they're has to be a better way than just some 'Trail and Error' process for us on the ASD for trying to fit in.
I went for years thinking I had 'fit in', and when actuality, I never did. People treated me different from everyone else, and the people who were 'nice' to me, their friends would have nothing to do with me. I don't know if it was because of me being considered "Lame". Not really trusting of anyone now, because how naive I was and still can be too trusting
Wow. That sounds like it really sucks. *gives big hug to anyone who wants it*
My mom taught me how to fake being NT, but she was pretty supportive of me being weird. So it wasn't as bad as it could have been. Still sucked, but at least my mom was awesome. I love my mom. XD
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Now if only I could think of a witty signature...
I am an adoptee. I was DEFINITLY told in my formative years to be someone I am not. And aspergers has nothing to do with that, that's just the way it is for adoptees. Strangers buy you and then pretend that you are their child, and guilt trip you/brain wash you - into playing along. The added bonus is, my real identity is kept a secret from me. Locked up in a vault in the state capitol. Yes. The adoption thing messed me up, and that's in addition to the asperger's thing. Thank God I did find my biological relatives, or I may never have put two and two together about the aspergers
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{the avatar is a Claude Monet}
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