Not allowed to go to many places by myself?

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Joined: 10 Jul 2010
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30 Jul 2011, 7:09 am

Can't they just let you go and make sure you have a phone so you can ring them if you do have a meltdown? What's the worst that could happen? I rarely ever go to my parents' place because I like having my own place to live in and my own rules to live by. I have a feeling that they're just being controlling for the sake of it. Some people's parents just like having control over them. Gives them some sense of power or something. Really, what is the worst that can happen? You get upset in a public place and make lots of noise? Do you have a card or engraved piece of jewelry that explains that you have autism? I have both.

nikki15
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30 Jul 2011, 8:18 am

When I was younger, my grandparents didn't let me go places alone. I was either with them or with friends. I was afraid to go places alone, but now I prefer to be by myself.

ocdgirl123
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30 Jul 2011, 12:40 pm

John_Browning wrote:

ocdgirl123 wrote:

My parents said that I can live with them until I feel ready to move out. The post-secondary institution I would like to go to is close to home so it won't be a problem.

SammichEater, my parents only let me go to the mall alone, and only the local malls too.

The mall sounds like a strange place to be the only place they will let you go alone if they are afraid you will have a meltdown. Perhaps ask them why they feel it's safe to let you go to the mall? But don't say anything about other places, just ask about the mall alone, and get back to us if they say anything.

No, I don't have meltdowns because of noise and crowds. I have only had a meltdown at the mall , once. I think my parents don't want me going to places where there are lot of kids (preteen and younger) without parents, such as the swimming pool. Also, they don't want me going to faraway places, and I get lost a lot, and they don't want me getting lost. (I know where the malls are)

ocdgirl123
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30 Jul 2011, 12:44 pm

VMSmith wrote:

my parents were almost as strict when i was your age. they let me go to the city alone though so long as i had a mobile, came back well before dark and didnt go to anything political or gay or otherwise objectionable to them. they still do that now but im allowed a little more leeway with how late i come if it is for uni or only once in a while. ive never gone to a club or bar but i think they would only let me if i went with a friend. they still freak out if i dont answer my phone. this is not because im an aspie, its because they are overprotective, sexist and im female. your parents really should let you out more at this age. how can they expect you to cope on your own if you are not exposed to the world? how can you enjoy life if you have no control over it? do you think they'd let you go to places that you dont associate danger with alone like the library, museums, art galleries, zoos, aquariums, etc so they slowly get used to the idea of you going out or are they really that prohibitive of your freedom?

Like many of said, I am scared to go places alone, I think they will probably let me go places alone when I become an adult.

2ukenkerl
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30 Jul 2011, 10:25 pm

ocdgirl123 wrote:

Like many of said, I am scared to go places alone, I think they will probably let me go places alone when I become an adult.

Actually, they let you go a fair number of places alone. I am male, considered kind of tall, and was a teenager in a better environment. Although even at 8, I had a lot of freedom.

Assuming that you are reasonably intelligent, careful, and a fair height/weight for yur age, they MAY be more permissive with you NOW, than they would have even 2 years ago,

One bit of advice. DON'T scream much, and don't scream until you are SURE. Screaming migt not help, and it is LESS likely to help if you are known as a screamer, etc...

MOST of the recovered kids have said they have screamed. It DIDN'T help. So be careful.

ocdgirl123
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31 Jul 2011, 1:49 am

I wasn't all that serious about the screaming. I was kind of joking.

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Todesking
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31 Jul 2011, 12:42 pm

My parents limited where I could go when I was a kid all the way up to when I was 15. It limited where I could go with friends and kept me from making new friends. When I turned 16 I hung out at a local roleplaying game shop and made tons of new friends that were geeks and not trouble makers so I was no longer getting into trouble. My old friends I made around my house were getting into all types of trouble such as burglaries, shop lifting, and weed dealing growing up with these friends I tended to "dabble" in these activities.

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ocdgirl123
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31 Jul 2011, 1:08 pm

I asked my parents if I could go to the movie theatre alone as it is in walking distance from our house. They said "yes".

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syrella
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31 Jul 2011, 1:26 pm

I'm allowed to go places alone, but for the longest time I never would.

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31 Jul 2011, 1:31 pm

2ukenkerl wrote:

One bit of advice. DON'T scream much, and don't scream until you are SURE. Screaming migt not help, and it is LESS likely to help if you are known as a screamer, etc...

Try something else, like "Fire!" or "Rape!' or something like that.

2ukenkerl
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31 Jul 2011, 4:32 pm

Tequila wrote:

2ukenkerl wrote:

One bit of advice. DON'T scream much, and don't scream until you are SURE. Screaming migt not help, and it is LESS likely to help if you are known as a screamer, etc...

Try something else, like "Fire!" or "Rape!' or something like that.

STILL, SPARINGLY!

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31 Jul 2011, 4:45 pm

For me, it's not so much that I'm not allowed to go anywhere by myself, but that I have no method of transportation. Everything is at least a good 10 miles in either direction. I don't have my full drivers license yet (5 more days ), so whenever I drive, it is required by state law that someone is in the car with me.