Help me understand AS behaviors better...

Post Reply New Topic

1. Describe how you would greet another person you encounter that you've never met before, from your own perspective including your feelings during the greeting and what is important/not important to you.

It depends on if they greet me first or not, if they don't greet me first then I just don't...but if they approach me I just watch what they do and try to do the same. like though I am not fond of hand shakes if someone puts their hand out for one then I'll do it or if they just say hi and introdoce themself I do the same....but yeah its pretty much impossible for me to iniciate social interaction unless its in a setting like a store where your supposed to obviously approach the cash register employee to buy your stuff for instance.

2. What are the most important factors to you in determining if someone is your friend?

Are they around even if I don't have something they want?...that is usually a good indicator, those who still express intrest in a friendship even when you don't have something material they want are friends.

3. How do you react if someone calls you by the wrong name, or a nickname?

I am usually pretty indifferent, unless I feel it is nessisary I correct them......like if they are confusing my name with someone elses or whatever.

4. In your opinion, is it ever ok for anyone to lie?

Yeah

5. How do you react/what does it feel like if you have to walk through a crowded mall, filled with lots of shoppers and there is loud music playing in the background?

Well if I like the music I avoid the crowd as best I can and enjoy the music......if I hate the music and its crowded I am likely to leave or at least go outside to smoke a ciggerette.

6. Describe what you would do and/or say to get another person's attention?

This is a bit weird if I know someone long enough I just say their name, otherwise I'll just direct what I say at them or I might use the word dude.....lol. I usually hope people don't notice that I am not using their name at all for the first few months I know them because I don't know how to explain that its hard for me to use peoples names when talking to them and its embarrasing.

7. Describe your reaction if someone looks you straight in the eye for more than a few sustained seconds.

People even those who know me are lucky if they even get to look me straight in the eye......but I do try to make more eye contact with people I know especially when I get comfortable enough around them to do so.

I would smile and say ''hello'', if they hold their hand out I would shake it, but I don't attempt to do it first. While I'm saying hello, I quickly study their face and do a quick mental judgement. I feel quite good inside when I have completed a friendly greeting. I don't like to start of conversation, since I'm afraid of doing or saying the wrong thing, so it's better if they started any conversation off, and then I would carry it on.


(Don't quite understand question)


I don't mind nicknames, but I get annoyed if somebody calls me a slightly different name, (like Jodie instead of Josie)


Depends on what the situation is.


Very daunting for me. Not so much the music, but more so all the people. I have breathing problems and butterflies in my stomach when a big hoard of people are coming towards me and I've got to walk through them. If people didn't keep looking at me, I think I will be OK.


Usually I don't like using a person's name, but as a last resort I just have to, so I tend to call their name if I need to get their attention. I don't like to wave because I keep thinking other people will think I'm waving to them and some might get annoyed and keep looking at me to see why I was waving (I avoid stares, not encourage them).


I don't know, eye contact comes naturally to me (unless I think about it at the time), so I think I just look back and blink.

a child of the mtv generation ( you need to be a Simpsons fan to understand)

I say don't fight it guys , go with it, their sure are a lot of sell outs around here.

1. Describe how you would greet another person you encounter that you've never met before, from your own perspective including your feelings during the greeting and what is important/not important to you.
It's usually other people who take initiative to greet me. I can't remember names for the life of me in a group situation. I can do the proper body language, smile, nod, shake hands, eye-contact etc... but my actual feelings are rather flat compared to others (I suspect). If I really want to get to know someone I have to prompt myself to ask questions as it doesn't come naturally.

Basically I know the proper things to do to avoid being perceived as rude or completely uninterested, and I expect the same of others. I have trouble getting beyond simple politeness to the point of actually connecting with anyone in most situations though. I can't maintain a conversation that has no personal interest to me. I prefer to get to know people by doing something together.

2. What are the most important factors to you in determining if someone is your friend?
I would say when there is a sense of shared experience. I need to have something in common with someone to really call them a friend. Feelings of mutual respect and camaraderie are also important.

3. How do you react if someone calls you by the wrong name, or a nickname?
If it's an accident I correct them in a gentle way. I'd say something like "well that's pretty close". Basically I try not to act like I'm offended or act in a way that could embarrass them.

4. In your opinion, is it ever ok for anyone to lie?
Yes. In my experience, people who say it's never ok to lie simply have a much looser definition of honesty than me. The truth of the matter is it's not even possible to survive in this world while adhering to a strict code of 100% honesty.

5. How do you react/what does it feel like if you have to walk through a crowded mall, filled with lots of shoppers and there is loud music playing in the background?
I feel uncomfortably tense. The sound of people talking loudly tends to bother me more than loud music. I also feel irritable and impatient around crowds of people. Usually I can eventually relax if I'm forced to stay in a noisy and/or crowded environment long enough. It does tend to tire me out though.

6. Describe what you would do and/or say to get another person's attention?
Raise my hand, look up, try to make eye contact. I don't like having to yell to get someone's attention in a noisy environment.

7. Describe your reaction if someone looks you straight in the eye for more than a few sustained seconds.
Depending on the person and their expression I'd probably find it highly distracting and/or intimidating. I have to look away and/or de-focus my eyes in order to think straight.

1. I would require information on the context in order to answer this question.
2. Is my life better for their presence in it, and do we speak with each other?
3. Depending on the person and context I'd either ignore it or give a blank stare.
4. I lie, sometimes just for fun. Of course I consider it to be ok.
5. Unpleasant, but tolerable.
6. Depends on the situation. Probably a tap on the shoulder.
7. If I noticed, I'd probably return the gaze.

1. Describe how you would greet another person you encounter that you've never met before, from your own perspective including your feelings during the greeting and what is important/not important to you.
   In most cases I wouldn't greet another person that I'd never met before unless doing so was absolutely necessary to accomplish some goal. If they spoke to me first to ask me a question I would answer. If it was for a job interview or for work I'd reach out to shake their hand, make sure my palm was face up, and say "Nice to meet you."
   
2. What are the most important factors to you in determining if someone is your friend?
   I don't understand the question.
   
3. How do you react if someone calls you by the wrong name, or a nickname?
   I'm not sure if you mean that a person would be calling me by the wrong name in an attempt to get my attention or if I was already paying attention to them. If they called me the wrong name in an attempt to get my attention I wouldn't respond. If they called me the wrong name when I already had their attention I may be confused and think that they're referring to someone else or I may be bothered but unless I knew that I would have to have further interaction with the person wouldn't tell them.
   
   The name I go by is a nickname. When I was younger I would correct people if they called me "Matt" instead of "Matthew", but one person would not stop calling me "Matt" and eventually I stopped going by my proper name. Now it feels strange for people to refer to me by my proper name.
   
4. In your opinion, is it ever ok for anyone to lie?
   Yes.
   
5. How do you react/what does it feel like if you have to walk through a crowded mall, filled with lots of shoppers and there is loud music playing in the background?
   The people are annoying because they get in the way. Many of them walk very slowly and they don't get out of the way. The music is annoying because it's too loud or sometimes painful. The store employees often follow me and I try to get away from them if possible. I walk very much faster than most people seem to walk, and I try to make sure there are things between the employees and me so that it would be difficult for the employees to walk toward me.
   
6. Describe what you would do and/or say to get another person's attention?
   Unless I was extremely far away from a person I wouldn't say anything. I would walk closer to the person until the person saw me and started talking. If the person is extremely far away and it was an extremely important I would yell their name. If it is extremely important but I don't know their name I would yell "Hey!"
   
7. Describe your reaction if someone looks you straight in the eye for more than a few sustained seconds.
   I think about why they're looking in my eyes. I don't know why. I want to look away, and I have trouble concentrating on what they're saying.