Bond between aspies

Post Reply New Topic

I do feel a "bond" of sorts when I talk to people on here who experience similar AS issues as I do, but if I were to meet someone in person and know that they were on the spectrum, I don't think I'd feel an automatic bond unless they were into discussing how it's affected both of us/talking abut NTs, haha.

Alas, I don't know any autistic people in person.

My whole life I had this feeling that I was odd. When I was younger I developed a strength by helping others who were picked on as I was. It has been an unconscious mission in my life to help others like myself. I can help them to not only accept who they are but to revel in it and enjoy the fact that they are different and have strengths that others don't.

When I dated, I looked for men who were "odd". I thought that I was so "damaged" that I could never have a "normal" relationship with a normal man. So I instinctually chose AS men. Lonliness is one of the things I looked for, because of how lonely I felt. I wanted someone to identify with. I didn't realize that helping them ... was helping myself.

Now that I know that this has been my issue, my self esteem, my loneliness, and my insecurities are all subsiding. However, my need to help others like myself is manifesting itself into the desire to volunteer to help with an autistic/AS group. I have been researching groups in my area.

I have been bonding with Aspies all my life. I find that we help each other tremendously. Understanding them helps me to understand myself.

Not really, I don't think so. I think it's a common myth. I just don't understand how could I bond with someone who is an aspie and obsessed with firetrucks while, at the same time, I want to talk about cell biology. We would only find each other annoying.
I don't want to say that connection isn't possible, I just don't think it has more potential of success than connection with NT.

Actually, I don't know any other Aspies with ASD dx around me in real life, although all the people I can connect with have similar quirks than me. This may indicate that some of them might be on the spectrum or in the gray zone. I would say, similar personality and shared interests are important for success.

Some Aspies or Semi-Aspies (half-NT half-Aspie, in the gray zone) can have really difficult personal characteristics. Examples are my father and my uncle-in-low. They are a little tricky to get along with and tolerate misbehavior on their side. Others I know can have really pleasant personalities, except the inevitable occasions they too misbehave due to overload...

So, the answer is no.