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Should Aspies date NTs?
Of Course. We need someone to do the talking 17%  17%  [ 11 ]
Love is Blind. It shouldnt matter 77%  77%  [ 51 ]
No. They just don't understand 6%  6%  [ 4 ]
Total votes : 66

OJani
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28 Feb 2012, 7:02 am

This topic is always interesting to me, and although it's sad I can't write anything positive from my experience (yet), I fully enjoy reading about what others have!


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Bun
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28 Feb 2012, 7:03 am

I never actually dated a diagnosed Aspie, so I guess the answer is 'yes, I would'.


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Mithos
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28 Feb 2012, 7:05 am

Dating is a mythological concept to me. I've never been on a date. I do wonder what it would be like though.

Edit: Oh yeah, I did go on a date once, It turned out it was a "School dare". Boy was I depressed after that, High School sucked...a lot.


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naturalplastic
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28 Feb 2012, 10:47 am

Keyman wrote:
naturalplastic wrote:
it cant hurt.


Very naive!


Au Contrere

The other person already thinks of you as a wierdo.

There only three consequences of telling them you're an aspie

If they find out you're a aspie they will either (a) think the same of you because they already knew you're odd, or (b) think better of you.

The third (c) option of them rejecting you because they learned the redundant piece of information that they already knew that you're odd is less likely, but how would it be a problem if that did that?

If they did think less of you then theyre worthless and theyre doing you a favor if they dump you because you shouldve dumped them first.



But to answer the question in the OP- since NT's are over 90 percent of the population and fellow aspies are only one percent- there isnt alot of choice. If you date at all -if you're an aspie or not its going to be with an nt.



kx250rider
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28 Feb 2012, 12:30 pm

The only problem is when the NT doesn't understand us, and gets hurt feelings when we don't pick up on their needs by body language, etc. They might think we're not attracted to them, or that we aren't liking what they're doing for us, etc etc. We Aspies must keep it a BIG PRIORITY to communicate in whatever capacity we can, with our significant others, and prevent hurt feelings. I would venture to guess based on my own dating experience, that 99% of Aspie/NT relationships which do not succeed, were doomed by misunderstanding after misunderstanding.

Charles



Keyman
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28 Feb 2012, 9:10 pm

naturalplastic wrote:
If they find out you're a aspie they will either (a) think the same of you because they already knew you're odd, or (b) think better of you.

The third (c) option of them rejecting you because they learned the redundant piece of information that they already knew that you're odd is less likely, but how would it be a problem if that did that?


(d) They tell the whole neighborhood that you are a certified weird-ball unsuitable for any mating purposes. Consequence of that is prejudgment when you meet another person.

naturalplastic wrote:
But to answer the question in the OP- since NT's are over 90 percent of the population and fellow aspies are only one percent- there isnt alot of choice. If you date at all -if you're an aspie or not its going to be with an nt.


AS to NT ratio is approximately 1 to 1000 last time I read.



AllenVincent
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29 Feb 2012, 4:01 pm

Didn't vote as to restrictive for me. Had some awesome gals in my time..... seriously hot, sometimes without even realising they liked me at the beginning lol but alas.... communication.... .damn communication....... one of my... someone I think of at some point almost daily for over ten years..... she left because "why are you not upset"..... " I don't want you to go, I'm screaming inside me, of course I am upset " ........ she thought I was not bothered.....wtf ! Then only found out in 2010 that my face does not display my emotions properly..... ARGH ! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!

Life is a b***h sometimes! This person texts me sometimes that she hates me because she hasn't found anyone better than me ARGH!! !!



Keyman
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29 Feb 2012, 5:20 pm

AllenVincent wrote:
This person texts me sometimes that she hates me because she hasn't found anyone better than me ARGH!! !!


So why don't she go back? ;)



AllenVincent
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29 Feb 2012, 5:26 pm

She's Irish and Catholic.......... plus......she's had a kid since.... so rightly or wrongly... I know... I KNOW............I could not look at her kid as my own..... we all met up in London... mad times but anyway........ sigh... this girl was my angel... she was my.... that somebody to die and kill for......... she was no longer pure to me...... I KNOW I'm hurting myself more here..... she was probably the only one I was truly 100% loyal to and it is something I don't know how to put right BUT we've reached... some sort of peaceful compromise.... sort off..... We'll have a race on our gold plated zimmer frames if we're still around when we're 70 odd lol :lol:



Keyman
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29 Feb 2012, 6:16 pm

Find another ;)



AllenVincent
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29 Feb 2012, 6:24 pm

I'm probably in some ways a male tart lol must be my nose lol At one point I was seeing a lot in one month.. it was a joke.... it was as if I lost the ability or confidence to decide who I liked the most so tried to keep all of them lol cowardly I know... stupid to as the quality of the relationships/flings were not great. Anyway going to bed now, nite nite everyone.



lostgirl1986
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29 Feb 2012, 6:31 pm

I don't see why not. Everybody is a different individual with a different personality. Not to mention Asperger's Syndrome ranges on a very broad spectrum from lower functioning-higher functioning, like I said everybody is different. Whose to tell you who you can or cannot date. I can see pros and cons both way. If you're an aspie dating a NT, that NT might be more outgoing and social which may help you to bring out more of your social side. If you're an aspie dating an aspie you'd have somebody to relate to. Some people who have Asperger's Syndrome are really good at covering it up as well.



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29 Feb 2012, 6:34 pm

Mithos wrote:
Dating is a mythological concept to me. I've never been on a date. I do wonder what it would be like though.

Edit: Oh yeah, I did go on a date once, It turned out it was a "School dare". Boy was I depressed after that, High School sucked...a lot.


Kids can be cruel. :(