What type of nonverbal problems do you have?

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I'm good with reading body language and I'm quick at it too, but it's how to react to it what is the problem.

I'm better at reacting to jokes because I can just laugh, which is acceptable. But if somebody said a nasty remark to me, I would immediately know that something bad is being said to me, but I can never react properly in good time. And I have difficulties standing up for myself anyway because I know that every time I stand up for myself it always backfires.

I can't process in real time. It could take hours to realize what somebody meant so it's almost like I don't have sufficient info anyway.

I'm trying to understand if there are different things going on. I can understand nonverbals in realtime but I lack a shared context so miss between-the-lines stuff, but I think this is just the same as receiving full information and being slow to process it. But then there might be something different where you don't receive full information. Although I'm not sure that even makes sense. Of course you receive full information, unless you're blind or deaf. This is difficult to think through.

I got 34/36

Wife got em' all.

Time wise we buzzed right through them.

To chime in, I can't read it consistently in real time when I'm on an ADD down turn....

I remember scoring low on that test, 19 I think. I don't have the patience and I just take guesses when I look at the eyes. In real life I hardly ever look at eyes and they tell me nothing.

I can seem to learn body language but I have a hard time reading it when it happens. I can also figure out what the person meant later on and what their intentions were when I keep thinking bout it but the situation has been long over. My mind works too slow and it can't seem to do two things at once. Heck I even take things literal even though I know what they meant. I don't know why that happens. But I have no idea if I act appropriately in them. People can joke with me and I don't know it. I also wonder if my brain knows someone is joking but I am slow at realizing it so that would explain why I laugh while I didn't know the person was joking. My husband just assumes I knew it was a joke.

Receive insufficient information and struggle to process it in realtime.

What makes you think it's not just the second one?

People sometimes point out things about social situations that I completely missed.

Can you give an example?

Attention.

The crudest example I can think of is that not looking someone in the face at the right time for only just a couple of seconds means you did miss crucial non-verbal information. Now combining that with the almost universal parental concern for kids on the spectrum about that they do not or do not reliable look at what is pointed out to them (because the children don't understand, feel too stressed looking at it and need a break or are momentarily occupied with something else that caught their interest) means there is a possibility that certain parts of information are lost entirely.

I also miss out on some non-verbal information because I don't have the intuitive semi-concious impulse to direct my attention at what other people pay attention to (or direct my attention to them). Doing it intentionally means I am missing out on a tiny amount of possibly meaningful non-verbal information even if no one notices my delay and if by all means, my reaction is "fast" which it usually is. I hate to admit it but intuition here wins out over intention in terms of speed (milliseconds? microseconds?).

Ah, good point. I wonder how much of a factor that is.

Sometimes yes, to both. Sometimes, no..
I need more & specific choices/examples to choose from here.

Matthew

Receive full information but struggle to process it in realtime.

I have a hard time processing what it means. Cause it can mean so many things. The easiest one is when people say "Yes", but shake their head "No". Cognitive dissonance.

It gets more complicated when they say things like "I firmly believe" and they shake their head yes and no on certain parts. Which would mean somethings they don't believe and other things they do believe and I get confused very fast.

I learned a new one, when people cross their arms around themselves they could be cold or defensive. So I simply ask, "Are you cold?" if they respond No, they are defensive about something.