Just read the study from 2009: Aspies have TOO MUCH Empathy

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27 Apr 2012, 1:36 am

Unlike what many people have said on WP, eye contact doesn't make me uncomfortable or feel like an invasion. It has no effect on me. Maybe that fits in with my lack of hyperemotionality. But I don't make eye contact like NTs do. I didn't make it or look at faces when I was a kid, and now I stare when I remember to make eye contact, and I do a lot of eye wandering up down corners, or I forget to make eye contact and have an unfocused look at the air between me and other. I never fake eye contact, but always look at people's eyeballs.

Without the hyperemotionality, how does the intense world hypothesis eggsplain my eggstreme social aloofness and lack of communication in childhood? Eberry red flag of autism, I had, but I can't find the hyperemotionality in myself as a child or adult, as was described according to the hypothesis to account for social withdrawal. It was more like lack of social and communication instinct for me, I think. Or was the hyperemotionality so strong in infancy that it shut down my emotions, and I can't feel them? But that makes no sense either, because I can feel simple pure emotions intensely, but almost none of the social emotions that NTs are constantly eggschanging with each other to have intuitive social cognition and lots of social behaviors. Or was it my ability to feel others' emotions shutdown after hyperemotional overload in infancy, and that was why I didn't interact to develop social cognition and was so aloof and uncommunicative in childhood?

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27 Apr 2012, 2:03 am

Well I score 115 on impulse control. If I let go I feel emotions. One that I can't control is Embarrassment, when someone pays me a complement, because I don't like it when they draw attention to me like that. Everyone is good at something. No need to maybe put one of them down, if they feel like that. Also sometimes I try to fully control not smiling too, when jokes are been told. Also all my Extroversion Traits ones are low.

I don't have any problem looking in someone’s eyes. I have also not done anything wrong, so I don't have anything to hide maybe.

People seem to think your trying to read they mind? That a signal they want to hide something, out of fear you will find out.

Impulse Control:- 115
Control one's emotions, not interrupt others, maintain tact & restraint in social situations.

Empathy:- 40
Sympathy :- 31
Nurturance:- 75

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Last edited by TechnoDog on 27 Apr 2012, 2:07 am, edited 1 time in total.

XFilesGeek
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27 Apr 2012, 2:07 am

I definitely do NOT have too much empathy.

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27 Apr 2012, 2:09 am

btbnnyr wrote:

Without the hyperemotionality, how does the intense world hypothesis eggsplain my eggstreme social aloofness and lack of communication in childhood? Eberry red flag of autism, I had, but I can't find the hyperemotionality in myself as a child or adult, as was described according to the hypothesis to account for social withdrawal. It was more like lack of social and communication instinct for me, I think. Or was the hyperemotionality so strong in infancy that it shut down my emotions, and I can't feel them? But that makes no sense either, because I can feel simple pure emotions intensely, but almost none of the social emotions that NTs are constantly eggschanging with each other to have intuitive social cognition and lots of social behaviors. Or was it my ability to feel others' emotions shutdown after hyperemotional overload in infancy, and that was why I didn't interact to develop social cognition and was so aloof and uncommunicative in childhood?

I find eye contact painful and disturbing.

Anyway, I don't think the intense world explains every autistic person. It explains some, perhaps only partially. I found it helpful for admitting/accepting that I was autistic, but it doesn't really cover everything about me.

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27 Apr 2012, 2:51 am

Anyone looked at this?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Impulse_control_disorder

I say it again Aspartame, I saw someone with 8 bottles of the stuff in his boot. ?

foxfield
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27 Apr 2012, 4:10 am

fragileclover wrote:

Many years ago, after a co-worker suggested I might have Asperger's, I went online and read a very broad description of AS. It seemed to emphasize a lack of empathy and made it sound that those with AS were hyposensitive to emotions. I immediately dismissed that idea that I could have AS, on this alone, because if anything, I was HYPERsensitive and emotional.

Fast forward five years or so...I ended up doing a web search for 'hyperemotional' and 'hypersensitive' and ended up here on Wrong Planet, where I learned that many with AS might in fact be too empathetic and be hypersensitive to emotions. Once I read that, I decided to research further, and found everything else fit me

Yes yes yes me too! I had known about aspergers for a long long time but only recently realised I could have it, for precisely the reason you describe. I am extremely sensitive to emotions, I instantly pick up on the feelings of others in the room and videos such as the one you posted affect me deeply.

I think maybe only some aspies are like this though. I am not particularly sensitive to touch, smell or taste, only noise. I think the majority of aspies are hypersensitive, but maybe what we are hypersensitive to differs depending on the individual.

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27 Apr 2012, 4:18 am

fragileclover wrote:

My boyfriend showed me the following video last night, and I only made it halfway through before bursting into tears. I was literally sobbing, gasping for breath, with my head in my hands. It took several minutes for my boyfriend to console me. For the next hour or so, if I thought about the video, I started crying again.

{UP Video}

I cried the whole way through that film, in a cinema. I could feel my whole body jerking, as I tried to control it. Each time that music came on, the tears would start flowing uncontrollably again. Thankfully, the place was pretty empty, as it was the early morning kids' club.

I'd say I'm extremely empathic, highly emotional and I'm pretty certain I can sense the emotions of others (might not know exactly why they are feeling the way they do, but can be quite sure of what their emotional state is). It makes me feel uncomfortable and overwhelmed, especially if I think I may be the cause of any negative emotion. I consider myself to be a highly sensitive person and relate to that just as much as the description of women with Aspergers in 'Aspergirls'. BTW, I don't have any diagnosis.

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27 Apr 2012, 4:41 am

This has always been the way with me. "Up" wrecked me emotionally(I've cried to multiple Pixar films, come to think of it).

Hell, I've cried over sad dreams the night before.

When I first got my diagnosis, I had wondered how I had managed over the years to be the guy that everyone else confided in. The Intense World theory and over-empathizing has since explained that to me. I guess others saw how much I'd empathize with others and so deemed me the guy to confide in.

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27 Apr 2012, 4:47 am

Your Aspie score: 64 of 200.
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 128 of 200.
You are very likely neurotypical.

& I SUCK AT Extrovert.

NT

Perception 7
Hunting is 8.5
Talent is 9
Social is 6
Communication is 6.5
Compulsive is 3

Aspie

Perception 2.5
Hunting 2
Communication 2.7 ish
Social 3
Compulsive 2.7 ish
Talent 5

Since these ones are in the middle

Physical 5
Intellectual 8.8 ish

HairlessAlbinoCat
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27 Apr 2012, 7:02 am

bumble wrote:

Not diagnosed either but part of my problem is intensity of emotion, both in terms of feeling other peoples emotions and in regards to my own. I also have physical sensitivities as well which don't help either (certain materials, bright sunlight, noise in crowds etc although I am ok with loud music so I usually get around noise outside by wearing headphones when I go out and won't leave the house with my mp3 player lol).

For various reasons I find that socialising overwhelms me, so whether I have an ASD or not, sometimes I need to isolate and spend time alone so that I can relax and recharge my energies, otherwise I end up having a huge eppi which is shortly followed by almost complete burn out and a massive episode of depression due to exhaustion.

Quite frankly dealing with my emotions, others emotions, my other sensitivities, making social chit chat (which hurts my head more than taking an exam) and people's constant need for interaction...is complete wipe out for me, so I prefer not to socialise too often.

It's not that I don't care about people or their feelings, I care very much, I just cannot deal with it all.

This is what I struggle to make therapists understand and much of it is the basis of the social anxiety that I was diagnosed with (I am much less concerned with embarrassment as I think people judge on ridiculous criteria and the last time I did something embarrassing such as walking into a lamp post I found it funny rather than mortifying (hey it was a head on collision because I didn't even see it with perfect timing that made the people at the nearby bus stop burst into laughter lololololol snort).

Unfortunately therapy or medication does not work. Meds make my emotions even more intense and the therapist cannot understand that I find socialising tiring and that I can struggle with small talk and chit chat etc...they seem to think that if I just relax it will come to me naturally. Errr I am 36 and I still can't tell, for example, if a man is flirting with me even after reading body language books, asking people what to look for and trying out experiments to try and figure it out myself!

I get the theory but in practice....argghhhhhhhh

Yet if I say that to a therapist they start talking to me slowly as though I am stupid! Ok I don't get the social stuff much but academically I am a straight A student most of the time, so really there is no need to talk to me like a 5 year old with a below normal IQ. Academically I am probably smarter than the therapist talking down to me!

Many social interactions can be confusing for me in a number of ways and I have to spend so much time trying to figure stuff out it gives me a headache

Then I have deal with noise
Thinking of things to say
Deal with the bright lights
Drop my inner obsession with being more amused by my own thoughts than the conversation
Trying not to flee so that I can get back to my latest hobby
Trying to hear what people are actually saying amidst the noise
Then there is emotional stuff on top of all that.

It's complete overload is what it is!

I stay home a lot instead of socialising these days...

PS sorry for any bad grammar and punctuation tonight! I know there are errors in my post, I am just short on time at the moment.

I find my self very identified with this, I don't go out much either, actually I've been dreading this up coming weekend since apparently I have no way out my cousins wedding, I hope I found a way to stay out of the emotional, loud, bright NT driven crowd, it really is exhausting...

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27 Apr 2012, 7:18 am

Someone got empathy confused with sympathy. Most people make that mistake. In this case, it is probably a translation error, seeing that this article is based on Swiss research. If aspies had too much empathy, we'd be better at reading facial expressions and body language than neurotypical people. Is that true? No. Of course not. Aspies may feel a lot of sympathy for others, but that is not quite the same.

Sympathy is the ability to feel compassion for other people, whereas empathy is the ability to read nonverbal cues such as facial expression. If you're not particularly good at the latter, you lack empathy, even if you're a very sympathetic person who feels very strongly for others if their life situation is communicated to you via language or a movie plot. Conversely, there are narcissists who are very good at reading their fellow people, which means they're highly empathetic, but they don't feel a shred of sympathy for others.

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27 Apr 2012, 8:10 am

I'm able to pick up on the emotions of the people around me. If somebody in the room is happy sad or angry, I end up feeling the same way. There are times that I find it hard to be in a room filled with people, because I can feel all these emotions at once. If I pick up too much on the negative emotions that might be in the room, the floodgates can start to open, or else I'll start to feel really tense.

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27 Apr 2012, 8:46 am

CrazyCatLord wrote:

^^^
This
I must admit I sometimes use the word empathy when in fact I mean sympathy, specifically with the term "hyperempathic" - though I've seen this term been used in the context of sympathy, like the fictional character that's called an "Empath" which by the way seems less of a fictional character for a lot of us in WP. Unless one takes into consideration the X-men version of the "Empath". But I digressed.
What I meant is that I think, in some contexts the meanings may colloquially overlap, as in "hyperempathy" - I certainly haven't read of anyone describing them selves as "hypersympathetic" but by all means I do think I'll stick with it when describing this hypersympathy issues I for one deal with, as a lot of us.

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27 Apr 2012, 9:13 am

CrazyCatLord wrote:

You're correct on sympathy, but a little off in terms of empathy. Empathy has to do with feeling as others do, or as you imagine they might be feeling. While, yes, sometimes that has to do with facial expression, some aspies just sense what others are feeling, or they watch a video like the one I played and begin to feel themselves the way the character is feeling. In sympathy, you have compassion, but you don't necessarily feel what the other person is going through.

This is from a post I made several months back:

Quote:

Difference Between Empathy and Sympathy

Here are two perfect and easy to understand definitions from the site:

Empathy: The ability to co-experience and relate to the thoughts, emotions, or experience of another without them being communicated directly by the individual.

Sympathy: The ability to understand and to support the emotional situation or experience of another being with compassion and sensitivity.

The two are actually quite different, if you think about it. Empathy is almost a psychic experience; at the very least, intuition. When I'm in a room with other people, I take on the moods of those people. I can feel what they feel. That's why I don't remain angry for long after getting into a fight with someone, because as soon as the other person has distanced themselves from me, the feeling of anger dissipates and I feel happy, as if nothing happened.

Sympathy is not at all about feeling what another person is feeling, but understanding what another person is going through, and wanting to do something to help them or make the hurting stop for that person.

The way I see it, I think it's more than likely that Aspies have plenty of Empathy, but little to no Sympathy. That's the case with me, at least. If I'm the room with someone who feels sad, I will feel sad...but I don't know how to make that person feel better, and don't really care...I just want them to feel better so that I can stop feeling the same way.

They can also be simplified this way: Empathy results from an UNSPOKEN sense of what another person is feeling. Sympathy requires a verbalization on part of the other person as to what they are feeling, and then an attempt on your part to understand it, and a resulting desire to help the person. If someone is not saying anything, I will pick up on their emotion and feel it myself. If someone TELLS me what they are feeling, I don't identify with it.

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AQ: 34/50 (Aspie range)
EQ: 32 / SQ: 68 (Extreme Systemizing / AS or HFA)
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27 Apr 2012, 9:55 am

CrazyCatLord wrote:

Empathy is two things:

One is cognitive empathy, which is what you're talking about. This is impaired in the autism spectrum.

The other is affective empathy, which is the ability to sense/perceive another's emotional state. This is typically (but not always) about the same in autistic people as it is in NTs. It sounds like you're getting some of sympathy mixed up with affective empathy.

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27 Apr 2012, 10:15 am

I think someone been smoking something, wrong.....

I score 115 on impulse control test. Yet by this it says I should be off the charts. Only problem is, I am a shy introvert.

Quote:

Strong impulse control or will power protects against ADHD, CD, ODD, addiction and antisocial personality disorder. These are all genetic disorders caused in part by poor impulse control.

What Is Impulse Control?

Impulse Control means controlling our reactions to the impulses that come from our basic drives and emotions. Impulse control is about choosing instead of reacting. A person with a lot of impulse control or will power can resist his drives and control his actions. Impulse control leads to popularity, economic success and life success! Impulse control is a talent that often determines a person's social status.

Sound like RDOS test?

http://parentingtheatriskchild.com/impu ... ntrol.html

Last edited by TechnoDog on 27 Apr 2012, 10:15 am, edited 1 time in total.

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Just read the study from 2009: Aspies have TOO MUCH Empathy