Some sentence structure drives be nuts.

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There's a comma in that sentence, especially if it's spoken aloud. "If you can, come in early" is much easier to parse.

Well, just Sunday I thought, "Talking is such an inefficient communication tool"...

I'm sort of curious if any aspie can read Ulysses.

That's what's called 'stream of consciousness' writing, which I never understood. I am writing stream of consciousness, right now, apart from a few syntax and grammar corrections. Is Ulysses, then, how most people think? I understand that most people need notes to read it, because of all the cultural artifacts from 1920s Ireland, but its supposed to be comprehensible other than that. To me its utter gibberish, and I've tried to read it with the notes.

Mulveys was the first when I was in bed that morning

Mrs Rubio brought it in with the coffee she stood there standing when I asked her to hand me and I pointing at them I couldnt think of the word a hairpin to open it with ah horquilla

disobliging old thing and it staring her in the face with her switch of false hair on her and vain about her appearance ugly as she was near 80 or a 100

Try reading James Joyce's Ulysses.

How the heck anyone can read this sort of stuff:

Mulveys was the first when I was in bed that morning and Mrs Rubio brought it in with the coffee she stood there standing when I asked her to hand me and I pointing at them I couldnt think of the word a hairpin to open it with ah horquilla disobliging old thing and it staring her in the face with her switch of false hair on her and vain about her appearance ugly as she was near 80 or a 100 her face a mass of wrinkles with all her religion domineering because she never could get over the Atlantic fleet coming in half the ships of the world and the Union Jack flying with all her carabineros because 4 drunken English sailors took all the rock from them and because I didnt run into mass often enough in Santa Maria to please her with her shawl up on her except when there was a marriage on with all her miracles of the saints and her black blessed virgin with the silver dress and the sun dancing 3 times on Easter Sunday morning and when the priest was going by with the bell bringing the vatican to the dying blessing herself for his Majestad an admirer he signed it I near jumped out of my skin I wanted to pick him up when I saw him following me along the Calle Real in the shop window then he tipped me just in passing I never thought hed write making an appointment I had it inside my petticoat bodice all day reading it up in every hole and corner while father was up at the drill instructing to find out by the handwriting or the language of stamps singing I remember shall I wear a white rose and I wanted to put on the old stupid clock to near the time

But they do! "Anyone can read it" they say. Huh???!??!?

Well, that was rough, but I think I have a translation for you:

Mulveys was in bed in the morning. Mrs. Rubio then came in, and Mulveys thought that she looked like a hag, followed by other, more incomprehensible thoughts. Mulveys had these thoughts because he's insane.

Well, that was rough, but I think I have a translation for you:

Mulveys was in bed in the morning. Mrs. Rubio then came in, and Mulveys thought that she looked like a hag, followed by other, more incomprehensible thoughts. Mulveys had these thoughts because he's insane.

Oh yeah it's better that way.


Right, so what do we do instead ?

Try reading James Joyce's Ulysses.

How the heck anyone can read this sort of stuff:

Mulveys was the first when I was in bed that morning and Mrs Rubio brought it in with the coffee she stood there standing when I asked her to hand me and I pointing at them I couldnt think of the word a hairpin to open it with ah horquilla disobliging old thing and it staring her in the face with her switch of false hair on her and vain about her appearance ugly as she was near 80 or a 100 her face a mass of wrinkles with all her religion domineering because she never could get over the Atlantic fleet coming in half the ships of the world and the Union Jack flying with all her carabineros because 4 drunken English sailors took all the rock from them and because I didnt run into mass often enough in Santa Maria to please her with her shawl up on her except when there was a marriage on with all her miracles of the saints and her black blessed virgin with the silver dress and the sun dancing 3 times on Easter Sunday morning and when the priest was going by with the bell bringing the vatican to the dying blessing herself for his Majestad an admirer he signed it I near jumped out of my skin I wanted to pick him up when I saw him following me along the Calle Real in the shop window then he tipped me just in passing I never thought hed write making an appointment I had it inside my petticoat bodice all day reading it up in every hole and corner while father was up at the drill instructing to find out by the handwriting or the language of stamps singing I remember shall I wear a white rose and I wanted to put on the old stupid clock to near the time

But they do! "Anyone can read it" they say. Huh???!??!?

At first glance much of the book may appear unstructured and chaotic; Joyce once said that he had "put in so many enigmas and puzzles that it will keep the professors busy for centuries arguing over what I meant," which would earn the novel "immortality".[12]

from Wiki article

Well let's see:

MulveyswasthefirstwhenIwasinbedthatmorningandMrsR
ubiobroughtitinwiththecoffeeshestoodtherestanding
whenIaskedhertohandmeandIpointingatthemIcouldntth
inkofthewordahairpintoopenitwithahhorquilladisobl
igingoldthinganditstaringherinthefacewithherswitc
hoffalsehaironherandvainaboutherappearanceuglyass
hewasnear80ora100herfaceamassofwrinkleswithallher
religiondomineeringbecauseshenevercouldgetoverthe
Atlanticfleetcominginhalftheshipsoftheworldandthe
UnionJackflyingwithallhercarabinerosbecause4drunk
enEnglishsailorstookalltherockfromthemandbecauseI
didntrunintomassoftenenoughinSantaMariatopleasehe
rwithhershawluponherexceptwhentherewasamarriageon
withallhermiraclesofthesaintsandherblackblessedvi
rginwiththesilverdressandthesundancing3timesonEas
terSundaymorningandwhenthepriestwasgoingbywiththe
bellbringingthevaticantothedyingblessingherselffo
rhisMajestadanadmirerhesigneditInearjumpedoutofmy
skinIwantedtopickhimupwhenIsawhimfollowingmealong
theCalleRealintheshopwindowthenhetippedmejustinpa
ssingIneverthoughthedwritemakinganappointmentIhad
itinsidemypetticoatbodicealldayreadingitupinevery
holeandcornerwhilefatherwasupatthedrillinstructin
gtofindoutbythehandwritingorthelanguageofstampssi
ngingIremembershallIwearawhiteroseandIwantedtoput
ontheoldstupidclocktonearthetime


Yes, a little more challenging than the original text. I have arbitrarily used a line length of 50 characters (otherwise it would be one line that does not word-wrap). I have great trouble understanding both. Still if someone could rewrite using sentences, the might be a story in there somewhere.