NT's - Why do you come to this site?

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The problem with us adults is that many of us haven't learned to compensate enough to really get by in society and we still go through hell. Many of us can't hold down a job and there really are no services for adults. What happens is we are priced out of a diagnosis. I know this happens to young people too but it's especially a problem for adults. I'm glad kids today have access to in school programs and testing because it would have benefited me a lot as a child. The only IEP they had when I was in k-12 was send you to the 'bad kids' school. But anyway.... yeah, I don't believe in excluding anyone from WP either unless they're here to be as*holes.

I am waiting on an official assessment but I like your post.

To the OP at the moment I may be self diagnosed but I am not an Aspie wantabe living with this has been pure Hell.

I am not going to attack the OP I guess his life must have been Hell and maybe he is venting off steam I know how it feels.

OP you have got it wrong but we forgive you.

Thanks for saying that. We do need the NT perspective; diversity is a good thing. And you're right--who would want to be called an Aspie, unless they already were one? Being an Aspie is foreign to someone who's NT; it's not who they are and they wouldn't want to be known as one. Whereas, if you're Aspie but undiagnosed because your parents, doctors, or society had no clue, then wouldn't it be part of affirming your identity to say, "Hey, yeah, I'm different"?

I'm officially diagnosed several times over (because every doctor has a different opinion of where I am on the spectrum, drat them and their hair-splitting). And yet I can still understand why someone might be self-diagnosed. Maybe they can't get a doctor to listen to them, or can't pay for a doctor. Maybe their insurance will go up, their job will discriminate against them, or their school will marginalize them if they're known to have a disability. Maybe in their country there simply isn't enough access to medical care, or enough knowledge of autism. Maybe they are worried about discrimination to the point that they have to stay "in the closet" and do their best on their own. There are many, many reasons. Even in cases of fraud, autism is not the sort of disorder that lends itself easily to a con man. With its life-long nature, autism is just not something you can fake very easily. Fakers tend to go for chronic injuries and illnesses with subtle symptoms--psychological disorders (including neurological ones like autism) are at the bottom of the list because of their low social status. There's just no reason to choose autism when there are so many more attractive options for fraud out there.

Is there a danger that you might mis-diagnose yourself? Yes, certainly. Even professional doctors make mistakes. Usually, when somebody does that, what they have is a related disorder--maybe social anxiety disorder, depression, avoidant personality, or ADHD. It's certainly not ideal; but what do you expect of those people? Unable to access medical care for some reason, they have to do their best. At the worst, they'll share some traits with people on the spectrum, and perhaps learn some things that can help them, too. Autism doesn't exist in a vacuum; it's related to lots of other different disorders, and the ones that are most closely related are the ones most likely to be mistaken for autism. If you had to make a mistake like that, at least you're most likely to make it in a way that can still afford you some help.

Bottom line being--self-diagnosed and NT people are an integral part of Wrong Planet. If we get elitist, we'll lose most of the usefulness that we have as a community to people who come to visit and exchange ideas. Heck, if WP got elitist enough, I'd probably just leave. That kind of thing makes me literally sick to my stomach, and if I can't talk people out of it, I tend to avoid it, because I prefer not to see my breakfast a second time.

I didn't mean to imply that many adults still don't go through hell daily, so my apologies for any misunderstanding. I certainly still have my days (which can seem like weeks). Honestly, I don't know what I'd do if I lost my current job (account analyst), which is a very routine-oriented job.

What did the OP do? I think you mean PTSmorrow?

No I am responding to a post I agree with which I know is not the OP.

The OP is fed up with self diagnosed and NT people on the site.

So I guess I am responding to two people but only quoting one.

This is what I love about people with Aspergers we can ask people to clarify posts without meaning or taking insult.

On a NT forum a misunderstanding like this would have the insults flying.

Thanks for that. I was thinking the same thing but didn't want to risk being yelled at. Prejudice goes both ways and I always find it hard to understand why the people who are complaining NT's don't bother to understand them are the same ones who are always bashing us and pushing us further away even when some of us (especially those of us on this site) are trying.

Sometimes people still get offended, especially the ones on the spectrum, when I ask. They go like "can't you read?" "Did I say that?" You can't win.

I like being yelled at, it gives me a reason to yell

Having Aspergers myself I find anything social a big effort.

People who get offended easily are simply not worth the effort .

Some people go out of their way to be offended.

I thought the OP was asking NTs why they come here, what are their reasons for doing so?
This thread has de-railed IMHO.
It is MOST unfortunate that there are those on the Spectrum who do seem to want to be the members of some "Elite" group. Whatever..
However, unless some one is being hugely rude, trolling, or picking fights, bullying, etc. I see no problem with WP being open to everyone who wants to be here..
BTW, there are also forums here that are not so public that can be used.

Sincerely,
Matthew

That is exactly whyt this topic was started. I did not mean to upset anyone. I am not on this site to cause any trouble. I am here to learn as much as I can about AS and support my husband.

WW

I think most of the NT's that come here are as someone else said family members and friends to people on the spectrum and they come here for better understanding and some are people who have only a few autistic traits and they come here hoping to better understand themselves.

Last edited by Washi on 30 Jun 2012, 7:46 pm, edited 1 time in total.

You didn't cause trouble, people get upset here all the time. Don't let it scare you off!

I think we just fed the troll a little too much. I almost went off too but restrained myself. Not your fault.

Same as you. To better understsand my partner, to understand the signs and symptoms so that I may better understand and relate with the man I love.