Beliefs about autism/asperger's

Post Reply New Topic

I understand what it's like to feel weak, powerless and unable to act upon one's desires. While other teenagers are out there having the time of their lives, I spend much of my time pacing around my room endlessly, crying and brooding because I'm too nervous to ask anyone (even my friends) to hang out with me.

In spite of the fact that I have been bullied and excluded all my life, that I'm socially anxious, that I suffer from depression as an indirect result of AS or that most of my extended family only see some weird ret*d kid who must be avoided at all cost, if a cure was discovered and became mandatory, I honestly would take a knife to my throat if there was no other way to escape it. AS is a part of me and to remove it would be to remove my soul and replace it with another. To remove my AS would effectively be to kill me and I don't give a damn what the rest of the world thinks, I like me!

Obviously, you are 50 and I am only 14. Maybe if I were your age, I would view things differently but why anyone would want to disappear forever and have some brand new neurotypical person with the same name and body replace them is beyond my comprehension. This is not an attack on your beliefs, I'm merely stating what I believe.

I'm sorry, but I honestly don't know the exact reason. I come from an abusive family who only had me professionally diagnosed so that they could use the bus for free. From a young age I've always displayed many symptoms of AS such as obsessive interests, being oblivious to non verbal social ques, being quick tempered and having an (unfulfilled) need for structure and routine. I now live in a children's home and neither my social workers or my learning support teacher will give me access to any documents concerning my diagnosis. When I was young, I tried to ask mother what AS was and her response was "sigh... LOOK- IT BASICALLY MEANS ANNOYING M*NG* FREAK DISEASE. NOW FOR THE MILLIONTH TIME, LEAVE ME ALONE!"

As you can see, I haven't really received the best information about autism.

I think AS is a disablity. But most people think of a disablity as a pyshical or mental emparment. AS is different, its soical emparment. Because of this, people with AS slip through the cracks.

You sure about that? I'm hypo and hyper sensitive to most things. They are extremely disabling - especially when having to plan my life around these things.



I don't have the same difficulties as those with AS and my speech is still affected.