Do you ever tell people you're autistic?

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Teredia
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12 Aug 2012, 7:27 am

I will hide it until i must tell them or one of my friends opens their mouths n tells someone i have it!! Which happens a lot because the person doesnt understand why i am acting the way i am or doing what i am doing.
I usually tell people who become close or good friends to me, that I am, that i have Aspergers and hope they know/understand what it is.



Tequila
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12 Aug 2012, 7:35 am

No, I don't. Frankly, I have more than enough problems as-is.



Wandering_Stranger
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12 Aug 2012, 7:38 am

Mirror21 wrote:
Usually hide it because A. its usually a problem when the person does not believe me and B I do not mention it until it is relevant.


Same. I once told someone who decided it can't be that bad because I'd just been diagnosed, (apparently, traits in females are different and we hide them more?) and then decided that she knew more than me. I don't present with the typical traits that many do.

As a result, I was sent a text where that person had booked an appointment for me for the next day. Not much of a warning. :x

I have told people before and got much more positive and less judgemental responses.



howzat
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12 Aug 2012, 9:23 am

The only people i tell is my mother close relatives and people who i know well enough but no one else.



alecazam3567
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12 Aug 2012, 10:38 am

I don't mention it unless it's going to help explain my behavior. Like, if I meet someone, I don't shake their hand and go, "Hi, I have Asperger's." But I also don't usually hide it. I have told my mom and my closest friends. Only now do I realize how ignorant some of my friends can be...

Anyway, I just use it to explain some of my behavior to them. I wouldn't use it as an icebreaker though :P



Heidi80
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12 Aug 2012, 10:47 am

I'm out all the way. My friends at uni know, my family knows, the social services know etc



Colinn
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12 Aug 2012, 10:54 am

I don't usually no, unless I feel its relevant to disclose. Only some close friends and family know that I am diagnosed. Most people don't really understand what it is, so it feels pointless to disclaim it to everyone I am friendly with.



Tuttle
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12 Aug 2012, 11:13 am

I'm open about it and find this works well for me.



The_Walrus
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12 Aug 2012, 11:32 am

I "came out" to my friends on Facebook for a few reasons.

1) I was being asked a lot of questions about it
2) I was fed up of speculation as to what was "wrong" with me
3) I thought it explained large parts of my personality- my hatred of parties, for example- so it was important my friends knew about it

Before then I only mentioned it if it explicitly came up in conversation. Someone was talking rubbish about autistic people not following rules and similar, I called them out on it and they said "how would you know, I have an autistic cousin so I think I know a thing or two about this!".

However, I didn't mention it when my Biology class were discussing Wakefield's discredited research and my teacher said "you all probably know someone with autism". I think that might have been an invitation for me to say "yes, everyone here does, because I have it".
That was a much better than one of my primary school teachers who listed the symptoms of autism then made a point of asking me "how do you pronounce Asperger's?" (actually, she said "how do you pronounce "hamburger's syndrome""). My classmates realised from that that I must have it. I challenged her on this at the end of the day, and she said "I didn't say "The Walrus has Asperger's", if they leapt to that conclusion then it isn't my fault". She was a crap teacher.



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12 Aug 2012, 12:12 pm

I'm pretty open about telling people



birchbark
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12 Aug 2012, 1:08 pm

I told my mom when I first learned about AS (I never sought a formal diagnosis). I don't think she was convinced and now I always think she's analyzing my behavior. Luckily it hasn't hurt our relationship, just made me a little paranoid. Still, that reaction has definitely deterred me from mentioning it to anyone else. Maybe it would be different if I had a formal diagnosis, but I'm not sure. Like many others have said, my traits are fairly mild so they would probably either write it off or start watching my every move. Still, it would be nice to have people understand me a little better...



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12 Aug 2012, 1:23 pm

My other paranoia is people thinking I am using it as an excuse if I tell them.


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Quinntilda
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12 Aug 2012, 1:25 pm

No I dont tell people about it because it ruined me. Its not really worth telling people about negative things in life.



Ann2011
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12 Aug 2012, 1:27 pm

dyingofpoetry wrote:
I'd prefer that people know I'm on the spectrum than to just let them think I am weird, rude, incompetent, or socialpathic!


This ^^

I prefer people to know why I act the way I do.

Sometimes, when I've disclosed, people just say nothing, or sometimes something silly like, "no you don't." But over the long run I notice that they are more accepting of my behaviour.



Einfari
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12 Aug 2012, 1:38 pm

I never tell anyone that I'm autistic. My family and some of their friends are the only people that know. Even the friends that I've known for years don't know that I'm autistic. I', always afraid that people will judge me differently if I tell them. My mom also told me when I was a kid to avoid telling others that I'm autistic.



Fiz
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12 Aug 2012, 1:55 pm

I tell people but not straight away. It's usually about 6 months to a year minimum before people find out I am autistic because I want people to get to know me first for a bit without categorizing me. This seems to work quite well for me, but I also don't just bring it up. I wait until someone notices any 'quirks' in my personality and then I'll mention it or makes any other comment that makes bringing up autism relevant.


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