The mirror at the hairdresser... and the hairdresser...

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I can completely relate to this. I used to get my hair cut at a barber, and I would find it rather awkward to look into while having him look into the mirror as well. I never really knew what sort of expression I should be making, so I played it safe with the blank look. One type of conversation I really hate is small talk, so getting primarily small talk while I sit there forced to look into that mirror is not a good combination. It annoyed me that much I started getting it cut at home which works much better for me.

Most definitely, though my hair is shoulder length so I've only gone maybe twice in the last year, thankfully. I especially hate it when I'm looking at their facial expressions and reactions in the mirror while they talk, only to have them look up and make eye contact with me. Because I'm pretty quiet, I tend to ask them questions to keep them too busy to focus on my responses which leads to long monologues in which case I realized I have a terrible time trying to sound interested (even though I do) and end up saying 'uh-huh,' 'right' and 'I see' far too many times and in awkward places.

I hate getting my hair cut and getting a hair cut. I just cut my own hair now at home. I don't need to go somewhere where I'll feel uncomfortable and I can cut it exactly how I like. I've always had problems when I had someone else do it and I hate them trying to talk to me.

Hairdressers tend to like to talk, ask them a question that will keep them going for ages. E.g. "what determines how fast hair grows?" "What is the structural difference between curly and straight hair?" etc. However looking at those, I am thinking that only someone with ASD would ask a hairdresser to monologue about hair structure.

But yeah, I'm another one now getting home haircuts. Much better.

I'm used to my barber so I don't mind chatting with him while he cuts my hair. It's good to remember that the barber is probably trying to impress you and make you want to return, so you're calling the shots. It's not like a party where you might feel you're the one who is being judged. Sure, he'll have his private opinion of you, but he'll never be allowed to air it. You are his boss. It doesn't much matter what you say, as long as you don't go really wacky......he will just crank out unqualified approval, because the customer is always right.

Last time I went, I discovered that I could make eye contact via the mirror. That was rather fun. He was clearly quite used to doing that. I usually just hold my head forward unless he asks me to turn it so he can get to the different parts of my head. I have a very simple style so it only takes 5 or 10 minutes. I'm afraid if you want something more fussy, you're going to have to learn to cope with the irritation of these grooming servants for a lot longer.

We have a hairdresser that comes to our house, which is much better.

I've found a nice traditional Turkish barber who doesn't speak much English and is intently focused on the cut. Zero small talk.

Jason.

I dont have much problems with the small talk as I have been going to my hairdresser for so long she knows I dont talk much so she chats with the other hairdressers.

One of the most uncomfortable experiences for me is to see myself in a mirror, when I'm talking. So, to be looking so dreadful (hair soaking wet, with a black polyester cape around my shoulders), looking at myself and while someone else (who has spent a lot of time looking good) is looking at me, as we speak, is just awful. I hate everything about going to a hairdressers, but the mirror is the worst part. I've cut my own hair on the last few occasions and only envisage going back if my style starts to look weird and it's still too short to put in a bun.

I'm very lucky in that respect. I don't much like my appearance when I see it in a mirror, but my gut reaction to the sight of anybody who is all primped up is even more derogatory, so I hardly ever feel visually inferior. Though perhaps that's because I'm male and don't have quite so much of this "I hate my body" thing going on as most of the ladies seem to have. If I had that, I'd want to rip it out of myself.

I don't hate my body and I don't think they actually look superior to me (some of the dolled up ladies look ridiculous, especially if they're wearing loads of fake tan). But when I'm looking at my worst and they've made an effort, the comparison in the mirror is startling. I know I'm going to go out looking fine, but the image in the mirror is awful.

Maybe "body-hating" is too strong a phrase for it, but I would think there has to be something irrational and insecure going on about your appearance, if the mere sight of yourself with wet hair, alongside the hairdresser, can keep you out of the place.

No, there's much more than the sight of myself keeping me out of the place. I hate the noise of the hairdryers, the heat of the hairdryer, close to burning my ears off, feeling like I'm choking, with my head tilted backwards into the basin, the sprays, the chitchat with people who really don't care what you are doing this weekend, but asking anyway, the fear of the hairdresser who just loves really curly hair and decides to embark on creating a huge Afro, or the one who has a fear of hair with anything more than a wave in it, going in and finding that your hairdresser has only started on the client before you, so you're going to have to be in there even longer than you thought you might...

The OP's question was about mirrors in hairdressers and, as I said in my first post, I detest seeing myself talking in a mirror. I have a slight phobia of mirrors - not my image (I'm happy with the way I look, but not with wet hair and a black polyester cape on). My phobia is a kind of nightmarish thing, where I think I might see something else there, instead of what I'm expecting. Of course, it's never happened, but I'm just not a lover of mirrors. Also, I can be completely disorientated and unco-ordinated when I'm trying to perform a task while looking in one. How I look just adds to this discomfort.

Just the icing on the cake to an already traumatic and uncomfortable experience, OK that figures.

I watch their hands in the mirror and ask questions about how they are cutting it. Not to second guess them, just to find out how it works.

I have no problem with the Mirror. I have to takeoff my glasses so they can cut my hair. My eyesight is so bad without them Everything is blurry. lol. Makes it easy to ignore the mirror.