Curious Teacher wants to know...

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I'm almost disgusted to death with this ridiculous idea that NT people have that someone can't POSSIBLY have Asperger's because they don't have all the traits or have some non-aspie traits. When I was a child I was very good at reading and writing for my age and could recognize non-verbal cues. In fact it was almost like I didn't have Asperger's in my early school years because I had friends, was usually outgoing and an extrovert, and math was about the only subject I found extremely difficult. But I also preferred playing alone than with other kids and got along with the younger ones better than kids my own age, and I had odd and scary fears and behaviors that people dismissed as part of my being an "artist" (I loved to draw cartoons and was really good at it for my age). But I'm female, and girls with Asperger's often get misdiagnosed or not at all because they don't usually act as "extreme" for some reason. Things got really hard when I became a teenager and your entire life is supposed to revolve around your physical appearance and being social and fitting in and you no longer acknowledge your once-idolized parents' presence if you can help it unless you need money or the car or whatever, I wouldn't know.

Anyway, I wasn't diagnosed with AD until I was in my mid-20's and my life was on the verge of being over, or worse. If I had been diagnosed with it when I was still a kid (I was out of school by 1994 when they finally recognized it as a disorder), my life may have gone differently and probably much better, although things are a lot better for me today.

This may vary from state to state, but in Missouri where I live when they (the school) do an observation and an assesment they are doing that to determine whether the child has "educational autism". Now educational autism is a thing all by itself. It is not AS, it is not Kanner's, it is not PPD-NOS, etc.

Last time I asked the local autism advocate in town there were 250 kids who have a professional diagnosis of autism (somewhere on the spectrum.) However, when observed and diagnosed by the school for 'educational autism', the school only diagnosed and acknowledged 98 of them as having educational autism. The advocate says this is pretty much the main issue of trying to get proper services to the kids. Their doctors say they have autism, but the school doesn't acknowledge it. The educational autism has stricter criteria.

My son is one of the 152 kids whose doctor diagnoses them somewhere on the spectrum, but the school says no. We are fortunate that his school does provide him the services he needs with a "medical-other" diagnosis, which does include working with the autism programs. Some parents at other schools have not been so lucky and they turn to advocates, lawyers and lawsuits to fight for their kids needs.

The school's do not always have the same definition of autism. Their criteria may be a little more strict.

OK. So let's never mind the fact that "thumbs up and thumbs down" is not even "body language." For crying out loud. And it's not the kind of "nonverbal communication" that autistics have trouble with.

Stuff like this makes me want to shake people. (Not you, OP, but the person who did the evaluation).

The symptoms that you indicated greatly overwhelm the fact that he has decent eye contact. There is no diagnostic criteria anywhere that indicates that all people on the spectrum have poor eye contact.

I suspect your hunch is right. Even if you can't convince anyone to give him formal help, there are things that you can do, so don't give up hope. You are an awesome teacher for recognizing this and he is lucky to have you. My son has always been maintained in a mainstream setting (private school because the public schools where we lived were dangerous and sucked up until mid-way through last year), even when his issues were more severe and it was all because he had dedicated teachers who helped make it work.

Good luck to you. If you are unable to get help, I am sure you can ask questions here or on the parents' board and people will be willing to give you guidance.

Yeah, it's actually people like ME who get thrown under the bus by these "experts" who know less about Asperger's/autism than most of this board. I think education on non-verbal cues and social norms should be available to EVERYONE, not just those who haven't a clue on anything social. I could use a few more of these skills myself for, say, when I have to go to a job interview.

Thank you to everyone who answered!

I will try to get a second opinion. I am working to document his behaviors carefully.

One of the issues is that while I have approached the parents (and the previous teacher did, too) with concerns that I have, the parents feel like he is just "socially awkward" and immature, and that these things are something he will grow out of. This is why I asked for a SEN coordinator to observe him, because while I can't say to the parents, "I think your child has Aspergers," she actually could say to them, "I observed him and noticed X, Y, and Z and recommend A, B, and C assessments to get a better picture of what is going on and how to help him cope better in school."

Any tips in the meantime? I will definitely be lurking on the parents board.

Thanks again!

Glad we could be of help! As tips for in the meantime, I am not sure other than observe in which environments he is most comfortable to do his work and do not let bad behavior slide, autism or not it is not an excuse for bad behavior.

It's the weirdest thing how we are supposed to have rigid black & white thinking yet most of the NT's I've talked to think that if you are not a clone of rainman you can't possibly be on the autism spectrum. I doubt most people even know what spectrum means. Unfortunately AS is pretty serious and early intervention makes a difference. I think the best policy, when trying to determine whether a child needs further evaluation, is to enlist the help of an observer who knows wtf he is talking about.