Living with other people.

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I live with my mother and luckily for me we manage to get along and not bother each other too much.

When she is gone I don't know what will happen. I won't be able to live with anyone else. I wouldn't be able to stand them and they wouldn't be able to stand me. What if they mess with my stuff? What if they have company over (especially overnight male company but any guests would be awkward)? What if they try to tell me what to do or don't like how little I clean? What if they expect me to be more social and not stay home sitting on the computer all the time?

Living with someone would make me be constantly stressed. I also don't know how anyone can stand to move in with a roommate that is a stranger. If my mother was gone I don't have any friends or relatives that would take me in and if any relatives did they would expect me to work and get out asap.

I know what you're talking about, it can be very distressing at times. At the moment I live in a student dorm and share a floor & kitchen with three other people. Fortunately, two of them are rather withdrawn and seldom leave their rooms, but there's one girl - actually very friendly, considerate and likeable - who just drives me crazy sometimes. She seems to be in the kitchen the entire evening. Whenever I want to eat something, she's there as well. And then she wants to talk to me - in very quick, mumbled English which isn't my first language, so I constantly have to ask her to repeat herself - about mindless smalltalk. I mean, I like her, but I just don't want to talk while I'm cooking. And she always asks me about what I'm going to cook and how it works and I just think "I'm throwing stuff into a pan randomly, does it look like I know what I'm doing?" Also, she's often talking on the phone, literally screaming into it, for hours, and I just can't stop wondering why anybody would want to do that.

Also, somebody here is very talented at slamming doors. Haven't found out who it is yet. And my neighbor is a heavy smoker and smokes in his room - which is actually strictly forbidden - and then the smoke comes into my room as well and I feel like living in a pub all day. Sometimes I just want to run away and hide in a cave somewhere.

This must have affected my dreams last night, as I dreamt that most of the population had departed and that there were very few people left (say in the US, a handful per state). Somehow, power, internet, etc. were still active.

Ugh I have been in that living situation before, only in my case it was 4 adults, 1 teenager and 2 toddlers. I was angry and stressed out all the time, and coped by shutting myself away in my bedroom even more than I already do under normal circumstances. I never want to live like that again.

I live with my parents and my older brother. It's ok. I dislike when they use a vacuum cleaner or when they make noise, but after all it's not so bad, exept the fact I argue with them a lot, not because they don't understand me but just because my personality is like that.
I don't know what I will do when they'll die, but ahw well, I will think about something when they'll be gone.

Oh for Christ sake why is ''live alone'', ''move out'', etc, always the answer all the time?! Not everyone can afford to move out, and not everyone wants to move out, even though living with people annoy them. I hate living with my family, but I would hate to live on my own too. If I got my own way, I would just like to live just with my mum and no-one else. Having just one person living with me, who I can feel close to and is easy to co-operate with, is all I need.

I have the same problem as you, Verdandi. I live with 3 other people and a very miaw-y cat, and it sometimes drives me mad. I have a weird brother who acts like a 7-year-old and gets away with it. If I ask him politely to keep the living-room door closed when he is in there with other people, he gets straight up and opens it, just to be awkward. Then his excuse to that is, ''you're just stupid!'' Why should I have to get out, just because my brother is immature? If my brother didn't live there, I think things would be a lot easier for both me and my parents.

Living with my parents doesn't mean I am not independent. I still do things for myself, like keeping my room clean, change my sheets regularly, prepare/cook my own meals, sort out things for myself, and go out and do what I want (like meet friends, etc), and I do give my parents some housekeep money from what I earn. The thought of moving out at the moment just makes me panic, all the upheaval of it and the big change, and then I'm afraid I might move somewhere where there's noisy neighbours (which will be worse than living with an immature brother), and also I would have to work full time in order to be able to live there, and I don't think I would be able to stick working full time at the place where I work part time now, but I don't think I would be able to find another job in today's economy.

I just have to put up with the usual cliche criticisms; ''your parents won't be around forever'', ''you have to think of the future'', ''where would you live when your parents die?'', and so on. I will cross that bridge when I come to it, OK? Who knows, in 4 or 5 years I might change my mind and feel more confident and happy to move out. But not at the moment, thanks.

I get exasperated with people at home. I only live with 3 people (please read my earlier post before you even think about writing ''move out''), but my mum's sisters and brother are so close to her that they are always round. One of her sisters is OK because she prefers routine and so I know exactly when she is going to come and when she's going to go. She is also quiet and quite easy to sit with. My mum's other sister is very disorganised, and she is the life and soul of the family and so everything goes her way. She also doesn't settle, she'd keep getting up to go out to smoke, leaving doors open and slamming doors shut. Thankfully she doesn't live local so we only see her at week-ends, but she wants to move nearer soon (because she has split up from her boyfriend), so I suppose life will never be the same again (as much as I love her, don't get me wrong). And my uncle is the most disorganised man I have ever known. He doesn't have any routine at all, plus he's got 2 teenage boys, and they all seem like lost souls. They usually come round mine at such random times, and could sometimes stay half way into the night, just when I want to go to bed (if I've got to get up early for work the next morning). Nobody takes that into consideration, they just come out of the living-room at 11.30pm or something, chattering loudly, leaving all the doors open so I can hear the TV murmuring on, and it disturbs me. And I'm not even going to go into how noisy my brother is. My brother is generally a quiet person who likes solitude, but when it comes to me liking solitude, he deliberately makes a noise by leaving doors open and lingering about outside my room, shuffling and talking to someone, then wonders why I get angry and he acts like a crybaby when I react, and everybody's on his side. I don't agree to that at all.

Also what gets me about people is, I can never go into the kitchen to get something to eat without somebody coming out of the living-room to see what the noise in the kitchen is. They're always like ''I thought it was somebody coming in.'' I don't know why, but having somebody opening a door a little to peep their head out just to see whether it's me or not REALLY ticks me off for some reason, and I can't settle until I have harshly reacted. I don't know why, it's just one of my pet peeves.

Oh, and you have learnt something else in my post too, that all NTs are different; some are disorganised whilst others are very organised. All of my mum's family are NTs but all seem to be the opposite extremes with organisation habits.

I know what you mean. I've lived in many different kinds of shared accommodation when I moved out - people who spoke a different language, extroverted people who love to party, and also very nice people. My family is hard to live with as well. Right now I wouldn't trade living alone with my bf for the world. But the downside is that I am barely getting by.

What surprises me is how oblivious they seem to be about your needs. I would think that someone's family would be more understanding than most people.

Before long, I will FINALLY have my own place, all to myself. It'll be absolute heaven, nobody bossing me around, yelling at me over every little thing, telling me how to live my life, etc. etc.