'Did I always do that??'

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ha! I was complete opposite. Cameras fascinated me so whenever a camera was brought out I would be in close proximity to it at all times.

Yep. Rocking, toe walking and hand flapping.

I've rocked for as long as I can remember, but wasn't aware of doing it as a small child. My mother told me I've always done it. Many times I'm not even aware that I'm doing it.

When I first discovered Asperger's, I read that AS children walk on their toes. I asked my mother if I did that as a child, and she said yes. She just thought it was something all little kids did. Since I am/was her oldest, she didn't have anything to compare me to. Within days of this conversation, two different people who were not connected to each other nor privy to the previous conversation told me I walk on my toes. ( It's actually kind of a flat-foot diagonal from the outside of my foot across to my big toe.)

Another thing I found in my research was hand flapping. I told myself "Well, there's one I definitely don't do." Then I ate something that tasted really nasty. I started hollering "Ew! Yuck! Bleh!" and -- yep, you guessed it -- started flapping my hands. Mom pointed it out and started snickering, as in a "See? You DO do that." And I do in that type of situation -- all the time.

I think out loud all the time--even at work. I thought it was normal until my mom once told me not to do it in public.

I've noticed three things with regard to my rocking:

1. I've always rocked in my seat in that I would tip the seat so that only the front two legs are on the ground.
2. I often catch myself rocking in conjunction with other stims instead of rocking by itself. I might shake my legs while rocking gently for instance.
3. I seem to rock/sway more when standing that I do when seated (I noticed that I do this before I even considered the possibility of having AS).

Also, I remember my mom telling me once that "people are going to think you have a neurological problem" regarding my non-stop leg-shaking. Um, actually...

I started wondering about things like that too. I used to imitate rhythmic noises around me, like windshield wipers flapping or turn indicators clicking. I still do it in my imagination. And I stare very closely at objects when I'm deep in thought. I got teased when I was in college for staring at a cheese cracker for a long time.

Yes, it happens to me too. Sometimes I catch myself rocking or swinging my legs and wonder if I used to do it before finding out about Asperger's. Then I remember being scolded by my parents in middle school and teased by my ex boyfriend 3-4 years ago because of it, but it still doesn't make me feel sure at all.
Sometimes I feel really guilty about "faking it", even though I'm not sure about having it at all and I try to be as objective and little whiny as I can.

I used to to the turn indicators noise too.

Do you ever find yourself staring blankly at an object or a point in space, like where your vision goes out of focus but your eyes remain fixated on a point?


I don't know if I feel like I'm "faking it" per se, in that these sorts of things I do are not things I do consciously...unless I did them consciously or semi-consciously at some point but now do them subconsciously.