Aspie males offensively generalizing about women!! !

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excellent, i found the link, you should have a quick look at this....

http://www.uvm.edu/~tstreete/powerpose/index.html

it's not too heavy going, consisting mainly of pictures, and goes a long way in explaining the whole attitude that many men these days take towards women. interesting stuff. i got the link from this discussion on the barbelith forum, which in itself is pretty interesting...

http://www.barbelith.com/topic/24472



emoal6, i can see your point, but i'm not sure if what you are suggesting is a fair comparison at all. the sort of men who melantha is talking about have never been raped, they haven't been abused at the hand of some individual woman. they may well be products of society, yes, but i do feel that your comparison is at least slightly onerous. i may have more to say on this matter later, but would be interested in others opinions, particularly if you can take the time to have a look at the link i posted above.

I don't think anyone here has much of a problem with any Aspie women - it's mostly just NT women about which they're complaining. I can somewhat relate - most NT females I know either bore or annoy me. But that's mostly because they just have interests completely different from mine - I don't consider them inferior or less intelligent or only good for sex or anything like that.

alex, that is exactly my point. while melantha may have experienced this attitude among aspie males, what i am suggesting is that this is a common trait among males in general, sad as that may seem.

Melantha-

I like to call it " excuse me...I realize that I don't have a penis, but, do you realize there is a crane over your head; your about to blow something up; your welding over a gas tank; ect" you get the picture.

But really I think it is just that there are all types in every population. I've experienced more acceptance than not-and my skins thick enough now to just tune out the others, if so. But I also think more importantly that the ones who do see us for who we are and what we can be might be in such fear of our georgeous wonder to say such things and tend to be more quiet or respectful in general. Think about it. A person who does not feel sexist is not going to make sexist remarks therefore you are not going to hear them make such remarks. Yes-I think it is silly when I hear women generalized like they are a produce item to be plucked by a consumer-but I can't weigh in to much on it. Because-as with populations there are those who couple for convienience and don't we all have the right to exist?

But I'm hearing you girl, loud and clear. It used to drive me nuts as well. Still does. Sometimes-for instance, at work, it drowns out all the ..... no no it doesn't-the bright stars still shine through, keeping me keeping on and looking up to the fine gents that ARE.

Dont sweat the small beans-just let it make ya go...huh

A guy that used to work with my SO is Asperger's, and he was invited over for dinner and video games one day. He said it was difficult to acknowledge my name or even the fact that I existed, because "Women are a myth" and "Women are just objects to me." We were introduced, but he chose to refer to me as "Woman" instead of my first name. After a few times I said, "Well I'm glad you've managed to muster up enough brain power to determine my gender, but is remebering my name really that much of a challenge?" Everyone in the room laughed at my comment. He blinked then looked away and wouldn't look at me or talk to me after that. I don't know if he was joking, but I was offended by his behaviour. Me and my SO decided we didn't enjoy his company and we haven't invited him back since.

Anyway, regarding this forum, I have noticed this insulting and generalising nature towards women, and maybe a dash of passive aggressiveness, but this seems to be behaviour that is almost exclusively reserved for the sexually frusterated males here. I've noticed quite a bit of generalising about neurologically typical people too. I would say sexually inexperienced or sexually frusterated men are more prone to this, not just Aspie men. Although I suppose Asperger's people can engage in black and white type thinking and be more easily influenced, which may not help with their outlook on life.

I think it's mostly just an issue of Aspies vs. NTs as opposed to an issue of sexism. There are far more male Aspies than female Aspies, so most male Aspies probably don't know any Aspie females in real life and associate females solely with NT females. I don't think NT men are very well-liked here either. It's not just their female counterparts that are getting bashed.

The way I translate that, and your statements seem to imply the same, is that a wife will "let herself go", and weigh more than a girl friend. Sometimes, that is TRUE, and it IS meant as a joke!

HEY, I LOVE women, etc... I have been very civil, EVEN IN PRIVATE! I have said things that could only make them happy and proud! And I did that knowing I may never even know what they looked like, etc...

What do hormones, or genitals have to do with anything here.

GRANTED, some men(AS or NT) might be misogynists, but most DO like women. And I don't necessarily mean anything sexual there. Sometimes I meet women that I like just because of their demeaner, attitude, etc... And sometimes you can see they have the intelligence to go with it.

It is funny that you should mention this. Just today, I met a guy that met his girlfriend on a FARM "KNEE DEEP IN COW DUNG"! He asked her to a dance, and they have been together ever since. She has TRADITIONAL values, is a good cook, etc... She even HATES the idea of him helping. And I thought "MAN, YOU ARE LUCKY"! SOME women HATE that kind of thinking. But HEY, it isn't denigrating AT ALL.

Frankly, what YOU say is denigrating to MEN!

Steve

Good. Apparently he was some kind of jerk. People who do not have Asperger's syndrome are also known to be jerks as well.



Can you provide some (general, quotes are not necessary as I do not want to have specific members insulted) examples? I don't necessarily to get into whether it is "sexually frustrated" or "inexperienced"(?) men who are prone to this. That is probably an interesting discussion but perhaps moves into areas more appropriate for the Adult forum.

I read that in the book, too. That REALLY pisses me the hell off! I felt like the book was calling me a sexist or something and I took very serious offense to that. Talk about false information!

WOW! I don't know who is worse! Him or YOU. HE was just an IDIOT, and was probably very angry at women or something. You should realize that not all men act like him. Gee, I am almost surprised you call your B/F or husband your SO. That IS, in a way, a sign of RESPECT! And I don't mean the kind of respect that won't be returned by him.

Steve

uh..
A: about 3 stone.

I thought it meant 3 stone as in price. The wife is free. The girlfriend may cost a few kopecks.

I am honestly baffled as how to respond to these links as I do not think they demonstrate anything (certainly not sexism). I am not surprised at all one of the links are unfortunately found on an academic (.edu) server. The modern university is home to this sort of nonsense in large measure (with little in the way in reasoned response). Did you know it is women predominately read gossip magazines? I suppose this proves that women are horrible rumor mongers.

Of course that assumption is ridiculous; as are the cited websites.

Yeah, I forgot, you're probably right. OK, still it is a joke. Some women make some REAL bad jokes about men also. BTW I never made such jokes. And you couldn't find anything I have said against any females here.

Steve

You know what? I've had it up to here with these f*****g ret*d gender wars and sexist comments and BS generalizations. It's absolutely ridiculous and causes tempers to rise and arguments to flare up. Why can't we all just get along? Is that too hard to ask? Or is stirring controversy funny? Sorry if I sound like a mod but i'm in a bad mood lately.

Random guy: I know! Let's make women into sex objects!
Random girl: No way! ALL men are sexist pigs!
Me: STOP IT RIGHT f*****g NOW!! !!

Nuff said.

Yeah. Basically, I tend to take people at face value. So regardless of your psychiatric label, gender, or race... if you're acting like a jerk towards me, I'm going to call you on it. I felt he was being disrespectful towards me, and perhaps he did not completely understand that prior to my comment, but I think the social humiliation he probably felt will help him learn. Heck, that's how I learnt quite a bit. A lot of my social behaviours comes from trial and error. Making mistakes, and learning from them.



I don't understand this request. Even if I gave some general information I think I'd be singling people out... but I've replied to posts I disagree with, so my post history may show some examples of what you are looking for. Sorry, but I'm just not sure how to go about this without providing direct quotes. So let's just say, more than a few times I have seen male posters here make generalisations about women, with the same male poster claiming to be sexually inexperienced and/or frusterated in another tread.


I shared this anecdote because someone mentioned how some men can view women as objects in this thread. Believe me, I was shocked by his behaviour. But it was just some guy that came to visit one day. No big deal, especially since I made sure that he was the one that was embarrassed.

WELL SAID!! !! !!

Men are supposed to, BY NATURE, love women. In MY case at least, this is deeper than a mere sexual love. SEX doesn't have to be involved at all.

Some women DO act stupid, seductive in a bad way, etc.... BUT... I'm sure MOST men know that there are many women out there that are SMART, want to be themselves, and respected for who they are. I can tell you I know that.

Women should be able to see under the dirt that may cover some mens characters.... I can only hope that most women realize that many men realize that women can be intelligent and nice as well.

And HEY, I would have no reason to say this if it wasn't true.

Steve