An Angry Personality

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I got angry today. I was paying for my groceries at the grocery store and this man who was in line behind me with his wife got tired of waiting in line. My groceries were still coming through the belt and being rung up and my cart was in front of me, I was between him and my cart. I hate regular sized shopping carts so I never use them. I only use the mini ones. So my cart was small and he could have just walked past it after he walked past me to stand at the end of the register thing where they bag the groceries for you where he wanted to wait for his wife. Well instead of just walking behind me and past my ,mini cart, he walked behind me and then took my cart and moved it to the end of the aisle where I could not reach it. I looked at him and said, "Did you take my cart?" He said. " I knew you would say that so I just moved it out of the way." I was infuriated, I also got anxious and a little scared. And I was already a little insecure because I had bumped into a header and knocked it down while I was shopping and when I was in line there was bass music playing which is one of my misophonic triggers so I was already on edge and needing to get out of there as quickly as I could. I grabbed all of my 7 bags, and I am pretty strong so I did not bother even putting them back in the cart. I left it right where he left it and stormed out. As I walked past him he said, as he saw that I picked up all 7 of my bags together, even the heavy ones, "Oh you shop efficiently." I so much wanted to punch him out and then I wanted to cry but I just kept on walking. Now I can get all my anger out in this post. Yeah.

That sounds like it is worse than my anger issues. I have it in most ways under control unless there is someone talking trash, play-making fun of me. I just simply don'tlike it and it triggers off the anger I already have inside. I used to not care about it and new it was joking, but now it bothers me.

tricyclics and speed-based stimulants used to make me cross. but Strattera had the magic sauce in it, in that I was both alert and relaxed and mellow.

Sometimes people do things that understandably would make another person angry. Sometimes they are deliberately trying to do this. To be angry is a normal response, so just to feel it, but there is a way to transform that anger into compassion. Also, yes, this kind of thing can trigger anger a person already has inside. This is a good insight. So an aim could be to try to transform the anger you have inside---not so easy, but possible. and worth working to do. So how would a person begin to do this?

To Ski Bum. Sorry you had this experience in the grocery store. We know that the man who did this was sick. This does not mean to not feel the anger when it comes up, as to stuff it would be unhealthy, but someday this kind of behavior may not make you angry. I have experiences like this, too but not so much anymore.....

Yeah, he definitely has issues of some kind. Fortunately I was able to very quickly and easily let that go. It's not like I will ever see him again. What is really interesting to me though, is that I also get scared when people do stuff like that to me, I actually almost cried. I think that stems from the part of my brain that is stuck in a little kid mode.

I get angry ALL THE TIME and very trivial things set me off I shout, swear and sometimes punch inanimate objects (one time I got PO at the kitchen bin and punched a large dent in it turns out it cost £40 oops) I find the cats calm me down or certain herbs do but by then it's normally too late and the best thing to do is just let me get it all out of my system.

I grew up always having a cat and they are so awesome. Sometimes when I was a kid I felt like my cat was my only friend. But they really do know how to calm us. They are known for being able to bring down people's blood pressure too. I miss having one so much. Can't afford one now but I often think about the ones I had growing up. Sometimes I still talk to them and that helps me too.

The anger seems to stem from immense fear.

Without my medicine, I am agitated more easily. I did have a short temper back in the day; and without my meds, I still would have one.

I get angry at invalidation and other dehumanizing acts which diminish my personhood in the eyes of the victimizer.

I believe, you´re right.
As a small kid, I was called "the angriest kid north of the alps", and I was actually scared most of the time.
The anger stayed during my teens, and it was really painful to live with, so I looked for ways to make it keep quiet. Suddenly, at 17, it sort of stopped, but so did apparently most of my emotions, and I worried a lot about that.
(Perhaps my brain had matured enough to control anger).
Some years after anxiety became predominant.
It is the other side of the "medal", so to speak.

Jensen, the same exact thing happened with me, an anxiety that also turned into a social anxiety as well. And then in my early 30's, I almost seemed completely normal, and then suddenly it's as though the cycle returned again to the original bouts of anger.

Yeah, I grew angry again later, and then depressed. Ok, I had a tendency to feel depressed already at 3-4. I seem to have had a difficult time at that age, but that still doesn´t explain the anger cycle.
I´d like to know what is really happening underneath, apart from anxiety and why.

Anger is often a screen for other emotions, mainly sorrow. It is easy to be angry but not so easy to feel sorrow, as the feeling of sorrow is somehow to process the fact of something not being the way we may deeply want and need it to be.......

Phew! Yes! I guess you're right. Anger and depression also seems to be two sides of the same medal.

This is a wonderful insight.. So what is anger? It seems to me it is the expression of frustration when a person's ability to act is thwarted. I have been reading a lot about object relations theory recently, specifically the pioneering and extremely influential work of Melanie Klein, and this seems to fit in with that, Basically, speaking in my words, not hers, the entire personality of a person develops around how able he is as an infant is at coping with his own aggression toward the outside world regarding sometimes being thwarted and if he is able to integrate unpleasant experience and ultimately cope with it, and the ability to do this would depend on the consistency and quality of positive experience he has had.