has your aspergers gotten worse from 18-25???
Besides if I mature now, I would lose every part of my personality and be a grumpy no fun adult.
Sometimes I kind of envy those autistics who never "grow up". (No, I'm not saying you're one of them, nor that they are somehow inferior.) I'm pretty anxiety-ridden at the best of times and have burned myself out several times from situations NTs seem to weather without any trouble. Life before I grew up was not nearly as stressful. OTOH, I'm not sure I'd want to give up the freedom and privacy I've gained, and will most likely outlive my parents, making for an uncertain future... so...
RetroGamer87
Veteran

Joined: 30 Jul 2013
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,115
Location: Adelaide, Australia
The symptoms of my asperger's been declining very gradually for my whole life. I no longer experience social anxiety. However, there are other forms of anxiety. My overall level of anxiety peaked at 15. My happiness peaked from 18 to 24 because it was at 25 that I realized I'd ruined my life and I can never get the lost decade back.
^ This ^
I know some aspies who are like that into their 30s. They still act like teenagers. I was just like them until a few months ago. Then I had a shocking epiphany. I just hope I don't get aspie burnout.
Are you sure the cause of your autism is environmental and not genetic?
I am 27 now. I am incredibly self aware about my Aspergers so, in ways, I am higher functioning now than I have ever been but my anxiety is a lot worse now than it was as I was growing up so, in that way, I function a lot lower. I bite and pick at my skin so much more now than I used to, for example.
I wonder if I've 'unlearned' some things, or just being an adult I've made more of an effort to avoid the social occasions that have made me uncomfortable. the earliest I recall doing that was perhaps at 17/18 by not going to see extended family at Christmas. I found the whole 'smalltalk' thing, expected of an older child/young adult, so difficult that one year I decided I could not handle it and I didn't go. I now try to make an effort for such occasions but I know I can't do social conversation (unless it's one on one) and it's still pretty painful.
_________________
AQ: 38
Aspie score: 155 of 200
neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 59 of 200
RAADS-R: Overall: 202.0
"Language" : 20.0
"Social Relatedness" : 98.0
"Sensory/motor": 48.0
"Circumscribed interests" 36.0
Not diagnosed.
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