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I agree with Marcia. Wanting to "be" someone has nothing to do with sexual orientation. I would take anything he says about attraction to others with a grain of salt until after puberty.
That said, I don't see why it should be something to worry about. Worry about keeping him safe and healthy.

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Last edited by angelbear on 29 Oct 2013, 5:00 pm, edited 1 time in total.

maybe he like the boy, not like like him. and maybe he wants to be the boy because he is jealous of him. not because he is attracted to him. thats all i got.

Last edited by Codyrules37 on 29 Oct 2013, 9:05 am, edited 2 times in total.

When I was 9 I used to watch a police TV series and the protagonist was a blonde, tall and beautiful woman. I thought she was the most beautiful woman ever and I had "fallen in love" with her (of course, in the way a 9-year-old can fall in love). It passed when I was 11.
Now I'm 16 and I'm in love with a guy (the only person I've been in love with up to now, if we exclude that actress) that I know in real-life and is a friend of mine.
I don't know what to say, I haven't been in love with enough people yet

I find the OP completely baffling. I have no understanding of how his saying he likes and wants to be another boy has to do with sex.

This actually makes me worry a bit about the psychological processes going on in angelbear... Unless he said he wants to marry the boy, or be his boyfriend, I don't get this at all.

At all.

I think you need to ask yourself why "Sexual orientation" seemed like a good title. It seems to me that either you are not disclosing the real reasons (additional factors) that lead you to conclude he may have gay inclinations, or you have a real problem with your own sexual anxieties intruding into your role as a parent. In either case, you need therapy, angelbear, and you need to leave him out of it.

well they always say theres a little bit of bi in every guy.

Not sure what that has to do with it.

ISTM that sexuality is a spectrum--or a dynamic system with hetero and gay strange attractors and individual libidos orbiting and shifting through a complex three dimensional phase space at the intersection of gender identity, sexual attraction and fantasy... Somewhere there is a place for all of us.

But why doe mom think junior is gay because he said he wants to be another boy? I wanted to BE superman when I was little, but I didn't want to get it on with the man of steel. Later I wanted to be Carl Sagan, but again, I was happy to know his mind and speech, and had no wish to know him in the Biblical sense.

Thinking about the whole thing theoretically, before my libido actually kicked in, I thought that, logically, everyone should be naturally bi. Then I discovered that sexuality is not logical and the desire that women could inspire in me did not appear in response to males.

Again, this had nothing to do with hero worship or wanting to be other people. Those of you who are not asexual know exactly what I mean. This is not theory.

I'm going to say that it's probably just a misunderstanding and he idolizes that boy for being "normal" and something to aspire to. I know it my situation while I felt awkward as a boy in my preschool years (felt more like I should be a girl and was jealous they got to wear dresses) I have ALWAYS been attracted to girls for as long as I can remember. I do know my father and relatives were TERRIFIED I was gay (due to no interest in sex or relationships until 28.) and I cannot for the life of me understand why. I'm straight as a arrow but if I were gay what would be the big deal? People must have misinterpreted my Aspieness and friendliness for homosexuality as a child when that couldn't be further from the truth: I just wanted friends and unfortunately, nobody wanted to be mine because of the 'uncool' factor.

My interpretation of what your son described is that he "hero worships" the other boy. Hero worship is a natural phase that boys go through. It is when they compare themselves with other guys, and find a guy that they wish they were like. A guy that they admire, look up to, and want to be.
For a lot of kids it is their Dad that they want to be like when they grow up, but in todays society that isn't always possible.
A boy needs a male role model. Another male that he admires, respects, and wants to be like.

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Last edited by angelbear on 29 Oct 2013, 5:02 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Imho sexuality its like apples and bananas.

Some people like apples, others like bananas. Some like both, others like none of them.

i knew i liked the same gender at about age 10.

Your last post clarifies things a bit, but still, I wouldn't worry too much about it. Yeah, maybe he's gay and knows it (and, of course, that wouldn't be anything to worry about, either!), but it would probably be very difficult to establish that now. Kids say all sorts of things that adults misinterpret.

When I was about 5 some family members liked to ask me whether I'd prefer to be a boy or a girl. Since I'm male, it amused them to no end when I consistently said "girl"! Had they taken it seriously and become concerned that I might be trans (which I'm not) I might be quite messed up today, who knows! (Well... more messed up!)

I don't get it.
He said he likes that other boy, but how do you know that he loves him?
Maybe he just admires him in a "nonsexual" way?

But yeah autistics are more likely to be homosexual, asexual, bisexual, queer or transgender.
There is even a very good book about it:
Asperger's Syndrome and Sexuality: From Adolescence through Adulthood

http://www.amazon.com/Aspergers-Syndrom ... 079&sr=8-2