Ever get accused of "Splitting Hairs"

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Not in those words, but, heck yeah. Getting a better handle on it in old age.

I do that all of the time. From my point of view I need to use a vocabulary as precise as possible and to make sure whatever I say or write accurately reflects what I think. This leads to me using elaborate sentences and long blocks of text instead of the oversimplifications other people seem to affectionate. I have given up trying to correct people who use inadequate or inaccurate expressions because they react badly to that but it goes against my natural tendencies and I often feel frustrated to have to make do with imperfect symbolic communication. I only let myself completely free with this when I am having intellectual and scientific discussions, since people seem more inclied to understand the need for accuracy in those matters (and even still, it caused me some problems). And I often react very badly to people who use exaggerated expressions loaded with covert emotional significance, for example a criticism (to myself or someone else) which could be fair and justified if it was formulated appropriately but is expressed in a dramatic and excessive way.

Not exactly, but I've gotten accused a lot of being "purposely obtuse". Could this be related to being hyper-focused on one detail? Is this what "splitting hairs" is?

It doesn't happen quite every day.

Hello,

I occasionally use this or a synonymous expression when commenting on my kids utterances (usually with an exaggerated grin so he get's the point)
When talking to him about his communication style, I try to think along the lines of Grice's principles:
(I took them out of an old uni handout - but I'm sure you'll find them online - they are old but still useful, I think)

Those priciples for me embrace both his need to be precise and the objective need for communication to function and be successful;
and of course he had to learn that people who don't understand his way of talking are not stupid or shallow, but
may just be using different communication styles suited to communication partners, social setting and importance of subject matter etc.
or still simpler - taking examples from his sourroundings - may have grown up in hard and violent times in a poor familiy where skills that safed you from starving or being killed were more important than verbal precision.

Greetings

Ennik

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Quote from uni handout - Griece's principles:

Maxim of Quantity: Information
Make your contribution as informative as is required for the current purposes of the exchange.
Do not make your contribution more informative than is required.

Maxim of Quality: Truth
Do not say what you believe to be false.
Do not say that for which you lack adequate evidence.

Maxim of Relation: Relevance
Be relevant.

Maxim of Manner: Clarity (“be perspicuous”)
Avoid obscurity of expression.
Avoid ambiguity.
Be brief (avoid unnecessary prolixity).
Be orderly.

The funny thing about people who do this, is often enough, they're splitting hairs by complaining that you're splitting hairs because they don't like the fact that you're right. Which happens to be my experience. Flat out, people hate being wrong/proven wrong because it makes them look and feel stupid, so they'll shift the conversation/argument into a blame game so they can maintain their own illusion of correctness. It's to stroke their own egos and nothing more. It's petty and it's a waste of time to entertain such people.

The mental image I see is of a hare being split into another hare.

I still don't know if I properly understand this term. To Google I go!

Yes, and some of the times it was because I wasn't quite sure what they meant, because the way they said it wasn't correct and so it could've meant something else. So I was correcting them to verify what they meant. Sometimes they also get annoyed because they have to spell it out, rather than me just intuitively understanding what they're thinking. Usually this happens with my dad, which, ironically, does the same (he's most likely an aspie himself). Seeing that, that in turn annoys me, I guess I'm no better than he is. It's a vicious circle.

Yes. For example:
Husband: It's like $150
Me: Actually, it's $147.50 ....okayyyyy $150
Husband: shakes head.....

LOL

Splitting hairs also means being precise. You knew what someone meant but you insist on correcting them anyway.

I remember the time when my DHS nurse told me about treating two year olds the same as adults and I told her you cannot treat them like how you would treat an adult because you don't expect them to work, have jobs, make their own food, go out on their own, drive a car and make decisions on their own they are not capable of an adult is, so if you were treating them as you would treat an adult, you would be expecting them to do all those things so it's impossible to treat a child the same as an adult and she told me "You know what I mean." I guess that would be "splitting hairs" I was doing.

I have a habit of being really accurate with numbers (among everything else, basically). I'd say "150, well, 149,99."

Actually I was at a store right before New Years, and the cashier had massive problems registering the price for one of my items, she probably used 10 minutes, and when she finally got up a price, it said 79,00 instead of 79,50, which was the price she said it was, so, me being overly concerned with detail, told her this (and just to put it in perspective, this wasn't dollars it was NOK, so 0,5 is worth 8 cents), which resulted in me having to wait another couple of minutes, if not more.

Hubby sometimes wants to pull his hair out when I get ridiculously nitpicky like this. I know it's ridiculous too but just can't help it!

I find if you make a joke as you correct someone, they take it better. Even if you know what someone means or know something is an error and you still feel the need to point it out, make a joke about it.

So, I guess splitting hairs means a trivial or irrelevant objection that is meant to divert attention from the topic at hand.

Yes, I do this all the time. I always wondered why people told me to "stop explaining things". I commonly bring up very detailed information about a topic, or say things that SEEM irrelevant, but aren't (at least to me).

Often!

Yes! That is the whole idea! The image.
Imagine how precise, you would have to be.
That is the kind of precision, aspies often aim for, when explaining, - or understanding.
----because there are more sides to things, than average NT´s usually consider, unless the situation specifically calls for it.
Aspies tend to consider them all, - every time

Yes, my friends call me "Encyclopedia" .....