How much of our problem is really the Autism?

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I have a diagnosed mood disorder...though the real difficulty is still communicating verbally.

No, underdeveloped social skills do not lead to bullying and ostracization. The presence of bullies leads to bullying and ostracization. Underdeveloped social skills just make us less able to defend ourselves.

Just like being a child does not cause others to sexually abuse you - just makes you an easier target for people who are inclined to sexually abuse others.

Abuse is fundamentally caused by the abuser's problems, not by the characteristics they use to choose their victims.

ADHD, major depression, two or three different anxiety diagnoses over the years, PTSD, panic disorder (in remission).

My dad, who died a few years ago, was a terrible bully. My mum, I've become increasingly aware over the past few years, is batshit crazy. This has lead me to the rather disheartening realisation that I never really stood a chance of growing into a mentally healthy adult, even if certain more obviously damaging events had not occurred.

As for autism, I don't even know if I have it, but the thought has crossed my mind that if I do, that might have further contributed to the bad relationship I have with my mother. She doesn't deal well with difficulty of any sort, so whatever oddness I possess probably didn't exactly endear me to her. (I generally don't remember all that much from my childhood, but I do remember her mocking me for my issues with scratchy clothes.)

I have served on several committees and things got really bad when I started to feel really strongly that everybody there just viewed me as a problem and that they were angry I was there. My days and weeks got really bad. After I stabilized my mood, I found that some of it had been paranoia; it was amazing to suddenly see from a new perspective how irrational I had been. However, I agree with the OP that this was fall-out from past experiences. Like PTSD, although I dont know enough about PTSD to know if it counts as that. (and I mean no disrespect to anybody who has been in a bloody war, etc. and had serious PTSD from it. )

The only problem i have with that is, based on the two large teen forums im on, tons of NT kids get picked on too.
Lots of them have suffered a lot more abuse than i have and have a lot more baggage. Personally, i like NT's just fine. Its just mean and jerky NTs i dont like. Then again there were a number of mean jerky autistic kids in special needs school i did not like either.

Were you ever abused or bullied due to autism making you a seemingly easy target?



But don't people who "don't fit in" get bullied far more often and easily?

I think most of my problems are psychological and physical. Not neurological. I get extremely tired due to insomnia and health issues. This tiredness causes processing issues that I don't naturally have(brain fog.) I have a lot of psychological issues due to being a special ed student, naturally sensitive and getting bullied.

A lot of people compare Aspies and NTs to Macs(Aspies) and PCs(NTs). I don't feel like a fully functioning Mac or PC. I feel like an outdated PC with a lot of viruses. I also think the whole idea of different neurologies is fundamentally flawed. Everyone has a unique brain, even people with the same "neurotype".

That was my whole issue with labels and stuff... But the neurotype thingy does give me an identity to help me feel secure. I believe in neurodiversity in general (without neurotyping) and labels are only very, very initial guides before encountering a person and then approaching them as an individual, except for the groupness idenitity piece.

I don't really have any psychological problems. I'm one of these happy-go-lucky, almost constantly happy people. But if I do happen to be upset, I can't hide it from others at all. So I think all of my differences are autism-related.

Me three. And for years I didn't let myself get close to anyone at all because of it. But when I finally let myself get close to someone, and I was really happy for the first time in my life, this person betrayed me on so many levels I could not begin to describe them all. I was cut off with no explanation, bullied, and publicly humiliated. I have never been treated so cruelly or unfairly before in all my life, and to be treated this way by someone I very deeply loved and trusted and felt so close to is just beyond words. I want to heal from it but it is a pain that just keeps on giving over and over again, and it is incomprehensible to me that this could have happened. I took him at his word that he would stay friends with me. I don't know if I can ever trust someone like that again, and I am not happy being alone either, so I don't know what to do. I spend some days just sobbing and unable to get out of bed because it hurts so much. Then I can numb myself for awhile and almost feel okay but then I remember everything that happened and it just hurts so much I can't bear it.

My whole life has been like this, it's like a routine, I can't socialize the way other people do because I don't understand what is going on, then I get hurt, or get scared that I may get hurt because I misread something, and I have to distance myself from people, and/or other people distance themselves from me because I am so emotionally vulnerable it is too uncomfortable for them and me both, and then I try to heal but I can't really understand what happened or why other people treat me the way they do so it happens again, and again, and again. If I could understand what goes wrong maybe I could stop getting hurt but I think and analyze every situation and I never understand WHY people act the way they do or what in the world I could have done differently. It never makes any sense. So it is hard to see any hope for the future, although I am still stupidly, naively optimistic and always hopeful, it is hard to see HOW anything can actually get any better when the same situations repeat in my life over and over, and each time the emotional fallout only gets deeper.

its not the fault of any disability for a target getting bullied, its the bigotism,prejudice,ignorance and discrimination that is deeply embedded in society towards people who dont fit into the one size fits all mould.
have a research on the social model of disability.

dont include all of us under that, it is only some people,have personaly been severely mentaly and physicaly bullied entire life by NTs and non NTs both at infant and junior school plus a special college that was based on the site of an EBD school,in the community and during the decade have spent in institutional care by both residents and staff,am mentaly damaged by them-not by autism or intelectual disability.

the worst damage came from a now thankfuly banned predatory user on here who pretended to be a specific blonde haired female and low functioning moderately PDDNOS autistic.
on here and across the other forums was stalked to by them with the use of many sockpuppets; did a very long term campaign of bullying [obvious and cryptic],sickening resentment,irrational jealousy,prejudice and bigotism, gaslighting, threatening and collecting disability experiences plus specific information of mine by pretending to be interested in helping themselves-and imitating it in a pityful way for attention,was deliberately targeted due to level of vulnerability,easy target,plus inability to express to anyone what was happening and its the main cause of why had ended up sectioned for four months.
-NTs arent anywhere close to being that unstable in personality.

NTs do that kind of thing as well. I've been followed around the web, had my posts copy and pasted, had untrue things posted about me, had threatening emails (threatening to get me banned everywhere on the internet etc), had hatred incited against me in regards to other users, they used sockpuppets but accused me of being a sockpuppet/fake/malingerer...etc. I am not the only one, another lady had a blog set up purely to slander/libel her and it was vicious, it nearly got her fired from her job. Except I responded badly and pretty much had a breakdown over it whereas the other lady got the blog removed and they stopped. People just let them carry on harassing me, even moderators on various sites. They seemed to think I deserved it as they had been told by the bullies I was being deliberately difficult when I made a social mistake..I still don't what the hell the mistakes were exactly, people won't tell me. I don't cope well with bullying..I attempted suicide over bullying when I was a teenager and don't know how to deal with. I tried lots of things from using reason, to attacking them back, to making a video telling them to back off in an attempt to defend myself but whatever I did was the wrong thing and made things worse. Could never get any help in regards to stopping it...I asked repeatedly. It made socialising even harder for me because not only did I not know how to go about it properly I was ostracised because of the bullying which made developing my social skills impossible.

How can I develop my social skills if no one will socialise with me?

NTs can be hideously cruel to the point I would say that bullies actually suffer from some kind of sickness that needs to be put into the DSM instead of passed off as acceptable normal behaviour.

PS sorry you had to go through what you did, you seem like a lovely person and no one should have to put up with the kind of abuse you went through.

It entirely depends on what bothers you based on your ASD and the external environment.

Say, a typical odd and eccentric person with AS (one of the mildest forms) whom is bullied immensely at school and later work, will most likely find that others are his or her problem.

The individual whom can't interact with people at all and lacks self-help skills would have another opinion on this matter.

I have been watching jaws 2 every night for the last 3 nights now. I also like the Reef. The latter is very realistic and based on a true story. They used footage of real Great White Sharks and cut it with the actors to make it look like they were in the water together. If you like shark movies it is a good one to see. Films like Dinoshark are just silly but can be fun all the same.

Sharks are awesome.

I love how they eat people.

My problems are down to AS, asthma, allergies, learning problems in maths and sciences, poor concentration and lacking motivation.