Handing out "I LOVE YOU" cards at my college

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Don't. Do. It.
If you're fine with hugs, free hugs would be a better idea. Really.

+1,000,000,000,000,000

Geez, bud, we're all telling you not to do this, for so many reasons. And you're still planning on doing this? Don't you realize that one symptom of Asperger's is impulsivity and lack of knowing what other people are thinking, and how they're react? I can tell you're in love with this idea and can't get it out of your head (another ASD trait), but now is the time to say, "Ok, that was a cool idea, but NO." Please, don't do this.

Being on the receiving end of this would make me very uncomfortable and I would not want my picture taken either whether it was posted online or not. I had a cab driver ask to take my picture once and it was really creepy and I ended up letting him do it because I wasn't expecting it and wasn't prepared to refuse.

Possible likely outcomes:
1. The recipient will be rude/offensive and walk off.
2. The recipient will punch you in the face... and walk off.
3. The recipient will call you a weirdo and walk off and tell everyone they know that you are a weirdo
4. The recipient will think you belong to a religious cult and are trying to proselytise them.
5. The recipient will report you to the police / authorities.
6. The recipient will take it very personally and 99.99% will feel embarrassed and not want anything to do with you.
7. The 0.01% will ask you out on a date but you will have to explain that you don't date middle aged bikers with beards.

Wow, that sounds like just the sort of idea I would have!

Though not exactly the same thing, in the past I have done things not too dissimilar. The results were... not what I hoped for.

Today when I get ideas along those lines, I try to tell myself: "If it is a good idea today, it will still be a good idea next week." Then I do my best to wait. The waiting period gives me a chance to let cool off any hypo-maniacal impulsivity.

If you are in the U.S. and interested in imaging work such as retouch, photography, etc., I might mention the importance of reading up on both copyright and privacy laws. (Hint: Keep in mind they are two different things; they are often confused.)

^ Good advice. Please take heed.

The free hugs idea is a good one because it gives people the option to participate or not. That way you are not imposing on anyone. You could make it free I love yous instead of hugs. Taking photos with people and posting them online is not a good thing to do. I missed that part when I read the thread yesterday.

When I was a kid I used to make cards for all my teachers saying I love you, until I got a male teacher in the 4th grade, then my mom told me I had to stop because it might be taken as having a crush on the teacher. I didn't understand and it made me really sad I couldn't say I love you anymore without it maybe being misinterpreted. So I think I understand where you are coming from.

I think it is sweet to tell people you love them, but you can't expect to make friends this way. This is something you can only do as an expression of unconditional love, without any expectations or attachment to how others respond, because you are certain to get a lot of negative responses. This is NOT the way to make friends. No I would not want to be friends with someone because they did this.

Why do I get the impression the original picture was in rainbow letters just so that you could make this comment in regards to it?


That aside, probably not a good idea....and even if you hand it out in red if you gave it to a male they might still think you're gay. Or where you only planning to hand these out to girls? If you are for real with this, I'd maybe find another way to attempt to be more outgoing and make friends that is not as likely to weird people out.

I thought at first you were going to prank the people at college by discreetly putting the ''I love you'' notes on their tables/chairs/in their bags when they weren't looking and seeing what their reaction will be when they see them. Then when you said you was going to be taking pictures of yourself with the people you give them to, I thought that'd be giving yourself away. Then I realised you were being serious.

I'll say don't do it. I know handing a note to someone saying ''I love you'' sounds really nice, but in the NT world, it is considered odd. A few might take it as a nice gesture, but most will probably judge it against you. That's just how it goes, unfortunately.

Speaking of unfortunate ways the average human mind works, a popular kid or teenager or youngster, however, can get away with this - but probably as a joke. So if some really popular person (usually a boy) printed out a load of those notes with their mates and went around randomly giving them to people as a funny joke, they will probably get a kick out of it and make some people laugh and others might roll their eyes but still take it as a silly joke.

Aww, I can see where you're coming from. If I was at the same college as you, I'd be your friend and I'll treat you like one too, not just in college but also hang out outside of college too.

When I was 14 my ''friends'' were acting like jerks to me, and so I thought it was time for me to be outgoing and make new friends. So I done something really stupid; I kind of chose a group of girls that always hung out together in school, and I decided to follow them around and hope that they will let me into their group. Unfortunately I failed miserably, and I felt like such a fool afterwards. Deep down I knew that was going to end in bad results anyway, but I was just hoping that these girls might be kind enough to let me into their group, being so they seemed kind. And luckily they were kind, because they didn't pick on me afterwards or spread nasty things about me around the school, but they still weren't kind enough to let me into their group. Instead they told a teacher on me. I wish they had just said themselves, because I felt more humiliated and depressed when I had to be called into the office and have it all explained to me. What was I thinking???

When I was in middle school, I skipped from place to place when I was happy and I found out the hard way that people thought I was homo, my best friend was the first to point and laugh at me to my face and tell me. Ever since then i have been careful with my actions. I understand that if I don't plan on saying something perfectly planned out it will come across as unusual and Tallyman's list of things that could happen will happen.

Maybe I should wait until my hair grows back into what my avatar looks like so I don't look like a crazy gay army man looking for shower sex ha.

Okay so let's just say I HAVE to do this, what would be a good way to introduce myself?

Why do you HAVE to introduce yourself to people?

No, I just want it to be funny, not creepy. It's fine if it is awkward, but I don't want to get in trouble and I don't know how to do this.

What do you mean by you "have" to do this? Did someone put you up to it? You don't have to listen to them, and you can report them if they threatened you with reprecussions and you feel they're serious about carrying them out.

If you just mean you "have" to in that it feels like the only way to make friends, it's not. Approach friendship the way you would any other task; aspie style. Pick one person, someone in your dorm room or who sits next to you in class, and introduce yourself to them, have a conversation, pick a current event or what you thought of last week's test, something neutral that you both have in common. If it goes well, have another one the next day. Focus more energy on one or a few people instead of a little bit spread over half the campus, just be sure you don't wind up stalking your new potential friend or coming on too strong or that will freak them out. My campus has a social skills class hosted by the student psych services, you could see if you have one of those and join it; it'll simultaneously give you the opportunity to make friends with people more like you, and teach you the skills you need to potentially try out something like your "I love you" idea in a more socially appropriate way. As far as the current idea though, I agree with everyone else; don't do it, try something more subtle.

Marshmallow, you're beginning to annoy me. We have told you umpteen times to drop this bad idea, yet you persist. It's almost like you want to crash and burn.

If you want to make friends, you will need to play by NT rules. Introduce yourself. Be polite. Listen. Use verbal "scripts" etc. Avoid witty or silly jokes. Part amicably from the person with a handshake. As time goes on you'll be able to talk about deeper things. but NTs test the waters through exchanges that at first seem artificial, but which to them are very important.

You may want to talk to your therapist on the best way to make new friends.